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    normally I follow the policy that in relationships honesty is the best policy. but last night my boyfriend asked me questions where I felt that maybe lying was better?

    Like he asked whether I had ever faked it (orgasm). I have, but I said I hadn't. I don't think he was happy or relieved about this, he was purely asking out of interest in a jokey way. Should I have told him the truth? He also said "isn't it disgusting?" about swallowing and asked what it tasted of. I said it wasn't, even though it's not the most pleasant thing on the planet. With that I almost felt like saying yeaaah it's a bit gross but I do it for you, cos I don't want him to think it's really tasty when I'm sure going down on me isn't either. Obviously I didn't and I said it was fine.

    Is it better to say a little white lie or to be honest about this sort of stuff? Not a serious problem, just wondering really.
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    Be honest. If you start lying about what you do and don't like, sex with him will end up being really unenjoyable.
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    Just say the truth the questions he asked were hardly anything big, hes not dumb. most girls have faked before, and *** is hardly the best tasting thing on the planet, he knows that, hes not thick !
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    (Original post by Bear_Grylls)
    Just say the truth the questions he asked were hardly anything big, hes not dumb. most girls have faked before, and *** is hardly the best tasting thing on the planet, he knows that, hes not thick !
    And you know it too.

    Oh yeahhhh
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    Those kinds of lies are fine - BUT you need to suffer the consequences and it will be you who suffers.

    In the faking orgasm case, if you were honest and told him why you faked it and how he could do it better than after some initial embarrassment and stuff he would, believe it or not, take your advise and give you some real orgasms.

    In the swallowing thing - he's gonna keep doing it without even considering that you dislike it now wheras if you were honest if you were ever just really not in the mood to swallow you could explain and you wouldn't have to do it.

    So in both cases there's no skin off his nose from you lying so I would hardly feel guilty. It's just making problems for you though tbh...
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    I would have said tell the truth but last night my guy kept saying over and over again that I was taking ages then after I just got fed up and faked it...even after he was like you took 20 minutes! I felt really bad =/
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    (Original post by Promesse)
    I would have said tell the truth but last night my guy kept saying over and over again that I was taking ages then after I just got fed up and faked it...even after he was like you took 20 minutes! I felt really bad =/
    20 minutes really isn't that long? I mean I never take that long myself - but he's a dude so he can just ... do it again? The second time always takes ages!
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    Hmm yeah I guess, but then he would just feel really bad every time I swallowed and I want him to relax/ enjoy himself rather than be like "oh she hates doing this".

    with the faking, I would happily tell him, but I have been told in the past that this is the worst confidence-crusher ever for guys and they'd rather not know.
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    (Original post by tis_me_lord)
    20 minutes really isn't that long? I mean I never take that long myself - but he's a dude so he can just ... do it again? The second time always takes ages!
    I didn't think it was long either but i'm not that experienced so I wasn't sure :o:

    and it was really off putting when he kept saying you're taking ages when I started getting somewhere...put me right back to phase one haha
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    Tactful lying can be ok sometimes. But seeing as it's with a person you are close to and trust etc. Maybe it could be for the best to be truthful?
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    (Original post by ***amy***)
    with the faking, I would happily tell him, but I have been told in the past that this is the worst confidence-crusher ever for guys and they'd rather not know.
    Not really. As a guy you should always keep your mind open to exploring new ways and developing what already works to please your lady. Like everything it takes practice. And so, if you tell him what you want him to do and he does it right it'll be a bigger confidence boost for the both of you.
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    (Original post by Promesse)
    I didn't think it was long either but i'm not that experienced so I wasn't sure :o:

    and it was really off putting when he kept saying you're taking ages when I started getting somewhere...put me right back to phase one haha
    You should tell him he's being too quick.
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    (Original post by tis_me_lord)
    You should tell him he's being too quick.
    I may just try that :p:
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    It probably depends on you. I can't orgasm from sex, or I never have, and I spent the first year of our relationship lying about it and saying I could when I couldn't. It made me feel really guilty, but also resentful because I wasn't getting real satisfaction. It took me a really long time to work up to telling him about it, and now I feel so much better.

    One-off small lies are more okay, in my books, but the minute it becomes a long-term thing it can get worse for both of you. >_<
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    I would have come in and said honesty is always necessary, but I don't know for sure (to be honest). I think I'd be fine with knowing my come tasted nasty, but faking an orgasm? That's going to hit the ego, y'know? Anything else, definitely be honest, even if it is going to harm a relationship, as I've found out before. I think I just don't like lying much. When it comes to the taste of your seminal or vaginal fluids it might get hazy, but I'd go for the truth there anyway. Faking orgasm though? Depends on your boyfriend. There's no objective answer here.
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    I'm always honest, personally. With stuff like swallowing, it's possible to be honest whilst also being tactful, like "Well, semen isn't really my favourite flavour, but I enjoy doing it because you enjoy it". I think most men wouldn't argue with that .
 
 
 
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