ladyalpatera
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#1
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#1
ok so basically this girl told me she liked me, I said I didn't like her, fast forward a few years, it changed. I liked her, she liked me back but was in a relationship etc, didn't want to date me as I'm not sure on my sexuality (I'm a girl too). but she said she doesn't want a relationship in general, and now she said she does, but she's scared of being hurt (she always gets groomed basically). but she asked me if I'd like to make out with her so that I can practice and see if I actually like girls, she's the only person I've ever loved though and it sounds too good to be true (and awkward!). but she said that it has to be short or she won't be able to stop herself(!). so it seems to me like she does like me back but there's something stopping her?? I don't understand what is going through her head

EDIT: plus I've never had a relationship so I have no idea what my sexuality is, all I know that I've never had a crush on someone like this, this is so real compared to those (which I probably had just for the fun of the chase because looking back, they weren't attractive to me at all, but she is), I'm thinking that I may be asexual and sapphic ? I don't understand I think I just might be scared because my family are so homophobic and I'm terrified of getting outed by dating her, and also scared of lesbian sex because (!!) I don't understand how it works ://
Last edited by ladyalpatera; 1 month ago
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LovelyMrFox
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#2
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Youve made so many posts on this girl.
'It has to be short'? Referring to the relationship? She sounds like shes not sure what she wants. You guys need to sit down and talk. Tell her what your telling us, because we have no advice left to give.
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ladyalpatera
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(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
Youve made so many posts on this girl.
'It has to be short'? Referring to the relationship? She sounds like shes not sure what she wants. You guys need to sit down and talk. Tell her what your telling us, because we have no advice left to give.
I know, because she's important to me :// no the making out, and yeah but idk, she's gonna be upset, because she's been thinking about it I think (posting couples kissing on her sc, and saying how she doesn't/does want a relationship) I'm just so confused ://
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LovelyMrFox
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(Original post by ladyalpatera)
I know, because she's important to me :// no the making out, and yeah but idk, she's gonna be upset, because she's been thinking about it I think (posting couples kissing on her sc, and saying how she doesn't/does want a relationship) I'm just so confused ://
Tell her that. Communication is important, and necessary for this relationship to move forward. Even Im confused at this situation.
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ladyalpatera
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(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
Tell her that. Communication is important, and necessary for this relationship to move forward. Even Im confused at this situation.
lmaoo fair enough but idk how I'd talk to her about it? like we've been 'talking?' again for like 3 months and she said stuff in an arguement also about 'im needy' 'i text too much' then said 'i don't text her enough' wtf? she kept saying things that are the complete opposite of eachother and like idk I don't wanna fight again and ruin our friendship but also, mabye I should wait until we see eachother in person, I think we need to talk about it in real life :/
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LovelyMrFox
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(Original post by ladyalpatera)
lmaoo fair enough but idk how I'd talk to her about it? like we've been 'talking?' again for like 3 months and she said stuff in an arguement also about 'im needy' 'i text too much' then said 'i don't text her enough' wtf? she kept saying things that are the complete opposite of eachother and like idk I don't wanna fight again and ruin our friendship but also, mabye I should wait until we see eachother in person, I think we need to talk about it in real life :/
Fair enough. You could meet up for a socially distanced talk, perhaps?
Its important you talk about this. If she cant deal with your concerns, I suggest you find someone else. This girl seems to be dragging you ever which way- something I wouldnt put up with. You need to know where you stand in this relationship, and if she cant provide that for you, you need to rethink this.
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ladyalpatera
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(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
Fair enough. You could meet up for a socially distanced talk, perhaps?
Its important you talk about this. If she cant deal with your concerns, I suggest you find someone else. This girl seems to be dragging you ever which way- something I wouldnt put up with. You need to know where you stand in this relationship, and if she cant provide that for you, you need to rethink this.
can't, it's 5 miles rule and I live 10 miles away 🥺 and you're right, thank you so much, you're always so helpful!!
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LovelyMrFox
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(Original post by ladyalpatera)
can't, it's 5 miles rule and I live 10 miles away 🥺 and you're right, thank you so much, you're always so helpful!!
10 divided by 2 = 5 miles? You could meet in the middle? :lol:
Thank you :hugs: If you ever need anything, feel free to pm me.
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ladyalpatera
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(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
10 divided by 2 = 5 miles? You could meet in the middle? :lol:
Thank you :hugs: If you ever need anything, feel free to pm me.
😂you're right, but where I live is rural, and she lives in a town, and there isn't really a half-way point to it😕and thank you so much, I'll keep that in mind❤️
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ladyalpatera
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#10
(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
10 divided by 2 = 5 miles? You could meet in the middle? :lol:
Thank you :hugs: If you ever need anything, feel free to pm me.
update: I might be going to hang out with her this Wednesday 😶😶I'm so nervous😭
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LovelyMrFox
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(Original post by ladyalpatera)
update: I might be going to hang out with her this Wednesday 😶😶I'm so nervous😭
Dont be nervous! Be firm, and tell her what you need to. Have you heard of assertive communication?
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ladyalpatera
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(Original post by LovelyMrFox)
Dont be nervous! Be firm, and tell her what you need to. Have you heard of assertive communication?
you're right. thanks, and no. what is it?
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LovelyMrFox
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(Original post by ladyalpatera)
you're right. thanks, and no. what is it?
Its pretty much just being firm with what your saying, but not aggressive.
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