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How to become a better listener?

I lack too much patience, struggle to my own thoughts/judgements aside when I'm listening, and feel like those close to me are always repeating themselves so I lose motivation to listen to their explanations especially when I'm angry. Very fixated on my own mind/problems. I also have ADHD.

But this drives us apart, and they say that I still don't understand them and don't listen. It makes me feel trapped in my own inability to be open.

How can I be more open and respect their stories without the same pre-judgements? I do not have this problem with strangers, more so close ones.

What are some tips for listening for long periods of time without interrupting/thinking my own thoughts too much?
Reply 1
Avatar for Abzzz57
Abzzz57
16
Original post by Anonymous
I lack too much patience, struggle to my own thoughts/judgements aside when I'm listening, and feel like those close to me are always repeating themselves so I lose motivation to listen to their explanations especially when I'm angry. Very fixated on my own mind/problems. I also have ADHD.

But this drives us apart, and they say that I still don't understand them and don't listen. It makes me feel trapped in my own inability to be open.

How can I be more open and respect their stories without the same pre-judgements? I do not have this problem with strangers, more so close ones.

What are some tips for listening for long periods of time without interrupting/thinking my own thoughts too much?

Hi, it would be worth watching or reading things on active listening, also just practice actually listening so if someone is talking to you take in each and every single word, and once they have finished take a few seconds to form your response.. don't think about what you want to say before they finish as that is probably why you are missing what they say..

Good luck! And don't worry too much once you've picked up the techniques it will get easier!
Original post by Anonymous
I lack too much patience, struggle to my own thoughts/judgements aside when I'm listening, and feel like those close to me are always repeating themselves so I lose motivation to listen to their explanations especially when I'm angry. Very fixated on my own mind/problems. I also have ADHD.

But this drives us apart, and they say that I still don't understand them and don't listen. It makes me feel trapped in my own inability to be open.

How can I be more open and respect their stories without the same pre-judgements? I do not have this problem with strangers, more so close ones.

What are some tips for listening for long periods of time without interrupting/thinking my own thoughts too much?

noticing the problem is the first step

take some time to notice your emotions next time it happens
and the time after that
Reply 3
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Abzzz57
Hi, it would be worth watching or reading things on active listening, also just practice actually listening so if someone is talking to you take in each and every single word, and once they have finished take a few seconds to form your response.. don't think about what you want to say before they finish as that is probably why you are missing what they say..

Good luck! And don't worry too much once you've picked up the techniques it will get easier!

Thank you :smile:

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