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Was it my fault? watch

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    Anon as person in question is on here sometimes.
    This is a bit of a long story, but basically a few weeks ago I was staying in my friend's room (he is male, i'm female) at his uni for the weekend. I'd fancied him for ages but he's only recently split with his girlfriend so I obviously wasn't going to make it clear I liked him in that way.
    So basically one night at the weekend we kinda went a bit far and gave each other hand jobs and stuff :o: but the thing is he only kissed me once for about 1 second and that was it. This was the first time I'd ever done anything sex-related and I was really naive and had no idea what was meant to happen or anything But I did find it a bit weird that no real kissing happened beforehand lol.
    So once I got home I questioned him about his feelings for me etc. and it came to light that he actually has no feelings for me other than friend ones, and was only doing it because he "felt sorry for me" (me having gone through a rough time recently). Also, he said it didn't come across as him wanting to do it, when he initiated it to begin with! That made me so mad. I just had no idea what to do and went along with it, but I can't stop blaming myself and to know he really doesn't like me like that is really hurting Was it my fault?

    Sorry for the long post, had to get things off my chest!
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    it doesn't sound like your fault. but it isn't completely his either. you were willing, so you can't completely blame him

    but i think he is a git for taking advantage :hugs:
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    TBH it doesn't sound like there is any 'fault' to be apportioned here, however you both sound equally responsible for what happened.
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    I don't think it's your fault, more on his part for taking advantage of the situation. Like emilina said. I think you're gonna have to get over him if "you've fancied him for ages". You might end up getting hurt even more so.
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    (Original post by Prudy)
    TBH it doesn't sound like there is any 'fault' to be apportioned here, however you both sound equally responsible for what happened.
    I know it's just i'm really confused about why it even happened in the first place If he didn't like me like that why did he even bother?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know it's just i'm really confused about why it even happened in the first place If he didn't like me like that why did he even bother?
    Sadly there doesn't have to be any feeling behind those sort of actions.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know it's just i'm really confused about why it even happened in the first place If he didn't like me like that why did he even bother?
    Sometimes these things 'just happen'. The moment takes people over, as does sexual arousal. I wouldn't take his subsequent declaration of no romantic interest as an insult. You still have a friend. Don't let this harm that.
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    If he knew you liked him that way, it was unfair of him to mislead you I think. It's strange to do it because he feels sorry for you, i.e. wants to make you feel better when it quite obviously is going to wind up making you feel worse.

    But I would possibly put it down to a genuine mistake on his part (albeit a bloody stupid mistake) - just try to get over it!
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    (Original post by tis_me_lord)
    If he knew you liked him that way, it was unfair of him to mislead you I think. It's strange to do it because he feels sorry for you, i.e. wants to make you feel better when it quite obviously is going to wind up making you feel worse.

    But I would possibly put it down to a genuine mistake on his part (albeit a bloody stupid mistake) - just try to get over it!
    He did know I liked him as well! We're gonna still be friends but it's a bit of a let down, my first sexual experience and everything.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He did know I liked him as well! We're gonna still be friends but it's a bit of a let down, my first sexual experience and everything.
    Did he know this as well? It's easy to mess with a girl's head, especially when it is the first sexual experience. It doesn't help the situation if you haven't done that kind of thing before, especially with someone you like.
    I'd just stick to being friends and an absolute no to anything sexual or you will get more hurt.
 
 
 
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