I’m so embarrassed to have sex (21 year old guy)

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Anonymous #1
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So my penis and foreskin in particular is covered in these white/pale horrid looking spots. I had these checked out a while back and my doctor just dismissed it and said “they’re normal“ and left it at that. The thing is it has affected my confidence so much, I get so embarrassed and nervous at the thought of having sex with a girl incase she would notice and call them out, then I’d have to explain. Just the thought of having a one night stand and then the girl looking at it and screaming “what is that?” and leaving and telling all her friends etc I have a spotty penis frightens me, yet I really want to have sex and I’m kinda embarrassed that I’m still a virgin. I am also insecure that one of my balls is bigger than the other, and again this was checked out with an ultrasound and nothing was wrong. I just don’t know what to do or whether I need to seek advice? Would be great to hear thoughts from guys in similar situations and also what girls think of this?
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gurupet
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So my penis and foreskin in particular is covered in these white/pale horrid looking spots. I had these checked out a while back and my doctor just dismissed it and said “they’re normal“ and left it at that. The thing is it has affected my confidence so much, I get so embarrassed and nervous at the thought of having sex with a girl incase she would notice and call them out, then I’d have to explain. Just the thought of having a one night stand and then the girl looking at it and screaming “what is that?” and leaving and telling all her friends etc I have a spotty penis frightens me, yet I really want to have sex and I’m kinda embarrassed that I’m still a virgin. I am also insecure that one of my balls is bigger than the other, and again this was checked out with an ultrasound and nothing was wrong. I just don’t know what to do or whether I need to seek advice? Would be great to hear thoughts from guys in similar situations and also what girls think of this?
Hi, that sounds like Fordyce Spots if you haven't received a diagnosis. According to the NHS website, 80-95% of adults have them. Honestly, people don't care, genitals vary lots and most of the time one night stands happen whilst you're both a bit tipsy and in the dark. I think the best thing for you is to just get out there and try not to worry about it. Being more anxious about these things typically occurs more as well when you're a virgin, and after a little bit of experience you won't know what all the fuss was about. Best of luck.
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becausethenight
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As said, these are really common, and it’s likely your partner wouldn’t even notice.

If you’re having sex with someone, you should trust them enough not to tell all their friends about your genitalia! It sounds like you’re catastrophising a bit - everyone has something unique/odd about their naked body, and a girl who cares about you either don’t mind, or will stick around for the explanation
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dennaj54
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I will tell you what will turn a girl off, thats repeatedly telling her about a problem thats only in your mind, as in this case. Your Doctor has already said its normal. If it really bothers you, have sex in a darkened room to begin with. After a few times, you will stop worrying.
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