The Student Room Group

Moving into student house with a girl I started seeing and am still in love with

Hi,I'm moving into my student house for my second year of university, with my group of friends at uni, who I lived with in first year student accommodation.
The only problem is is that, I began seeing one of these friends around
the start of December (approx the same time we all agreed to live together), which initially started with us sleeping together after a night out, and progressed quite quickly into something a lot closer to a relationship as we developed feelings for each other - I even travelled to her house over the Christmas period to see her.

Within a few months we began going on dates, and spending almost all of our time together - around the start of March she told me she loved me,and I realised I loved her too soon after (this is the first girl I've ever told I was in love with btw). I understand this all seems very fast but I suppose that was due to us living with and constantly being with each other. The only reason I didn't ask her to by my girlfriend at this point was because of the things I've heard about the problems of moving in with a gf/bf (even though we were already in pretty deep anyway).

Then lockdown happened... During the first month or so we were great, we'd call, facetime and tell each other how much we love each other pretty much every day.
Things then became a bit ropey, with us beginning to fall out quite regularly which started with me wanting a bit of space from facetiming every day (something I now regret) and everything kind of just got worse from there with us becoming quite uncivil towards each other.

We ended up agreeing to take a break for a few weeks on quite bad terms, which was around the middle of June, but every time I've tried talking to her she's been quite distant, and seemed like she isn't sure whether she wants to start seeing each other again, so we haven't properly spoke for nearly two months - I wasn't really sure what to do as I've never been in a relationship before so thought giving her space was a good idea.

It's now August and I'm very anxious about moving into the house and seeing her as I'm fairly sure she will ask if we can go back to being friends, which I will understand but I will be gutted as my feelings for her haven't changed, and if anything realised how much I want her in my life.
I also don't even want to think about the possibility of her dating another guy, or her bringing him to the house and I will probably end up just moving out if that happens, even though I don't really have many other friends at uni.

On the off chance she does want to give things another chance I would be so happy but I'm not even sure it would work out after everything that happened.

TLDR; started dating a friend I'd already agreed to move in with in second year, we fell in love with each other quite quickly, things went south during lockdown and we agreed to take a break which lasted longer than I intended, still have to move in with her and not sure what to do.

Thanks in advance x
And this kids is why we don't **** where we eat.
Original post by UnwantedKid
And this kids is why we don't **** where we eat.

what does the stars say lol
I can see it being difficult. I think you should assume the relationship will not be re-kindled. Not easy I know but perhaps you should prepare yourself for this.
Original post by Psychstudent789
Hi,I'm moving into my student house for my second year of university, with my group of friends at uni, who I lived with in first year student accommodation.
The only problem is is that, I began seeing one of these friends around
the start of December (approx the same time we all agreed to live together), which initially started with us sleeping together after a night out, and progressed quite quickly into something a lot closer to a relationship as we developed feelings for each other - I even travelled to her house over the Christmas period to see her.

Within a few months we began going on dates, and spending almost all of our time together - around the start of March she told me she loved me,and I realised I loved her too soon after (this is the first girl I've ever told I was in love with btw). I understand this all seems very fast but I suppose that was due to us living with and constantly being with each other. The only reason I didn't ask her to by my girlfriend at this point was because of the things I've heard about the problems of moving in with a gf/bf (even though we were already in pretty deep anyway).

Then lockdown happened... During the first month or so we were great, we'd call, facetime and tell each other how much we love each other pretty much every day.
Things then became a bit ropey, with us beginning to fall out quite regularly which started with me wanting a bit of space from facetiming every day (something I now regret) and everything kind of just got worse from there with us becoming quite uncivil towards each other.

We ended up agreeing to take a break for a few weeks on quite bad terms, which was around the middle of June, but every time I've tried talking to her she's been quite distant, and seemed like she isn't sure whether she wants to start seeing each other again, so we haven't properly spoke for nearly two months - I wasn't really sure what to do as I've never been in a relationship before so thought giving her space was a good idea.

It's now August and I'm very anxious about moving into the house and seeing her as I'm fairly sure she will ask if we can go back to being friends, which I will understand but I will be gutted as my feelings for her haven't changed, and if anything realised how much I want her in my life.
I also don't even want to think about the possibility of her dating another guy, or her bringing him to the house and I will probably end up just moving out if that happens, even though I don't really have many other friends at uni.

On the off chance she does want to give things another chance I would be so happy but I'm not even sure it would work out after everything that happened.

TLDR; started dating a friend I'd already agreed to move in with in second year, we fell in love with each other quite quickly, things went south during lockdown and we agreed to take a break which lasted longer than I intended, still have to move in with her and not sure what to do.

Thanks in advance x

You arent suited. You argue to distraction and neither of you pull back.
If she has split fully, then clearly she will date someone else, you dont own her.
The best you can hope for is you just get along without masses of emo and drama.
If she isnt willing to listen she isnt getting back to you.
She knows where you are so leave it at that without the drama or you are going to disrupt the house for the whole year and probably your studies as well.
Yeesh, I'd start looking for somewhere else, or bury all those feelings right quick. none of your housemates are going to welcome this drama stinking the place up.

Young couples/splits in houseshares = bad.
(edited 3 years ago)
Don't move in with her it will be a disaster waiting to happen my friend was gonna do the same thing but they had a break cuz of lockdown and soon after she was seeing someone else
Reply 7
Perhaps it can rekindle, but I think sharing a house with a uni love interest is fraught with risk. To be honest if you can I would try to move in to a property with the lads and take it from there. You’ll be much better off if it doesn’t work out.
I got one worse a couple I knew she broke up with him over lockdown after they planned to live together after lockdown he moved in the house with her but she didn't tell him that she was with guy who she was sleeping with who was moving in the house with them

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