my other half keeps coming up reasons why he doesn't want me to go a physical uni

I am wanting to go on to another course at a physical uni after I finish my current one that I am doing at the open university, but my other half keeps telling me that shouldn't even thou the extra course will get me closer to becoming a social worker. He says that he doesn't want the benefits to stop.

Reply 1

claireestelle

Original post by Anonymous

is he doing anything to contribute to the household income himself or has a very good reason he can't?

Reply 2

Surnia

Doesn't sound like he's interested in seeing you achieve your ambitions and better yourself, in which case is it really just the money or does he think he'll be left behind? What does he currently do, what could he do?

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by claireestelle

is he doing anything to contribute to the household income himself or has a very good reason he can't?

we both get benefits, but he doesn't want to work as he prefers being at home all the time. I've offered to take on a part-time job on top of uni but he prefers having money from the benefits. he also keeps telling me to get sick notes so that I don't work as well.

Reply 4

claireestelle

Original post by Anonymous

he doesn't sound supportive at all, do you want to stay with him as it seems you're trying to make things better for yourself and he has no intention of going anywhere with his life.

Reply 5

Surnia

Original post by Anonymous

So he's lazy, dishonest and unsupportive. What more is needed to tell you to give him the world's biggest kick up the backside, to either stop being a scrounger or to get out as you're finishing with him.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

we get into arguments every time I mention it, but the only thing stopping me is that he starts crying if I give a choice and mentions that our daughter shouldn't live in a broken family

Reply 7

claireestelle

Original post by Anonymous

we get into arguments every time I mention it, but the only thing stopping me is that he starts crying if I give a choice and mentions that our daughter shouldn't live in a broken family

your daughter is better off with someone who wants to get somewhere in life than with someone who has no intention of improving things for her.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by claireestelle

your daughter is better off with someone who wants to get somewhere in life than with someone who has no intention of improving things for her.

shes currently with his parents as they have custody

Reply 9

claireestelle

Original post by Anonymous

shes currently with his parents as they have custody

showing your trying to get in a better place, could be better for your situation than staying with him, perhaps get some legal advice but staying on benefits won't get you towards a better future.

Reply 10

Surnia

Original post by Anonymous

we get into arguments every time I mention it, but the only thing stopping me is that he starts crying if I give a choice and mentions that our daughter shouldn't live in a broken family

And he resorts to emotional blackmail and guilt-tripping you as well! Why can't he work?

Reply 11

Clubcard

This guy sounds like such a loser.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

And he resorts to emotional blackmail and guilt-tripping you as well! Why can't he work?

he has been on benefits since he was 18 and he's now 26. I am 19. now and then he gets sick notes from the doctor for depression like I do. he doesn't take his medication and when he's not getting sick notes, he lies about looking for work to get money.