My parents won't let me move out for uni?

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Anonymous #1
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I feel so confused and sad. I want to move out for uni but my parents won't let me. I have very strict Arab parents and they think I'm abandoning them and embarrassing them by moving out. I want to move out and live a uni life and make friends but they won't let me. I also love them a lot and don't want them to hate me but I know i will regret it if i commute. Please what do I do? How do i convince them to let me move out? Also all my older cousins are commuting so I will be seen as a disobedient person if i move out by my distant family also. What do I do?
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Muttley79
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel so confused and sad. I want to move out for uni but my parents won't let me. I have very strict Arab parents and they think I'm abandoning them and embarrassing them by moving out. I want to move out and live a uni life and make friends but they won't let me. I also love them a lot and don't want them to hate me but I know i will regret it if i commute. Please what do I do? How do i convince them to let me move out? Also all my older cousins are commuting so I will be seen as a disobedient person if i move out by my distant family also. What do I do?
Commuting is highly risky at the moment - why risk more contacts when you don't have to? It's much easier to access the library nearer the uni - this is your degree ...
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RogerOxon
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel so confused and sad. I want to move out for uni but my parents won't let me. I have very strict Arab parents and they think I'm abandoning them and embarrassing them by moving out. I want to move out and live a uni life and make friends but they won't let me. I also love them a lot and don't want them to hate me but I know i will regret it if i commute. Please what do I do? How do i convince them to let me move out? Also all my older cousins are commuting so I will be seen as a disobedient person if i move out by my distant family also. What do I do?
I'm sorry that your parents are making this so difficult. IMO, going away to university is a major step in adulthood.

If you're 18, they can't stop you. However, they may not pay what student finance assumes that they will, and there are the relationship issues. Can you argue that you have to move for the best university that you can get?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by RogerOxon)
I'm sorry that your parents are making this so difficult. IMO, going away to university is a major step in adulthood.

If you're 18, they can't stop you. However, they may not pay what student finance assumes that they will, and there are the relationship issues. Can you argue that you have to move for the best university that you can get?
Maybe im not sure. Im not 18 yet. Im really scared because I don't want to lose them and for us to disown eachother but i dont want to waste and regret my life
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999tigger
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel so confused and sad. I want to move out for uni but my parents won't let me. I have very strict Arab parents and they think I'm abandoning them and embarrassing them by moving out. I want to move out and live a uni life and make friends but they won't let me. I also love them a lot and don't want them to hate me but I know i will regret it if i commute. Please what do I do? How do i convince them to let me move out? Also all my older cousins are commuting so I will be seen as a disobedient person if i move out by my distant family also. What do I do?
Good to see they are so open minded.
Dont go to a uni you dont wnat to.
Apply to the unis you want in 2021.
Decline the place if they wont let you go.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Maybe im not sure. Im not 18 yet. Im really scared because I don't want to lose them and for us to disown eachother but i dont want to waste and regret my life
I totally understand. I couldnt move out for uni and had to go to a london Uni. I just had to accept it and wait a little longer. When I finsih my degree i want to move out for my masters or get a job outside london. They probably allow me if I say I got an internship outside london
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Anonymous #1
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Does anyone know what i can say for them to let me move out?
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel so confused and sad. I want to move out for uni but my parents won't let me. I have very strict Arab parents and they think I'm abandoning them and embarrassing them by moving out. I want to move out and live a uni life and make friends but they won't let me. I also love them a lot and don't want them to hate me but I know i will regret it if i commute. Please what do I do? How do i convince them to let me move out? Also all my older cousins are commuting so I will be seen as a disobedient person if i move out by my distant family also. What do I do?
When would you be starting?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
When would you be starting?
2021
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Fredericks1
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While I do think that you should have more independance if you are 18, why would you want to move out if you can help it? you save so much money by living at home (also, most lectures will be virtual this coming year so it makes even less sense to move out!) financially you will be much better off.

imo you should just get through these 3 years at uni and then you can move wherever you want after you are done.

Best of luck!
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Ne en mia nomo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Does anyone know what i can say for them to let me move out?
That you are the person who will choose the care home for them when they will be old and vulnerable, so they'd better be nice to you.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Fredericks1)
While I do think that you should have more independance if you are 18, why would you want to move out if you can help it? you save so much money by living at home (also, most lectures will be virtual this coming year so it makes even less sense to move out!) financially you will be much better off.

imo you should just get through these 3 years at uni and then you can move wherever you want after you are done.

Best of luck!
I want to live the uni life, make friends, have privacy since my parents control all aspects of my life, and be independent.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ZR246)
That you are the person who will choose the care home for them when they will be old and vulnerable, so they'd better be nice to you.
Theyre kinda already old and vunerable. My dad is 65 and my mum is 52 and im 17
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AB_student_7
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Hi OP,

It might be worth applying to further away Universities that are not commutable and telling your parents that you prefer those unis- worth a shot!
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
2021
(Original post by Anonymous)
Theyre kinda already old and vunerable. My dad is 65 and my mum is 52 and im 17
Anon, 52 isn't old.

If you are hoping to go to University next year, there is a possibility that accommodation will be offered as normal. You should give proper consideration to taking a room.

A good compromise for you might be to apply for a place which isn't a long way from where you live. I don't mean to turn down something which is ideal but, say, do Medicine at Manchester if you live in Leicester, rather than somewhere in the South-West or Scotland.

Which subject appeals to you and in which region do you live?
Last edited by Kerzen; 4 months ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by AB_student_7)
Hi OP,

It might be worth applying to further away Universities that are not commutable and telling your parents that you prefer those unis- worth a shot!
Thanks i really hope this works
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Anon, 52 isn't old.

If you are hoping to go to University next year, there is a possibility that accommodation will be offered as normal. You should give proper consideration to taking a room.

A good compromise for you might be to apply for a place which isn't a long way from where you live. I don't mean to turn down something which is ideal but, say, do Medicine at Manchester if you live in Leicester, rather than somewhere in the South-West or Scotland.

Which subject appeals to you and in which region do you live?
I live in Manchester. i want to do economics or accounting.

Btw can you get accommodation yet visit your parents every two days etc??
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Ne en mia nomo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Theyre kinda already old and vunerable. My dad is 65 and my mum is 52 and im 17
They can make your life harder, but they can't stop you from moving out if that's what you really want Tbf it's kind of ridiculous that they want to disown you because of your choice of uni. They might be angry for a while but I don't think it will last. Explain to them why you want to go there, what's the accommodation like, maybe get in touch with people of the same origin who went to that uni, ask their opinion. People are more afraid of the unknown, show to your parents that there's nothing to be worried about.
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I live in Manchester. i want to do economics or accounting.

Btw can you get accommodation yet visit your parents every two days etc??
To be honest, you don't want to be in a situation where you are at Uni and going home every two days. You will end up missing out on so much and it might harm your chances of making new friends.

I'm trying to think of where would be good for economics/accounting.

Obviously, London would be good ...... Birmingham perhaps.
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Does anyone know what i can say for them to let me move out?
I totally understand you but if you are starting in 2021 then you have some time to convince them. Just take it slow and kinda make them trust you essentially. Talk about how it will negatively affect your studies ( they'll hate that happening lol)
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