Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
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My mum is planning me a party with a few friends... I’m very introverted and have told her many times that I really don’t like parties including recently when she discussed the idea with me. Another thing is I wouldn’t say my friends are going to be the kind I keep for life. I’m going into year 11 and we’ve been friends since year 7 so I think we’re really just sticking as a group because it’s easier in the last year instead of finding new groups and stuff. They’re all nice but I think we all have an unspoken mutual understanding that we’re not going to stay very close after the last year. My mum is the opposite of me and loves parties but I really can’t imagine anything worse. It’s meant to be a surprise so I’m not exactly sure what’s going to happen but I think it’s going to be a barbecue with music. I think she’s inviting some of her friends too who I’ve grown up with like “aunties” and their kids. I’m not really looking forward to it at all tbh. Am I being ungrateful? What should I do? Should I ask to cancel (she probably wouldn’t though)
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Em1845
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My mum is planning me a party with a few friends... I’m very introverted and have told her many times that I really don’t like parties including recently when she discussed the idea with me. Another thing is I wouldn’t say my friends are going to be the kind I keep for life. I’m going into year 11 and we’ve been friends since year 7 so I think we’re really just sticking as a group because it’s easier in the last year instead of finding new groups and stuff. They’re all nice but I think we all have an unspoken mutual understanding that we’re not going to stay very close after the last year. My mum is the opposite of me and loves parties but I really can’t imagine anything worse. It’s meant to be a surprise so I’m not exactly sure what’s going to happen but I think it’s going to be a barbecue with music. I think she’s inviting some of her friends too who I’ve grown up with like “aunties” and their kids. I’m not really looking forward to it at all tbh. Am I being ungrateful? What should I do? Should I ask to cancel (she probably wouldn’t though)
Firstly, you are definitely not being ungrateful, I know exactly how you feel!
When I was in year 11 I was in literally the same position with my friendship group (I'm in year 12 now), I was introverted and having a party would have been my absolute worst nightmare. Have you sat down and had a conversation with your mum about why you don't want this party, try to tell her how bad the party would make you really feel and see if that has any affect. However, if this doesn't get through to her and the party has to go ahead, maybe tell your friends how you feel? You say you've been friends since year 7, I guess they know how introverted and quiet you are but maybe tell them that you're dreading the party and hopefully they'll understand and then you should feel a bit better. You could also ask them to not stay too long - it sounds a bit bad but I would do it!!
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AHKS
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My mum is planning me a party with a few friends... I’m very introverted and have told her many times that I really don’t like parties including recently when she discussed the idea with me. Another thing is I wouldn’t say my friends are going to be the kind I keep for life. I’m going into year 11 and we’ve been friends since year 7 so I think we’re really just sticking as a group because it’s easier in the last year instead of finding new groups and stuff. They’re all nice but I think we all have an unspoken mutual understanding that we’re not going to stay very close after the last year. My mum is the opposite of me and loves parties but I really can’t imagine anything worse. It’s meant to be a surprise so I’m not exactly sure what’s going to happen but I think it’s going to be a barbecue with music. I think she’s inviting some of her friends too who I’ve grown up with like “aunties” and their kids. I’m not really looking forward to it at all tbh. Am I being ungrateful? What should I do? Should I ask to cancel (she probably wouldn’t though)
This sounds like you think she is having the party for her more than you and wouldn't cancel it anyway. If that is true asking her to call it off isn't going to work. So you need to either go along and put up with it, or fake an illness the morning before, acknowledge it's too late to cancel and just shut yourself away in your bedroom with a book out of the way until it's all over.
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SoulfulTwist
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Just try to make the most of it. Introverted or not, everyone needs a good time, needs to socialise here and there, needs friends. Try and use this to your advantage. Have fun, forget focuaing on the fact that you didn't want this. Rather make the most of it. In life we sometimes let others do things we do not necessarily want to keep them happy, e.g. when you have a partner. Maybe they like to go out to restuarants with you and you like to take out and eat at home, but to keep them happy you do both and mix it up. And you make the most of it either way.
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