Should I break up?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 year ago
#1
So me and my girlfriend are barely able to see each other now (twice in the last 6-7 months) I have nothing wrong with her it’s just so hard not being able to see her regularly and won’t be able to for a very long time (till we finish uni) but I don’t think I’d be able to hold off. It hurts so much not being with her and every day it just upsets me that we’d have to wait months at a time before we can meet for a day until our circumstances get better. Any advice?
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So me and my girlfriend are barely able to see each other now (twice in the last 6-7 months) I have nothing wrong with her it’s just so hard not being able to see her regularly and won’t be able to for a very long time (till we finish uni) but I don’t think I’d be able to hold off. It hurts so much not being with her and every day it just upsets me that we’d have to wait months at a time before we can meet for a day until our circumstances get better. Any advice?
Stick it out. There is nothing wrong with her. Carry on. Things will get better.
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Nautilus
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#3
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Why can't you see her?
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tiaal
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How long is it until you both finish university?
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Surnia
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So why can't you be supportive of your girlfriend pursuing her dream.of a degree instead of making it all about you? She doesn't see you either, but you haven't said she's complaining about it.

You must have known you were both going to uni, so what, if any, circumstances have changed that you don't see each other often and that it's now a problem?
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Dunnig Kruger
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Make her and yourself free agents. By all means keep in touch with each other and see each other when you can - if you can both handle the other person being a free agent.

But above all - make yourselves both free agents.

There will be lots of wonderful people at your unis with whom each of you can have intimate relationships.

This is one of those times when the where is about as important as the who.
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username1339858_
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#7
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Why don't you both face time or get on with doing your normal stuff with facetime on e.g. study with it on so even if you are not together in person, you are virtually. It will ease the distance a bit and hopefully you can both set dates/weekends where you make sure to meet
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ROTL94
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Do you or her go to uniersity abroad? Why is it so hard to hop on a train and see her or for her to hop on a train and see you?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by mgi)
Stick it out. There is nothing wrong with her. Carry on. Things will get better.
Bad advice. If you don't think you can stick it out, I'd break up with her. I was in a similar position and I stuck it out and it was the worst mistake for both us. My best advice if explain the situation and break up
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cloudy.skies
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#10
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If you really loved her, you would stay with her. It’s rough not seeing your partner, that is understandable. But you say that you really like her, so why would you break up?

How is leaving her going to help? You’ll still not see each other, only now you’ll both be off with other people. If you really love her, it will hurt more to see her with other guys.

I’d stick it out.
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Anonymous #3
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End it if your heart isn't into it
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H3ARTBROK3N
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#12
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#12
Do whatever you want.
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Bad advice. If you don't think you can stick it out, I'd break up with her. I was in a similar position and I stuck it out and it was the worst mistake for both us. My best advice if explain the situation and break up
Why is it bad advice? Based on the implied assumption that your situation is similar or identical to the OP's? The OP said there is nothing wrong with her- they just don't see each other often enough- so why break up?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by mgi)
Why is it bad advice? Based on the implied assumption that your situation is similar or identical to the OP's? The OP said there is nothing wrong with her- they just don't see each other often enough- so why break up?
Yes OP says theres nothing wrong with her, but is rarely seeing her and probably unlikely to see her often in the future. He says that he thinks he won't be able to hold it off, which means he's struggling for it. It would make it easier for them to break up on good terms rather than potentially breaking up in bad terms. I was in pretty much the same scenario and I stuck with it and it was the worst decision I've made, so I would know.
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes OP says theres nothing wrong with her, but is rarely seeing her and probably unlikely to see her often in the future. He says that he thinks he won't be able to hold it off, which means he's struggling for it. It would make it easier for them to break up on good terms rather than potentially breaking up in bad terms. I was in pretty much the same scenario and I stuck with it and it was the worst decision I've made, so I would know.
Alternatively, he could bear with it until uni finishes. He gets on well with the girl, so why throw it all away. It is not an easy thing to find someone to be mutually caring!
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by mgi)
Alternatively, he could bear with it until uni finishes. He gets on well with the girl, so why throw it all away. It is not an easy thing to find someone to be mutually caring!
Again I'm just saying from my experience what happened. Read the full context he says he doesn't think he'll be able to hold it off, so no point making him uncomfortable in a situation he already is a5
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Geraldthegoat
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#17
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A lot of couples are finding it hard but in the mean time FaceTime as much as possible even possibly sleep on FaceTime so u feel closer to her. Watch movies on Netflix together, u can do that now from your own laptops etc and just message each other everyday. Don’t give up, this is a test and just try to make the most time as possible for each other.
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twinklelittlstar
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#18
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hey there! LDR's take a lot of work, and it's okay to love ur gf and miss her, and it's okay to break up because of convenience, and not coz of lack of love. u have to evaluate whether u feel that constant physical contact is a crucial part of the relationship, or whether u think those instances where u close the distance between u make up for the time apart. also, try videocalling more often, sending little gifts, getting a bond touch bracelet, etc. whatever u decide, it's up to u! sending hugs x
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