I'm confused

(Original post by Anonymous)
So sometimes my mind just confuses me like when I feel sad or any type of emotion that isn't happiness or anger I always feel like I'm lying to myself like "no it not feeling sad u just want attention" type of thing so I always feel bad to feel sad even when talking about negative experiences my friends opened up to me about being sexually assaulted at young ages so I decided to come out to them with one of the things that's happened to since I've been sexually assaulted twice but whilst I was saying it, it felt like I was lying and I just got really scared like what if they don't believe me cuz I told my brother about it aswell and he said I just made it up and how am I supposed to believe my word over his so I got really anxious when I said it like what if they think I'm just doing it for attention or trying to join in with something I'm not a part of that's why I kinda stopped myself from saying the 2nd one and it's just kind of uncomfortable when they bring it up like "childhood trauma really messed me up" and stuff cuz idk I feel weird especially since I don't think it affected me in anyway and it's more of a distant memory that is still irritably there anyway I just feel weird everytime I feel a certain way since my brain automatically thinks I'm doing or feeling anything for attention lol