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deferring a year or not.. ? advice needed

Going to uni with zero organisation skill, time management, or direction might set me up to fail or regret everything. But there's nothing to do in covid. I always liked the idea of taking a gap year, packing my bag and travelling by myself but that's not feasible this year. I guess I could travel around the UK. I have money saved up so finance isn't an issue. I've spoken to imperial and they've given me the option to defer ( this would calm my mind in case I decide I do want imperial). I just don't want to procrastinate anymore and I'm scared I'll still not know what to do. I already feel like a lazy sloth as it is. My ideal situation would be to take a year out to do work experience places till Jan, possibly travel and experience new things. As cheesiest as it sounds I have no sense of who I am. Maybe I could 'find myself'. I don't want to keep slogging through life with no sense of direction. This probably comes from years of thinking I'd be a doctor (mainly put into me by family) then realising i didn't like medicine. I attached too much of my personality as a kid to pleasing others saying I would be a doctor.
Idk how much of a relevant thing this is but also my grandma has dementia and no idea if she'd be alive next year. I'd like to visit her as this might be my last chance to do so. She lives in my home country which we are allowed to travel to. If I do go uni I may not be able to.
Tldr: is it stupid to take a gap year cos idk if I want to do the course or should I just try out the course at imperial.
Reply 1
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bestgtg
11
by the sound of it def take the gap year- it'll give u time to think things through. I didn't want to take one but ended up having to and I don't regret it one bit.
Also medicine is such an INTENSE course- if ur heart isn't 110% in it don't do it.
Reply 2
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yanon
OP
2
Original post by bestgtg
by the sound of it def take the gap year- it'll give u time to think things through. I didn't want to take one but ended up having to and I don't regret it one bit.
Also medicine is such an INTENSE course- if ur heart isn't 110% in it don't do it.

Hiya, its not for medicine its for chemistry. i feel lost at what my interest are in general since ive never taken the time to explore them. having been applying for jobs for a month now i feel really dejected as to what id do during my gap year. i think i just feel guilty having not done much in the quarantine due to my anxiety. im worried i might regret the gap year as i have nothing confirmed. i know what i want to do but all my plans could be ruined be second lockdown. i feel like i should just go for imperial cos i have nothing better to do but i know i wouldnt be happy going there yet.

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