People don't want to be friends with me because I don't drink

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Anonymous #1
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So i'm 22 and people rarely want to be friends with me or just generally spend time with me because i don't drink alcohol. This is a personal choice for me and i'm at an age where i don't feel bad or self-conscious about this, i just feel annoyed. Everyone judges me heavily for my choice and are very vocal with their opinions, and i would just like to say that i in no way judge them for drinking, i used to drink a lot when i was pretty young and then i just got over it and i got bored of that being the constant focus of everyones lives, though i do understand the appeal, ( but this is not the only reason i don't drink). I am given advice sometimes from older people i know who say 'oh you will find other people who don't really like to drink or who just respect your decision', and it feels like i will never actually meet them because literally everyone around me, whether that be at uni, work or general life tend to revolve so much of their lives around drinking. Honestly, i'm not sure if i'm asking a question here or not, i just want people's opinions i guess??
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Pathway
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Are you vocal about not drinking? I don't drink, none of my friends care (some do drink, some don't). My friends at university didn't either. I know loads of people who don't drink.
Last edited by Pathway; 1 month ago
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Parziva1
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I don't drink.

I don't get why people judge other people either

I bet they're just jealous that you have control over your life and they don't
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Pathway)
Are you vocal about not drinking? I don't drink, none of my friends care (some do drink, some don't). My friend at university didn't either. I know loads of people who don't drink.
I mean i don't flaunt it, but when asked about it i tell them, and when they ask why i just say that it's not my thing.
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Ziggy_Mercury
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So i'm 22 and people rarely want to be friends with me or just generally spend time with me because i don't drink alcohol. This is a personal choice for me and i'm at an age where i don't feel bad or self-conscious about this, i just feel annoyed. Everyone judges me heavily for my choice and are very vocal with their opinions, and i would just like to say that i in no way judge them for drinking, i used to drink a lot when i was pretty young and then i just got over it and i got bored of that being the constant focus of everyones lives, though i do understand the appeal, ( but this is not the only reason i don't drink). I am given advice sometimes from older people i know who say 'oh you will find other people who don't really like to drink or who just respect your decision', and it feels like i will never actually meet them because literally everyone around me, whether that be at uni, work or general life tend to revolve so much of their lives around drinking. Honestly, i'm not sure if i'm asking a question here or not, i just want people's opinions i guess??
I completely get you! I'm 19 and I'm bored of drinking too. Which isn't really helpful when most of uni life revolves around drinking and getting blackout drunk. If you want my opinion, people who are outright being rude and judgemental towards you just because don't like to destroy your liver every weekend aren't worth your time.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Parziva1)
I don't drink.

I don't get why people judge other people either

I bet they're just jealous that you have control over your life and they don't
A part of me thinks that it's a generation thing? but i occasionally experience it with people older than me, maybe it's a society thing?
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Pathway
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I mean i don't flaunt it, but when asked about it i tell them, and when they ask why i just say that it's not my thing.
That's bizarre. I wouldn't pay it much attention, if that's their reason for not being your friend then, well...it just shows that they're superficial and it likely wouldn't be a long-term friend ship either.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Ziggy_Mercury)
I completely get you! I'm 19 and I'm bored of drinking too. Which isn't really helpful when most of uni life revolves around drinking and getting blackout drunk. If you want my opinion, people who are outright being rude and judgemental towards you just because don't like to destroy your liver every weekend aren't worth your time.
I knooow, uni puts on soo much pressure, i kind of feel left out when people talk about it but then i remember how much money some of them spend on drinking every weekend when they get blackout drunk.
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Parziva1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
A part of me thinks that it's a generation thing? but i occasionally experience it with people older than me, maybe it's a society thing?
Most people drink because they think by doing so, they believe it will make them 'forget problems' or to 'pretend to be cool' but when reality slaps them on their face, the only thing laughing is their bank balance and or the state of their health.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Parziva1)
Most people drink because they think by doing so, they will believe it will make them 'forget problems' or to 'pretend to be cool' but when reality slaps them on their face, the only thing laughing is their bank balance and or the state of their health.
yeah fair, i think most of the people who are my age drink because they think it makes them look cool (i mean, i dont know some of their personal lives so it could be to forget problems) because the vibe i get from them is that they are trying to boast about it i think? not sure really
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Ziggy_Mercury
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I knooow, uni puts on soo much pressure, i kind of feel left out when people talk about it but then i remember how much money some of them spend on drinking every weekend when they get blackout drunk.
imo there's not really anything in it for you when you get drunk. It makes you act like a tw*t, makes you forget EVERYTHING and then you feel vile the next day. Personally I rather get high than drunk but obviously that's not an alternative for everyone, which is completely fine btw! At the end of the day just do what makes you happy and comfortable, regardless of what other people think
Last edited by Ziggy_Mercury; 1 month ago
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999tigger
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So i'm 22 and people rarely want to be friends with me or just generally spend time with me because i don't drink alcohol. This is a personal choice for me and i'm at an age where i don't feel bad or self-conscious about this, i just feel annoyed. Everyone judges me heavily for my choice and are very vocal with their opinions, and i would just like to say that i in no way judge them for drinking, i used to drink a lot when i was pretty young and then i just got over it and i got bored of that being the constant focus of everyones lives, though i do understand the appeal, ( but this is not the only reason i don't drink). I am given advice sometimes from older people i know who say 'oh you will find other people who don't really like to drink or who just respect your decision', and it feels like i will never actually meet them because literally everyone around me, whether that be at uni, work or general life tend to revolve so much of their lives around drinking. Honestly, i'm not sure if i'm asking a question here or not, i just want people's opinions i guess??
I doubt that is the defining reason. I would think 50% of people dont drink alcohol at uni or are very light drinkers.
Theres no problem going to the pub or bar for the social aspect and having a soft drink.
If that doesnt appeal then why not make friends in a way that doesnt involve alcohol by a club or society?
As so many people do not drink at uni, then you may be being overly sensitive, when in fact you should just smile and ignore it whilst looking for friends in different ways. I highly doubt its just about the drink and you need to readjust and rethink.
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Parziva1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
yeah fair, i think most of the people who are my age drink because they think it makes them look cool (i mean, i dont know some of their personal lives so it could be to forget problems) because the vibe i get from them is that they are trying to boast about it i think? not sure really
If they're trying to boast about it, then most likely they want you to join in with their bad habits, I would recommend staying away from them and sticking with your choice (not drinking), it may be difficult because of the pressure, but know you are more stronger (and more healthy) than them.

You will 100% find more friends that don't drink or respect your choices

Stay safe + Healthy
Last edited by Parziva1; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Ziggy_Mercury)
imo there's not really anything in it for you when you get drunk. It makes you act like a tw*t, makes you forget EVERYTHING and then you feel vile the next day. Personally I rather get high than drunk but obviously that's not an alternative for everyone, which is completely fine btw! At the end of the day just do what makes you happy and comfortable, regardless of what other people think
Yeah i don't really understand it, i don't understand the getting high either but that is my personal preference, each to their own.
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Kerzen
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I've read articles on several occasions over the last couple of years which say that current research is showing a fall in young people drinking. I'm not sure whether the research has shown why this might be, but I know that it's a clear trend. I'm sure I read at one point that manufacturers of alcohol were becoming concerned about how to keep their customer base stable when the young people they expected to start drinking show no interest in doing so.

I think that about a third of young adults don't drink now.

Other articles I have read suggest that drinking has increased amongst older women.

https://www.nhs.uk/news/lifestyle-an...leisure%20time.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Parziva1)
If they're trying to boast about it, then most likely they want you to join in with their bad habits, I would recommend staying away from them and sticking with your choice (not drinking), it may be difficult because of the pressure, but know you are more stronger (and more healthy) than them.

Stay safe + Healthy
well those ones with bad habits are literally all around me haha, i really don't feel any pressure and i don't think i'd ever do it because others pressured me into it (there are people that try), i'm just a bit annoyed is all. Also, health is one of the main reasons too, (though not the only one). Thanks for the reply.
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onceuponatime1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So i'm 22 and people rarely want to be friends with me or just generally spend time with me because i don't drink alcohol. This is a personal choice for me and i'm at an age where i don't feel bad or self-conscious about this, i just feel annoyed. Everyone judges me heavily for my choice and are very vocal with their opinions, and i would just like to say that i in no way judge them for drinking, i used to drink a lot when i was pretty young and then i just got over it and i got bored of that being the constant focus of everyones lives, though i do understand the appeal, ( but this is not the only reason i don't drink). I am given advice sometimes from older people i know who say 'oh you will find other people who don't really like to drink or who just respect your decision', and it feels like i will never actually meet them because literally everyone around me, whether that be at uni, work or general life tend to revolve so much of their lives around drinking. Honestly, i'm not sure if i'm asking a question here or not, i just want people's opinions i guess??
Drinking is a phenomenon that I will never be able to fathom. Why would anyone put themselves in a position where they reduce their capability to think rationally? There is a reason why so many accidents, ranging from bar fights to rapes and murders, happen when under the influence of alcohol. Some people in this society are completely washed and finished. Drinking is not beneficial to your health. Period. It should never have been a thing, along with smoking. Do not drink. It is better to have no friends, which is me in this case, than people who influence you to make immoral and irrational decisions.
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Parziva1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
well those ones with bad habits are literally all around me haha, i really don't feel any pressure and i don't think i'd ever do it because others pressured me into it (there are people that try), i'm just a bit annoyed is all. Also, health is one of the main reasons too, (though not the only one). Thanks for the reply.
No problem, take care
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Kerzen)
I've read articles on several occasions over the last couple of years which say that current research is showing a fall in young people drinking. I'm not sure whether the research has shown why this might be, but I know that it's a clear trend. I'm sure I read at one point that manufacturers of alcohol were becoming concerned about how to keep their customer base stable when the young people they expected to start drinking show no interest in doing so.

I think that about a third of young adults don't drink now.

Other articles I have read suggest that drinking has increased amongst older women.

https://www.nhs.uk/news/lifestyle-an...leisure%20time.
Well i hope so, but it isn't like that in my general area. but thanks for the reply.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by onceuponatime1)
Drinking is a phenomenon that I will never be able to fathom. Why would anyone put themselves in a position where they reduce their capability to think rationally? There is a reason why so many accidents, ranging from bar fights to rapes and murders, happen when under the influence of alcohol. Some people in this society are completely washed and finished. Drinking is not beneficial to your health. Period. It should never have been a thing, along with smoking. Do not drink. It is better to have no friends, which is me in this case, than people who influence you to make immoral and irrational decisions.
Same!! This is another of the major reasons i try to stay away from it, i had a few accidents when i did drink as a teenager but my main fear is being taken advantage of honestly. Thanks for the reply.
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