Should I go for the girl or the friend?

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Anonymous #1
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So I'm 17, have never really been in a relationship before out of my own choice - even though I am aware of my good looks and I am doing my final year of a levels and last valentines day before quarantine my dream girl asked me to be her. -I was incredibly shocked as usually boys ask girls but she asked me. Also this girl has a boyfriend who I am extremely good friends with since 5 years old and by me stealing his girl I think our friendship will be hindered
I can't get this girl off my mind but at the same time i value my friendship with her current boyfriend
WHAT DO I DO ??????????? - thanks
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Anonymous #1
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please somebody answer I need help


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JustOneMoreThing
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I doubt you want help, you probably came here to have people tell you it's okay and that you should go for her.

Fact is she knows you're friends with her boyfriend so that doesn't bode well for her personality if she's willing to do that.

On top of that she's really winning over you which tells me you aren't very bright or loyal, you've succumbed to her manipulation.
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Vapordave
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So, you're considering whether to help the girl you like cheat on your best friend?
It will damage or even destroy your friendship.
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pepsimaxcherry
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Are you seriously asking this question?

Do not do it.

You’re going to ruin a relationship. Look at it this way - she is willing to cheat on her boyfriend for you. That means she’d also be willing to cheat on you for someone else.

You’re going to ruin a relationship for a girl who’s just going to cheat on you.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Vapordave)
So, you're considering whether to help the girl you like cheat on your best friend?
It will damage or even destroy your friendship.
Yeh so this girl i have liked for 5 years and I just find her irresistible and the fact she told me she would cheat on her boyfriend for me puts me in an even bigger hole so im really confused what to do -
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by pepsimaxcherry)
Are you seriously asking this question?

Do not do it.

You’re going to ruin a relationship. Look at it this way - she is willing to cheat on her boyfriend for you. That means she’d also be willing to cheat on you for someone else.

You’re going to ruin a relationship for a girl who’s just going to cheat on you.
I think even though it is a posibliity it would be unlikely she would cheat on me though as she would openly flirt with me and in front of her boyfriend - she even told me "I would never cheat on you as I'm in mad love with you" so I'm really stuck
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Vapordave
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeh so this girl i have liked for 5 years and I just find her irresistible and the fact she told me she would cheat on her boyfriend for me puts me in an even bigger hole so im really confused what to do -
Plenty more fish in the sea.
Also pepsimax is right. You don't want to date a cheater because when she gets bored she'll move onto the next guy without having the courtesy to break up with you.
If you value your friendship don't even think about it.
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Vapordave
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I think even though it is a posibliity it would be unlikely she would cheat on me though as she would openly flirt with me and in front of her boyfriend - she even told me "I would never cheat on you as I'm in mad love with you" so I'm really stuck
If you're stuck you're a horrible friend.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Vapordave)
Plenty more fish in the sea.
Also pepsimax is right. You don't want to date a cheater because when she gets bored she'll move onto the next guy without having the courtesy to break up with you.
If you value your friendship don't even think about it.
but should I at least let her know my feelings for her or should I just blank her completely
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So I'm 17, have never really been in a relationship before out of my own choice - even though I am aware of my good looks and I am doing my final year of a levels and last valentines day before quarantine my dream girl asked me to be her. -I was incredibly shocked as usually boys ask girls but she asked me. Also this girl has a boyfriend who I am extremely good friends with since 5 years old and by me stealing his girl I think our friendship will be hindered
I can't get this girl off my mind but at the same time i value my friendship with her current boyfriend
WHAT DO I DO ??????????? - thanks
If she's still dating your friend reject her. Remember the saying. Bros over Hoes. If she dumps your friend or something then after like a month or two ask him if he still has feelings for her and if you can try get with her or not. So basically what you should do is:
1. Say to the girl I don't want to ruin my friendship and I'm not gonna be part of a relationship where I'm cheating with my friends girl
2. If she says that she will dump her boyfriend who's your friend then once she does say to her that you don't know
3. Then go to your friend after a few weeks has gone by and ask him if he'd be fine with you going for her
4. He probably will be fine since most of us guys don't care tbh but if he isn't fine then don't go for her but if he's fine then go for the girl.

All I can say is Bros always before girls. Girls come and go but friends are for life. Don't ruin your friendship to get with a girl who could easily cheat on you too. Instead make sure your friend is happy regardless before you make a move.
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Vapordave
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(Original post by Anonymous)
but should I at least let her know my feelings for her or should I just blank her completely
Never reveal your feelings to someone in a relationship.
If you can't stop using the brain down there then blank her and tell your friend that she's a cheater.
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tiaal
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I think even though it is a posibliity it would be unlikely she would cheat on me though as she would openly flirt with me and in front of her boyfriend - she even told me "I would never cheat on you as I'm in mad love with you" so I'm really stuck
She probably says that exact quote to her current boyfriend too.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tiaal)
She probably says that exact quote to her current boyfriend too.
that is not the case as they have been dating for 5 years since they were 13
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
but should I at least let her know my feelings for her or should I just blank her completely
I have two friends that are guys too who are both friends with eachother and they were in the exact same situation as you. Point is my friend who the girl wanted to cheat with rejected the girl until she was single. Then after a few weeks he asked his mate (my other friend) who was her ex if he was over her and if he could try go for her. And he was fine with it.

Point is just don't go for the girl if she's dating your friend. Tell her that you don't want to hurt your friend and that you'd only ever consider it if she became single and your friend was over her.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have two friends that are guys too who are both friends with eachother and they were in the exact same situation as you. Point is my friend who the girl wanted to cheat with rejected the girl until she was single. Then after a few weeks he asked his mate (my other friend) who was her ex if he was over her and if he could try go for her. And he was fine with it.

Point is just don't go for the girl if she's dating your friend. Tell her that you don't want to hurt your friend and that you'd only ever consider it if she became single and your friend was over her.
that may be the best thing to do or do you feel I should give it some time and then tell her that if you ever become single I would love to date you
it's just that ever since I spoke to her she was flirting with me and touching me and she made me feel so special and now I am addicted to her.
Unlike my friend and her, we are perfect for each other and even here friends say we should date
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Anonymous #1
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before I saw this girl, I said I would wait till uni for a girlfriend but when I see her, I can't control my emotions
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londonmyst
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No- avoid getting involved with the girl.

There's no point going behind your friend's back to hookup with his gf or trying to persuade her to dump him for you.
Nor getting involved in an open or polygamous relationship if that is what your friend is into.
Remember that people are creatures of habit and the girl won't suddenly become monogamous or decide to behave any better if she starts dating you.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by londonmyst)
No- avoid getting involved with the girl.

There's no point going behind your friend's back to hookup with his gf or trying to persuade her to dump him for you.
Nor getting involved in an open or polygamous relationship if that is what your friend is into.
Remember that people are creatures of habit and the girl won't suddenly become monogamous or decide to behave any better if she starts dating you.
do you think i should just wait till uni for a girlfriend? as if not her, there's not really any other girl I'm attracted to
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GabiAbi84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
do you think i should just wait till uni for a girlfriend? as if not her, there's not really any other girl I'm attracted to
Yes.

Forget about her-and also, if you’re any sort of friend you should tell your friend that she’s been saying this stuff to you.
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