My dad abuses me and my siblings

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Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
Hi, I’m 16 and I live with my 3 sisters with my Mom and Dad, we are all different ages my youngest sibling is 8.

My and our home life is very unstable and my Dad continually hits, and abuses us. He shouts all alongside punches me. He accuses me of being bad - when I’m not. We all live in fear and the only reason I like school is I feel safe?

I want to tell my school or social services but not sure how to tell them or if they will take me seriously? I just want some help
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glassalice
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#2
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They will take what's happening very seriously. It might help if you could safely get some evidence of this though. This is because they may have to take your dad to court.
Do you have a teacher that you feel like you could trust to talk about this with? Be aware that they will legally have to tell social services.
Do you have any other family members you could live with?
Hope you get things sorted, sorry your having such a tough time.
Last edited by glassalice; 3 weeks ago
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deadroseex
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Please speak to your school! They really truly do help as stupid as it sounds. You will always be taken seriously, especially in these situations.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by glassalice)
They will take what's happening very seriously. It might help if you could get evidence of this though. This is because they may have to take your dad to court.
Do you have any other family members you could live with?
Hi, I have 3 other sisters as I mentioned, we’re all of different ages, our Mom is just as bad as my Dad and I don’t trust her at all.

We have scars on our arms etc that are bad, my sister has some very awful marks on her body from abuse.

It’s horrific and it’s mentally scaring for all us ;(
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glassalice
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, I have 3 other sisters as I mentioned, we’re all of different ages, our Mom is just as bad as my Dad and I don’t trust her at all.

We have scars on our arms etc that are bad, my sister has some very awful marks on her body from abuse.

It’s horrific and it’s mentally scaring for all us ;(
Oh I am sorry, that sounds awful x

If you feel like you are at immediate risk, you could phone 999. It's not as scary as it sounds.
Do you have grandparents or uncles/ aunties?
Last edited by glassalice; 3 weeks ago
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curbyourfeminism
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, I’m 16 and I live with my 3 sisters with my Mom and Dad, we are all different ages my youngest sibling is 8.

My and our home life is very unstable and my Dad continually hits, and abuses us. He shouts all alongside punches me. He accuses me of being bad - when I’m not. We all live in fear and the only reason I like school is I feel safe?

I want to tell my school or social services but not sure how to tell them or if they will take me seriously? I just want some help
Are you and your mother financially dependent on your father? If so, that may complicate things, since your mother would have to look for work. Otherwise, if your mother works and earns enough money, then this process should be easier. You need to contact social services immediately. No one should be subject to domestic violence. I myself am going through this. I was sexually abused at the age of 6, and believe me, I can still remember the events as clear as day. It leaves a permanent scar in your brain, and it took me many therapy sessions to finally stop thinking about the terror I went through.

The school or social services will take you seriously. That is part of their job. Domestic violence is treated with the most amount of caution, and so they will handle the case correctly. Tell the school officer that you are being subject to domestic violence in the home from your dad. After that, he will make you write a statement, stating everything that you have gone through. Then, I believe the police may be involved. I am not sure what the procedure is, but I can reassure you that it is not scary.
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curbyourfeminism
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, I have 3 other sisters as I mentioned, we’re all of different ages, our Mom is just as bad as my Dad and I don’t trust her at all.

We have scars on our arms etc that are bad, my sister has some very awful marks on her body from abuse.

It’s horrific and it’s mentally scaring for all us ;(
Right, I did not know that it was your mother too. Right now, you have to call social services. Ask your sisters to slowly pack their things together, and most importantly, gather your identity forms and immediate belongings. If you have any relatives you can stay over at, contact them immediately. If you fear they will simply side with your parents, which they should not, but I can see why favouritism would be involved, see if you have any friends that would be fine in taking you in for a few nights. This is a very hard situation, given that you are 16 and not a legal adult yet, and so you cannot move into accommodation.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by glassalice)
Oh I am sorry, that sounds awful x

If you feel like you are at immediate risk, you could phone 999. It's not as scary as it sounds.
Do you have grandparents or uncles/ aunties?
Hi,
Yes, we do but they live a distance away from us, 30 miles so it’s really hard to see them.
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EPQ help xoxo
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#9
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, I’m 16 and I live with my 3 sisters with my Mom and Dad, we are all different ages my youngest sibling is 8.

My and our home life is very unstable and my Dad continually hits, and abuses us. He shouts all alongside punches me. He accuses me of being bad - when I’m not. We all live in fear and the only reason I like school is I feel safe?

I want to tell my school or social services but not sure how to tell them or if they will take me seriously? I just want some help
Tell your school immediately!! They will take you seriously as long as you're telling the truth. Make sure to tell the teacher who is head of pastoral care and any other member of staff you feel you can trust.
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Anonymous #2
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My sister once told the staff at my school about my dad hitting us, but it was a misunderstanding - he lightly hits us as a joke but the school took this VERY seriously and contacted social services. I had to clear up this misunderstanding which was frustrating. So yes, your school will be serious about this. Please do tell them or someone, not doing so will cost you your mental health and self esteem.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by curbyourfeminism)
Are you and your mother financially dependent on your father? If so, that may complicate things, since your mother would have to look for work. Otherwise, if your mother works and earns enough money, then this process should be easier. You need to contact social services immediately. No one should be subject to domestic violence. I myself am going through this. I was sexually abused at the age of 6, and believe me, I can still remember the events as clear as day. It leaves a permanent scar in your brain, and it took me many therapy sessions to finally stop thinking about the terror I went through.

The school or social services will take you seriously. That is part of their job. Domestic violence is treated with the most amount of caution, and so they will handle the case correctly. Tell the school officer that you are being subject to domestic violence in the home from your dad. After that, he will make you write a statement, stating everything that you have gone through. Then, I believe the police may be involved. I am not sure what the procedure is, but I can reassure you that it is not scary.
Hi,

My mom abuses us also, especially when she is drunk, she can get aggressive quickly and it’s scary, my sisters often cry themselves to sleep because of it - it’s that bad. My dad threatens me if I tell social services about all this - that’s why I’m so scared.
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glassalice
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi,
Yes, we do but they live a distance away from us, 30 miles so it’s really hard to see them.
Social services maybe able to arrange for you to live with them.
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curbyourfeminism
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi,

My mom abuses us also, especially when she is drunk, she can get aggressive quickly and it’s scary, my sisters often cry themselves to sleep because of it - it’s that bad. My dad threatens me if I tell social services about all this - that’s why I’m so scared.
Right. Once the police arrive at your door, your father cannot do anything, or else he will be arrested on the spot. Give yourself and your sisters time to pack your immediate things. In this case, make sure they have access to their passports and any other forms of identity. This is if you wish to move into social services, who I am sure will be fine with providing you a home. Do you have any relatives that can help? Their distance does not matter, so as long as they side with you and not them. If your relatives can stay over while your mother and father are detained, this will help drastically.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by curbyourfeminism)
Right, I did not know that it was your mother too. Right now, you have to call social services. Ask your sisters to slowly pack their things together, and most importantly, gather your identity forms and immediate belongings. If you have any reyou can stay over at, contact them immediately. If you fear they will simply side with your parents, which they should not, but I can see why favouritism would be involved, see if you have any friends that would be fine in taking you in for a few nights. This is a very hard situation, given that you are 16 and not a legal adult yet, and so you cannot move into accommodation.
Hi, How do I contact social services? I don’t want my parents to hear me calling them? It will make them worse.
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Medi-cry
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, How do I contact social services? I don’t want my parents to hear me calling them? It will make them worse.
can you do it in school tomorrow?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by curbyourfeminism)
Right, I did not know that it was your mother too. Right now, you have to call social services. Ask your sisters to slowly pack their things together, and most importantly, gather your identity forms and immediate belongings. If you have any relatives you can stay over at, contact them immediately. If you fear they will simply side with your parents, which they should not, but I can see why favouritism would be involved, see if you have any friends that would be fine in taking you in for a few nights. This is a very hard situation, given that you are 16 and not a legal adult yet, and so you cannot move into accommodation.
(Original post by curbyourfeminism)
Right. Once the police arrive at your door, your father cannot do anything, or else he will be arrested on the spot. Give yourself and your sisters time to pack your immediate things. In this case, make sure they have access to their passports and any other forms of identity. This is if you wish to move into social services, who I am sure will be fine with providing you a home. Do you have any relatives that can help? Their distance does not matter, so as long as they side with you and not them. If your relatives can stay over while your mother and father are detained, this will help drastically.
Hi, Yes we have relatives however they live about a hour away from us.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Medi-cry)
can you do it in school tomorrow?
Yes, I guess I could
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glassalice
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, How do I contact social services? I don’t want my parents to hear me calling them? It will make them worse.
https://www.childline.org.uk/get-sup...unsellor-chat/

Childline will call emergency services for you. Please don't worry- you aren't wasting anyones time.
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curbyourfeminism
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi, How do I contact social services? I don’t want my parents to hear me calling them? It will make them worse.
Social services has departments in each area. Type in social services and then your area on a search engine, and you should find their details. On the website, they may have a live chat function, so that will help too. Hmm, call them when your parents are out? If your mother and father work, then call them at that time. Also, call them while you are at school. After school, why not stay in the school, or in fact, just talk to your school officer. He or she can actually call them then and there. Perfect plan! You meet two authorities at the same time. Your school officer will contact social services and the police if necessary, and the school officer can help with housing too. Plus, this will all happen after school or even during school if you want, and so your parents will not know.

:-)
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by curbyourfeminism)
Social services has departments in each area. Type in social services and then your area on a search engine, and you should find their details. On the website, they may have a live chat function, so that will help too. Hmm, call them when your parents are out? If your mother and father work, then call them at that time. Also, call them while you are at school. After school, why not stay in the school, or in fact, just talk to your school officer. He or she can actually call them then and there. Perfect plan! You meet two authorities at the same time. Your school officer will contact social services and the police if necessary, and the school officer can help with housing too. Plus, this will all happen after school or even during school if you want, and so your parents will not know.

:-)
Hi, that seems like the best option, so will we be put into foster care? Will we get separated?
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