Anonymous #1
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#1
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
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Dughacks
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In college, the only reason why I made friends with a person in my class was that we went to the same basketball club after afterschool otherwise we would have just been acquaintances. IMO there is no harm in just hitting him/her up and just asking as you both have something in common.
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Scottishlad888
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
PM that person maybe they are lonely and a bit shy and could be 110 % happier to be friends with you and you wont come of creepy give it a try and see how things gow
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Dughacks)
In college, the only reason why I made friends with a person in my class was that we went to the same basketball club after afterschool otherwise we would have just been acquaintances. IMO there is no harm in just hitting him/her up and just asking as you both have something in common.
yeah i guess you’re right. i might have to try it and see. out of interest, how did you actually start being friends? like did you speak to them in basketball club or class?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Scottishlad888)
PM that person maybe they are lonely and a bit shy and could be 110 % happier to be friends with you and you wont come of creepy give it a try and see how things gow
thanks. this kinda changed my thinking on it.
they seem like they might be a more confident person than me but you’re right that it’s worth a shot.
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Dughacks
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(Original post by Anonymous)
yeah i guess you’re right. i might have to try it and see. out of interest, how did you actually start being friends? like did you speak to them in basketball club or class?
well during the first week or two we barely spoke to each other lmao but once basketball practice started we both noticed each other (this part will entirely depend on the person's personality) and he approached me and we started to talk. We found out we had free periods at the same time and even go home on the same bus. This was a year and a bit ago and during that time I met his friends and he met my friends and our group has stayed relatively close since.
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Scottishlad888
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(Original post by Anonymous)
thanks. this kinda changed my thinking on it.
they seem like they might be a more confident person than me but you’re right that it’s worth a shot.
Give it a shot you will both be around the same age good luck
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Dughacks)
well during the first week or two we barely spoke to each other lmao but once basketball practice started we both noticed each other (this part will entirely depend on the person's personality) and he approached me and we started to talk. We found out we had free periods at the same time and even go home on the same bus. This was a year and a bit ago and during that time I met his friends and he met my friends and our group has stayed relatively close since.
ah that’s such a nice coincidence!
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Losttheplot
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Definitely ask, they may be feeling the same as you. For me smiling when I meet people shows you are approachable, if you stand there looking scared and shy, even if thats how you feel inside, people can be a bit worried about talking to you in case you ignore them, so try to come across cheery and say hi when in a face to face situation. Please speak to your parents if you are struggling, might be worth going home for a short time to be amongst family. Take care, good luck xx
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Losttheplot)
Definitely ask, they may be feeling the same as you. For me smiling when I meet people shows you are approachable, if you stand there looking scared and shy, even if thats how you feel inside, people can be a bit worried about talking to you in case you ignore them, so try to come across cheery and say hi when in a face to face situation. Please speak to your parents if you are struggling, might be worth going home for a short time to be amongst family. Take care, good luck xx
thanks i like your advice about the looking approachable as i find myself slipping into old habits of looking petrified :/ i’ve definitely been speaking to them throughout all of this. thank you!
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University of Bradford
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
Hey!

Have you had chance to speak to anyone at the club you're involved in? With you sharing that same interest as them that can be a nice way to start conversation. Messaging them would be great, you could also try speaking to them first in person when the club team meets, and then message them afterwards

Have you thought about becoming a student ambassador, undergoing any volunteering opportunities or finding a part-time job on campus? All fab ways of meeting new people!

I wish you the best of luck,

Becky
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by University of Bradford)
Hey!

Have you had chance to speak to anyone at the club you're involved in? With you sharing that same interest as them that can be a nice way to start conversation. Messaging them would be great, you could also try speaking to them first in person when the club team meets, and then message them afterwards

Have you thought about becoming a student ambassador, undergoing any volunteering opportunities or finding a part-time job on campus? All fab ways of meeting new people!

I wish you the best of luck,

Becky
yeah i’m contemplating doing some volunteering and getting involved in some leadership stuff for societies! i’ve briefly spoken to like a different person because it seems most come in groups and are in the years above. i’ll definitely look into more student roles as those seem fun. thanks
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University of Portsmouth Student Rep
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
Hi!

The message that person, give it a shot!! You never know you might become good friends with that individual

I would recommend joining societies and being active in all university groupchats!

I met a few people through freshers and accommodation groupchats!

Marlena - Official Student Rep
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curiousperson123
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
Which uni?
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Oxford Brookes University
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i started uni a couple weeks ago and have yet to make any friends. basically, i realised one person in a large group chat i’m in goes to the same club i do. i’m debating whether to privately message that person to ask if we should go together but i don’t want to sound like a creep or too pushy, especially since we don’t know each other (and i fear the rejection or being left on read.)
what do you think i should do?

plus, do you have any tips for making friends. even one friend would make me 110% happier than i am now
Hello,

Hope you are doing well!

I completely understand how you must be feeling, especially with the current situation everything is different and it is harder to socialise. However there are some ways that I would recommend, which can be used to socialise safely. I would say you should private message them, in my experience that is a great way to make friends. If they do not reciprocate then that is fine as well, I am sure that you will be able to make friends soon; sometimes it is just the case of being pro active and initiating conversation.

You seem to have already joined group chats which is one of the ways I would recommend the most. Societies are a great way for you to be able to get to know people with similar interests to you, have a look at the social media pages for any societies you may be interested in joining; they may be holding events (many societies at my university have been holding virtual events). The priority at the moment should be to keep yourself safe, so do try your best to socialise but do so in a safe manner.

Just know that you are not alone and that there are many other students feeling the same way as you. If you have any questions, please do feel free to ask. I would be more than happy to help.

All the best,

Shaf
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by University of Portsmouth Student Rep)
Hi!

The message that person, give it a shot!! You never know you might become good friends with that individual

I would recommend joining societies and being active in all university groupchats!

I met a few people through freshers and accommodation groupchats!

Marlena - Official Student Rep
i definitely like the societies idea. the ones i do now help me keep sane and i’ll probably join more
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by curiousperson123)
Which uni?
not gonna say exactly but its in the south
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Oxford Brookes University)
Hello,

Hope you are doing well!

I completely understand how you must be feeling, especially with the current situation everything is different and it is harder to socialise. However there are some ways that I would recommend, which can be used to socialise safely. I would say you should private message them, in my experience that is a great way to make friends. If they do not reciprocate then that is fine as well, I am sure that you will be able to make friends soon; sometimes it is just the case of being pro active and initiating conversation.

You seem to have already joined group chats which is one of the ways I would recommend the most. Societies are a great way for you to be able to get to know people with similar interests to you, have a look at the social media pages for any societies you may be interested in joining; they may be holding events (many societies at my university have been holding virtual events). The priority at the moment should be to keep yourself safe, so do try your best to socialise but do so in a safe manner.

Just know that you are not alone and that there are many other students feeling the same way as you. If you have any questions, please do feel free to ask. I would be more than happy to help.

All the best,

Shaf
thanks. i hope i find those who are in the same situation as me 😅
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Oxford Brookes University
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(Original post by Anonymous)
thanks. i hope i find those who are in the same situation as me 😅
Don't worry about it! Stay positive and I am sure you will

All the best,

Shaf
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