(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ An aesthetic kinda lifestyle ♥

I don't think anyone has ever said that it's any good and most people have trouble reading it.

I suck ass no wonder I'm so annoying

Bruh your handwriting is cool af it's perfect for aesthetic of history

About time you realised but I'm glad you've finally realised

It's good enough that I automatically hate you.

Edit: hate you more.

omg so neat! That looks so good spud!

I do not compute does that mean it's good?

I hate you too

Thank youuuu

Bruh your handwriting is cool af it's perfect for aesthetic of history

im a lowlife and insane

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ My Life ♥

So I'm gonna talk about a few things here.
Im gonna be honest - Im not okay. I cry nearly every day due to the pain of my IBS and then my head is always helping and Im always thinking im a disappointment and im always sad and wanting to cry all the time. Then I feel like I pray all the time for others yet I get nothing in return like everyone has turned on me and that Im being kind and nice for what? to get shouted at 24/7 and to have people staring at me all the time and me feeling insecure and the voices in my head put me down so much and my anxiety is just making me worried 24/7 and then my insomnia makes me lose sleep and honestly I feel like my life is messed up. Then im always fake smiling making sure everyone else is happy but what about me? im not half the time I just want to bang my head against a wall and cry but at least the people around me are happy why should my feelings matter?
honestly idk if im even okay anymore -I didn't come onto here for sympathy im sorry if I sound like im coming here for sympathy cus im really not I just needed somewhere to spill my thoughts and feelings.

another thing I've ditched my life - no waking up at 3:30 am and doing basketball and stuff. My insomnia is getting worse so I've decided to stop overworking myself and stuff and with me and myself I don't feel like in a state where I can do loads of stuff all the time so I've ditched my extremely overworked lifestyle.
another thing, so many people might get mad at me for this. So I said last Sunday I would audition for the drama production and tomorrow is the last day to audition and I still haven't auditioned. I know I know I said I would but I still don't know if I should. Like I want to but idk something is holding me back - I've been feeling so sad and in pain all week so ig that may be the thing that's holding me back from auditioning. Im having second thoughts on auditioning - like I can sing and act well (looking at my grades in drama I get top grades so im good at acting and in singing I've been singing since age 2 so im good at singing and acting) but idk if I should audition - I need some honest opinions pls.

*sigh Im sorry guys usually Im very happy and cheery and telling everyone positive things but im at a state where I just can't focus and concentrate and hate myself. I just hate life and at school, I cry literally every second and even if I tell people nothing gets fixed its like a war with me that I cant win - im sorry this sounds os depressing and I shouldn't be sharing sad things like this - im sorry I bet all of u are gonna be annoyed for me sharing such sad stuff instead of my usual happy thoughts - sorry guys.

Right now im just listening to NF - his songs relate to me so much especially Let you down and Hate myself - literally these 2 songs reach out to me so much honestly make me cry more but literally relate to me so much.

Anyways that's the end of the update hehe.
Sorry if this has made u upset or anything I just needed to let out some stuff.
imma end on a nice note and say hope u have a great rest of the week guys,
Zara x

@jellybellyb Late like always

Zaraaaa. You don't need to feel bad for expressing how you feel. You should know by now that so many people adore you on TSR and we'll be here for you whenever you need it most. I hope things start looking up for you and remember to do whatever makes you feel better. If that means not auditioning, then so be it. What matters is your health and well-being. Hope things look up for you.

Excuse my lateness I'm alive. Soon I must die again.

yeh I'm a stupid, oven-obsessed rat and what about it?

I was switching my personality to go out and see my friends!

Thank u Jerry - this has helped a lot
I've got to go now but I'll speak to u tomorrow!
baiii x

That's a compliment you wet microwave take it. I will now demonstrate why it would look good.

Point proven good bye

awww no dont changeeee we like u as u are g xx

I'll be fine if I go back to the 19th century but what about now?