Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
Hi so I have been friends with this person for 15 years. For the past year I felt a distance between us even tho we used to do everything together. This person made other friends and I guess I felt some type of way because when I made outside friends I still included this person. I was there for this person more at some point but when I was going through depression this person was no where to be found. I confronted this this person , and they brushed over it like I was crazy. I started to backtrack because I was afraid of losing the friendship. Thanks to my other close friends I decided to remove this friend without any explanation. But now I can’t seem to move past the fact that the friendship is over. A part of me wishes I sent this person a message letting them now how they hurt me yn. Idk
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Enola.s
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi so I have been friends with this person for 15 years. For the past year I felt a distance between us even tho we used to do everything together. This person made other friends and I guess I felt some type of way because when I made outside friends I still included this person. I was there for this person more at some point but when I was going through depression this person was no where to be found. I confronted this this person , and they brushed over it like I was crazy. I started to backtrack because I was afraid of losing the friendship. Thanks to my other close friends I decided to remove this friend without any explanation. But now I can’t seem to move past the fact that the friendship is over. A part of me wishes I sent this person a message letting them now how they hurt me yn. Idk
Hi
I suggest you have proper conversation with your friend, and explain why you have ended the friendship or better try to fix it.
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bebsbobs
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#3
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for closure purposes you might want to have that conversation with them. But you have to be ready for their response no matter what it is. They may completely dismiss your feelings and you have to be okay with that, because if not, that will just open more holes and you will have to reprocess everything yet again.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by bebsbobs)
for closure purposes you might want to have that conversation with them. But you have to be ready for their response no matter what it is. They may completely dismiss your feelings and you have to be okay with that, because if not, that will just open more holes and you will have to reprocess everything yet again.
the issue with this is, i removed this person from all forms of social media. i can message them with their number. but idk, its abit embarrassing now to text them a long paragraph. idk why i am overthinking this and this hurt about what happened. thanks for the response
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bebsbobs
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#5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
the issue with this is, i removed this person from all forms of social media. i can message them with their number. but idk, its a bit embarrassing now to text them a long paragraph. idk why i am overthinking this and this hurt about what happened. thanks for the response
i completely understand, it could be that you're not ready to face them just yet, so you shouldn't feel pressured to do so either. Take your time and message them if and when you're ready.
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cherlloydfan1
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#6
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hey, I think that u should try and make up with them if u miss them. Have they tried to get in touch with u since u fell out?
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Anonymous #1
#7
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
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(Original post by bebsbobs)
i completely understand, it could be that you're not ready to face them just yet, so you shouldn't feel pressured to do so either. Take your time and message them if and when you're ready.
This person never even reached out to me after I removed them. So to message them even tho they never reached out .... it’s just ... I’m shocked I guess.
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BoyestWor
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#8
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Somefriend

(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi so I have been friends with this person for 15 years. For the past year I felt a distance between us even tho we used to do everything together. This person made other friends and I guess I felt some type of way because when I made outside friends I still included this person. I was there for this person more at some point but when I was going through depression this person was no where to be found. I confronted this this person , and they brushed over it like I was crazy. I started to backtrack because I was afraid of losing the friendship. Thanks to my other close friends I decided to remove this friend without any explanation. But now I can’t seem to move past the fact that the friendship is over. A part of me wishes I sent this person a message letting them now how they hurt me yn. Idk
Sometimes we really form friendship outside our main ones but that doesn't mean you have to remove or forget the old ones you have. Maybe you're just the type of friend who values communication so much and the need to be in their life constantly. Me and my best friend, we have other friends and groups, we don't talk everyday (Weeks, or months) but when we do, the bond is still there. I suggest you talk to your friend dearly and be honest with how you feel.
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
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(Original post by BoyestWor)
Somefriend


Sometimes we really form friendship outside our main ones but that doesn't mean you have to remove or forget the old ones you have. Maybe you're just the type of friend who values communication so much and the need to be in their life constantly. Me and my best friend, we have other friends and groups, we don't talk everyday (Weeks, or months) but when we do, the bond is still there. I suggest you talk to your friend dearly and be honest with how you feel.
yeah a part of me wants to reach out and let them know how they have deeply hurt me. i feel like if i spoke to this person they would not take me seriously or care. also this person never reached out when i removed them.... so its like if they didnt care then why would they care now?
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
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(Original post by cherlloydfan1)
hey, I think that u should try and make up with them if u miss them. Have they tried to get in touch with u since u fell out?
no this person has not reached out at all.
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bebsbobs
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This person never even reached out to me after I removed them. So to message them even tho they never reached out .... it’s just ... I’m shocked I guess.
yeah i see that. You expect more from a relationship that has lasted so long, and it doesn't feel right that they just disappeared like that, and have not noticed or maybe reacted to you cutting them off.

I dont know much about them but they might be doing this because they're not mentally well. They could just simply be retreating and distancing themselves, and closing everyone off. I guess for you to know that you have to judge by their actions, but that of course requires you to "watch" said actions which takes time and effort, and you shouldn't feel obligated to do so either.

It could also just be that they're a bad and toxic friend. In that case the cold cut off was the absolutely right thing to do, and you're just grieving over the loss of a 15yo relationship.

Its completely understandable that you feel this way, because it is an unpleasant situation, and i'm sure part of you wishes that things were different. But at this stage i do think you just need either closure or time for healing. I think, take some time to consider what you want to happen and then see where that takes you. Maybe you can only start healing once you get closure? Or maybe you need to heal before you open up the door in hopes of getting closure. A lot to think about, and again i truly feel for you. I care deeply for the people around me and would be greatly affected by something like this too.
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