My partners belief in conspiracies is ruining our relationship

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Anonymous #1
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I've been with my partner for 5 years and he's always looked into conspiracy theories when odd events have happened around the world. Back then he would look, explain what he's found and a few days later forget about them and carry on with life. I never took much notice at first. But since June he's been looking into tons of theories around Covid and he's got to the point where he thinks Bill Gates is going to put chips into the vaccine that will control what we can and can't do further than the governments are doing now.

I've told him he is getting paranoid but that got into a full blown argument because I'm 'bowing' down to the government and following all their rules and I'm not standing up against my human rights. He said that all the people following the governments advice like 'sheep' are the paranoid ones and he's 'sane' and can see what's really happening.

I don't believe everything the MSM throws and some of the stuff he looks into and tells me makes some sense but I am trying my hardest to continue with my life as normally as I can and he's told me he's putting his life on hold. He works from home as a freelancer but since July he's not bothered finding any new clients and it's gotten to a point where he is only earning £200 a month and is now living off his savings but he only has £2000 left and he's saying he can make that last quite a few months if I am willing to contribute more. All he does lately is play video games and look at conspiracy theories whilst I'm trying my hardest to work and save so we can get a mortgage. Before all this he was so passionate in his career and I believed that he would do so well in years to come but I feel like I'm looking after a child!

I need him to snap out of whatever he is going through but I can't tell him what to do!
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Admit-One
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I've been with my partner for 5 years and he's always looked into conspiracy theories when odd events have happened around the world. Back then he would look, explain what he's found and a few days later forget about them and carry on with life. I never took much notice at first. But since June he's been looking into tons of theories around Covid and he's got to the point where he thinks Bill Gates is going to put chips into the vaccine that will control what we can and can't do further than the governments are doing now.

I've told him he is getting paranoid but that got into a full blown argument because I'm 'bowing' down to the government and following all their rules and I'm not standing up against my human rights. He said that all the people following the governments advice like 'sheep' are the paranoid ones and he's 'sane' and can see what's really happening.

I don't believe everything the MSM throws and some of the stuff he looks into and tells me makes some sense but I am trying my hardest to continue with my life as normally as I can and he's told me he's putting his life on hold. He works from home as a freelancer but since July he's not bothered finding any new clients and it's gotten to a point where he is only earning £200 a month and is now living off his savings but he only has £2000 left and he's saying he can make that last quite a few months if I am willing to contribute more. All he does lately is play video games and look at conspiracy theories whilst I'm trying my hardest to work and save so we can get a mortgage. Before all this he was so passionate in his career and I believed that he would do so well in years to come but I feel like I'm looking after a child!

I need him to snap out of whatever he is going through but I can't tell him what to do!
I would google articles about "how to talk to family members who are into QAnon". e.g.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/lisette...racy-theories/

https://www.engadget.com/

John Oliver also had a very good segment recently on the same topic, you might be able to find it online. I think most of it centres around talking to the person about their concerns, rather than dismissing all the theories as nonsense, (which they are).

However I think you seriously need to consider whether to continue the relationship if they're not contributing financially or or otherwise. As you said, your job isn't to mother someone.
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harrysbar
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I've been with my partner for 5 years and he's always looked into conspiracy theories when odd events have happened around the world. Back then he would look, explain what he's found and a few days later forget about them and carry on with life. I never took much notice at first. But since June he's been looking into tons of theories around Covid and he's got to the point where he thinks Bill Gates is going to put chips into the vaccine that will control what we can and can't do further than the governments are doing now.

I've told him he is getting paranoid but that got into a full blown argument because I'm 'bowing' down to the government and following all their rules and I'm not standing up against my human rights. He said that all the people following the governments advice like 'sheep' are the paranoid ones and he's 'sane' and can see what's really happening.

I don't believe everything the MSM throws and some of the stuff he looks into and tells me makes some sense but I am trying my hardest to continue with my life as normally as I can and he's told me he's putting his life on hold. He works from home as a freelancer but since July he's not bothered finding any new clients and it's gotten to a point where he is only earning £200 a month and is now living off his savings but he only has £2000 left and he's saying he can make that last quite a few months if I am willing to contribute more. All he does lately is play video games and look at conspiracy theories whilst I'm trying my hardest to work and save so we can get a mortgage. Before all this he was so passionate in his career and I believed that he would do so well in years to come but I feel like I'm looking after a child!

I need him to snap out of whatever he is going through but I can't tell him what to do!
Do you really want to be tied to someone like this for life?

I would walk away from the relationship and be grateful you dodged a bullet not buying a place with him. If he became single I expect he would soon understand the need to put more effort into real life again
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