overweight

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samantha joseph
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so i have been gaining quite some weight since the past year , my belly is out and i actually look 8/9 weeks pregnant and fat around back and theighs , honestly this is because i have been sitting on my bed the majority of the time about 70% of the day i am on my bed , i eat whenever i like and then come sit and also sit just after i eat , lately my mum has been telling me to get some excersise done and be fit she says you do no physical work you eat whenever you like without any control and sit immediately this will lead to health concerns considering you are only 19 and you have no medical reason at your age you should be healthy active and have a balanced body thats healthier and looks a bit more attractive . is it okay for her to tell me off or tell to loose weight and be pissed that i am not active and go for walks or should no one have the right ? (my school isnt far so she tells me to go by walk she has spoken about my weight and losing it both nicely and in a angry way?)
i hear how influences and bloggers and article talk about appreciating every body type i am just confused because i feel like my mum genuinely aint wrong so what is the internet all about that then? when i hear the social media saying and praising overweight then i get so confused and angry at my mum for me to loose but what she says legit sounds logical rather than hate and not understanding the 2 approaches confused me alot
thanks guys
Last edited by samantha joseph; 1 month ago
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learner38
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Tbh there’s nothing with being big I’m technically overweight even though I don’t look it. But there’s a point where your health is important. Losing weight shouldnt be because you want to fit into beauty standards it should be because you want to be healthier. If you want to (your choice) I can tell you healthy ways to lose weight. But do not feel bad for being big people who are big are beautiful as long as your healthy.
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14t
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(Original post by samantha joseph)
PLEASE READ
so i have been gaining quite some weight since the past year , my belly is out and i actually look 8/9 weeks pregnant and fat around back and theighs , honestly this is because i have been sitting on my bed the majority of the time about 70% of the day i am on my bed , i eat whenever i like and then come sit and also sit just after i eat , lately my mum has been telling me to get some excersise done and be fit she says you do no physical work you eat whenever you like without any control and sit immediately this will lead to health concerns considering you are only 19 and you have no medical reason at your age you should be healthy active and have a balanced body thats healthier and looks a bit more attractive . is it okay for her to tell me off or tell to loose weight and be pissed that i am not active and go for walks or should no one have the right ? (my school isnt far so she tells me to go by walk she has spoken about my weight and losing it both nicely and in a angry way?)
i hear how influences and bloggers and article talk about appreciating every body type i am just confused because i feel like my mum genuinely aint wrong so what is the internet all about that then? when i hear the social media saying and praising overweight then i get so confused and angry at my mum for me to loose but what she says legit sounds logical rather than hate and not understanding the 2 approaches confused me alot
thanks guys
First, can I ask how old you are? Just asking because at a certain age you really shouldn't worry about your weight at all unless you really need to due to health reasons as learner38 said. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a bit larger in fact the only reason being smaller is seen as our current beauty standard is because of capitalism, smaller body = less material needed to make clothes = increased profit. Sad but true and that is how our modern standard was developed. What really matters is how you feel, if you're happy with yourself (which I hope you are as I'm sure you're gorg!) then you have no reason to change regardless of what anyone else says.
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learner38
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(Original post by 14t)
First, can I ask how old you are? Just asking because at a certain age you really shouldn't worry about your weight at all unless you really need to due to health reasons as learner38 said. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a bit larger in fact the only reason being smaller is seen as our current beauty standard is because of capitalism, smaller body = less material needed to make clothes = increased profit. Sad but true and that is how our modern standard was developed. What really matters is how you feel, if you're happy with yourself (which I hope you are as I'm sure you're gorg!) then you have no reason to change regardless of what anyone else says.
Yes you put what I meant into such better words.
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samantha joseph
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(Original post by learner38)
Tbh there’s nothing with being big I’m technically overweight even though I don’t look it. But there’s a point where your health is important. Losing weight shouldnt be because you want to fit into beauty standards it should be because you want to be healthier. If you want to (your choice) I can tell you healthy ways to lose weight. But do not feel bad for being big people who are big are beautiful as long as your healthy.
no the thing is she nicely tells me aswell that it dosent look graceful ( even tho there is nothing wrong with being big but suppose you compare an overweight with some one who has maintained themselves and is more balanced then you will be attracted towards the one that is more maintained even tho it will be rude to say that the other girl looks fat for her mental health ) mum says you have no medical condition and other health issues and you are ruining both your health and appearance because you dont care and be lazy just eating sleeping whenever you want . she says without no reason you are giving other to talk about you even tho they shouldnt but because you have no medical issues , so she says whenever i tell you a nice thing to loose weight and be healthy you give me weird concepts of social media she says not everything promoted there is right and dont set your mind just based on what people say
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samantha joseph
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(Original post by 14t)
First, can I ask how old you are? Just asking because at a certain age you really shouldn't worry about your weight at all unless you really need to due to health reasons as learner38 said. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a bit larger in fact the only reason being smaller is seen as our current beauty standard is because of capitalism, smaller body = less material needed to make clothes = increased profit. Sad but true and that is how our modern standard was developed. What really matters is how you feel, if you're happy with yourself (which I hope you are as I'm sure you're gorg!) then you have no reason to change regardless of what anyone else says.
i am 19
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samantha joseph
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i am 19
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learner38
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(Original post by samantha joseph)
no the thing is she nicely tells me aswell that it dosent look graceful ( even tho there is nothing wrong with being big but suppose you compare an overweight with some one who has maintained themselves and is more balanced then you will be attracted towards the one that is more maintained even tho it will be rude to say that the other girl looks fat for her mental health ) mum says you have no medical condition and other health issues and you are ruining both your health and appearance because you dont care and be lazy just eating sleeping whenever you want . she says without no reason you are giving other to talk about you even tho they shouldnt but because you have no medical issues , so she says whenever i tell you a nice thing to loose weight and be healthy you give me weird concepts of social media she says not everything promoted there is right and dont set your mind just based on what people say
I’m sorry but ur mum is thinking from a bad viewpoint. It doesn’t matter whether your big or skinny you can still be bullied or feel insecure. It all depends on you whether you want to make tht change. There’s big people who are happily married a great support system soo clearly it’s something else. But it’s better to look through a health viewpoint. Your story sounds like what my cousin goes through but she suffers from a mental health problem her mum keeps talking about her weight eventhough she feels happier being bigger. All I’m saying is it’s YOUR life!
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Sinnoh
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Your mum is saying this with your best interests in mind. Yes there has been a growing movement in 'body positivity' but this does not change the fact that being overweight or obese has very well-established health risks.
'Body positivity' is more of a reaction towards unrealistic beauty standards seen in modern media. And it's true that these standards have had harmful effects of their own, like inadvertently encouraging anorexia or bulimia. But we shouldn't define 'realistic' as overweight either.
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samantha joseph
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(Original post by learner38)
I’m sorry but ur mum is thinking from a bad viewpoint. It doesn’t matter whether your big or skinny you can still be bullied or feel insecure. It all depends on you whether you want to make tht change. There’s big people who are happily married a great support system soo clearly it’s something else. But it’s better to look through a health viewpoint. Your story sounds like what my cousin goes through but she suffers from a mental health problem her mum keeps talking about her weight eventhough she feels happier being bigger. All I’m saying is it’s YOUR life
my mum says if you feel insecure then you wil change that she says that if its bullying and your mental health then get rid of the reason especially when its just because of laziness and my own cause like my own harm to my body . she says that get out walk daily leave your bed get active because the fat tubes everywhere dont look nice and isnt that true they do look unattractive compared to someone who doesnt have them , she dosnt say oh u have to have a really thin waste and very curvy no but to get rid f fat tubes and reduce thighs yes , even tho i will never make anyone feel low about themselves by calling them fat but if its a really close freind i will encourage them to be fit because saying they are okay may be harmful right. she says if i promote and tell you its okay its gonna result in obesity so i canot encourage that as that would be wrong . no dont be sorry i am not i am just confused because i see on social media everyone is promoting fatness obesity and what my mum says sounds logical too . i just dont know i feel happy both ways now because i dont have to put in the work because of gym and excersie and thinner because it looks better i guess
i dont have any mental conditions or helath problems
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samantha joseph
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(Original post by Sinnoh)
Your mum is saying this with your best interests in mind. Yes there has been a growing movement in 'body positivity' but this does not change the fact that being overweight or obese has very well-established health risks.
'Body positivity' is more of a reaction towards unrealistic beauty standards seen in modern media. And it's true that these standards have had harmful effects of their own, like inadvertently encouraging anorexia or bulimia. But we shouldn't define 'realistic' as overweight either.
hmmm do you agree that being curvy not unrealistic curvy tho looks more attractive as compared to someone quite overwight be honest tho . i feel like we should tell people who are overweight due to thier own medical reasons thats its okay and they are equally amazing so that it doesnt effect thier mental health aswell as physical health but dont make it okay to be overwieght for no reason like i am no medical issues but at the same time i dont wanna be a hypocrite too you get my problem
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learner38
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(Original post by samantha joseph)
my mum says if you feel insecure then you wil change that she says that if its bullying and your mental health then get rid of the reason especially when its just because of laziness and my own cause like my own harm to my body . she says that get out walk daily leave your bed get active because the fat tubes everywhere dont look nice and isnt that true they do look unattractive compared to someone who doesnt have them , she dosnt say oh u have to have a really thin waste and very curvy no but to get rid f fat tubes and reduce thighs yes , even tho i will never make anyone feel low about themselves by calling them fat but if its a really close freind i will encourage them to be fit because saying they are okay may be harmful right. she says if i promote and tell you its okay its gonna result in obesity so i canot encourage that as that would be wrong . no dont be sorry i am not i am just confused because i see on social media everyone is promoting fatness obesity and what my mum says sounds logical too . i just dont know i feel happy both ways now because i dont have to put in the work because of gym and excersie and thinner because it looks better i guess
i dont have any mental conditions or helath problems
Ok but that’s not a good way to get you to excercise. Take action because of your choice that’s what I’m saying. If you was to lose weight don’t go extreme and use supplements and stuff. You can even skip to lose weight. But lowkey saying “lazy” is quiet sad when there’s many skinny people that are lazy and are unhealthy and don’t get the same treatment so it’s all about the image thing again. Love yourself and do what you want to do. You are 19 soo. I hope you get what I’m trying to say being big doesn’t equate being ugly being skinny doesn’t equate being pretty . Even overweight people are pretty the difference is health imagine all those people with food disorders who don’t eat but yet deemed “pretty” because they fit societies standards plz take tht in mind.
Last edited by learner38; 1 month ago
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Sinnoh
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(Original post by samantha joseph)
hmmm do you agree that being curvy not unrealistic curvy tho looks more attractive as compared to someone quite overwight be honest tho . i feel like we should tell people who are overweight due to thier own medical reasons thats its okay and they are equally amazing so that it doesnt effect thier mental health aswell as physical health but dont make it okay to be overwieght for no reason like i am no medical issues but at the same time i dont wanna be a hypocrite too you get my problem
Yeah I have preferences, like everyone else
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Nutritionist
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Your mum is just looking out for you and is concerned about you. Body positivity or not, being overweight is unhealthy. Loving yourself for it doesn’t stop that. Anyone actively “promoting fatness” is either an idiot or trying to justify their own poor choices. There’ll be a few snowflakes who don’t want to hear this, but it’s simply a fact that being overweight causes health problems.
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