Trigger warning: Is it rape?

I am not victim blaming.

It is absolutely not her fault. I just don't understand putting yourself in a potentially dangerous situation.

TW: rape



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she never said yes. the second time she also didn’t say yes but he still did it. this is rape. telling people not to drink to prevent rape is extremely ignorant and stupid.

"He had no contraception or hadn't even asked my consent."

You have a voice don't you, you could have easily said no. Yeah I'm gonna be that person, Idgaf.

As for last night, no that wasn't rape. That was you being a drunk.

honestly if your not gonna be a dentist you can be a lawyer your so smart lol

loll thanks Goldie you’re smart too

TW: rape



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Don't feel ashamed firstly you've done nothing wrong.

However if in a court of law rape is so hard to prove guilty beyond reasonable doubt unless the defendant has admitted his guilt, that doesn't mean you can't report it. (his word against yours)

People above are right where they say no consent = rape, but you may have given him consent in your drunken state the previous night which you don't remember but he does.

I am not judge or jury, I am not a witness I wasn't there, I don't know if you give consent or not, but I will say if you feel raped then report it there are charities that can help.

If you don't want to report it I suggest you learn from this encounter not to drink so much to get your self in that state so in future you won't have have the same scenarios I.e waking up naked, feeling dirty, ashamed.

You can get 3 million replies to this thread however it's down to you how you feel.

If I was your friend, relative, or lawyer I'd strongly advise you to report it, HOWEVER as mentioned above it can take a while and it might not go anywhere in terms of reaching court, thrown out of court, lack of evidence.
I strongly suggest you take some advice from charities, parents, or colllege/university counselling if they have it.

loll thanks Goldie you’re smart too

Im logging off now til 1050PM cos im turning blocker on(sadly i need it cos i failed without it lol)

however maybe you could ask you Mummy if you can stay up that late

Ok that sounds good

Not the second bit though

No. You can NOT consent when you're drunk. Any 'consent' given is invalid.

Not true - in a court of law, consent can be given whilst drunk (R vs. Bree, (2007)) if they voluntarily drank substantual amounts of alcohol and were still still capable of agreeing to have sex at the time.
Not being able to remember giving consent =/= not being able to give consent at the time. These rape cases are sticky because you have to prove:

1. She did not or was not otherwise able to give consent at the time. Being drunk does not automatically invalidate personal agency as per the above.
2. He reasonably believed that she did not consent/could not give consent at the time. This is unsubstantiated as none of the facts she gave indicated either way.

If she decided to take this to court, in my opinion she would struggle to win the case, but then again I am not a lawyer.

“That” person that you’re being is the one appropriating rape culture. She did say no the night before because he didn’t have a condom firstly. Secondly, he didn’t even give her a chance to say no in the morning. Thirdly, and I cannot stress this one enough, if you are drunk, you absolutely cannot consent. He took advantage of her vulnerable state.

TW: rape



Moderation note: Please keep replies constructive and helpful to the OP. If you are wanting to debate, please post in the Debate and Current Affairs section, not in here.

If insults and arguments continue then this thread will be closed.

“That” person that you’re being is the one appropriating rape culture. She did say no the night before because he didn’t have a condom firstly. Secondly, he didn’t even give her a chance to say no in the morning. Thirdly, and I cannot stress this one enough, if you are drunk, you absolutely cannot consent. He took advantage of her vulnerable state.

And I've been looking at other comments. The people blaming her are disgusting. I'm trying to be empathetic and put myself in her shoes. I don't drink but I have terrible sleepwalking episodes. The last time, I fell asleep at a friend's house. He was able to get me to eat and start discussing our assignment all while I was sleeping. I woke up halfway, hunched over a book I couldn't remember opening. He even put a sweater and slippers on me and I didn't freaking know! He said he only suspected I was sleepwalking cause I was a little groggy and a few of my responses were incoherent. Imagine if it was someone desperately trying to get with me. I would wake up halfway through intimacy with a stranger! My gosh, that's just scary.

No consent=rape. I had a similar experience when I was roofied at a party by a couple ppl. I know how a lot of people consider this like a drunken night and oh a lil bit of fun but this is rape hun, no way else of saying it.