k.kk
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can someone please mark my answers,thank you!
English language paper 1 November 2018

Q2
How does the writer use language here to describe the Tyrannosaurus Rex? (8 marks)

In the extract the writer uses a range of literary devices to describe the Tyrannosaurus Rex,for example the writer tries to achieve a effect of danger when using the simile ‘a fence of teeth like daggers’’,daggers usually end to be associated with death and so when the writer shows a sense of similarity between the dinosaurs ‘’teeth’’ and the ‘’dagger’’ the writer is trying to emphasise the dinosaur is equivalent to a weapon and so can appear to be more than a threat to someone's life.

The writer's use of sentence structure makes the tyrannosaurus rex seem exhausting and tiring ,for example the writer's use of a long complex sentence ‘’It ran, its pelvic bones …………..settled its weight’’. This sentence shows how overwhelming the environment is due to the dinosaur being a threat. The long complex sentences are made out of numerous clauses,so much that it is difficult to read the sentence out loud without becoming out of breath,this outlines how Travis and the Time Safari transports clients are feeling.

The writer makes it feel as if the tyrannosaurus is new to the world so is still trying to adapt and figure out everything around him and so potentially can be seen as risky.The writer does this with the use a metaphor.for example it is said that the dinosaur ‘’might pick up and examine men like toys’’ the fact that it ‘’might’’ ,shows uncertainty ,the writer uses the word ‘’might’’ to give off an effect of uncertainty which gives a moral message that sometimes not knowing what could happen next is scarier than knowing what could happen next.when the the Tyrannosaurus rex is described as examining ‘men like toys’ it shows gives an image that the creature is just like a child.Examining ‘men like toys’ could also show the lack of empathy and emotions the dinosaur has and sees humans as worthless and that even if anything were to happen to them just like a toy at the shop there is always another one .

Q3
How has the writer structured the text to interest you as a reader?

The writer uses freytag's pyramid in order to grab the reader's attention.The writer focuses the reader's attention at the beginning of the source by introducing the setting and main characters (exposition).At the start of the extract we are introduced to the jungle and we learn that the ‘’The jungle was high and the jungle was broad’’,we also learn about the characters for example we learn that Eckels is extremely brave as he’s hunted many animals in the past and he calls the thing he is supposedly about to hunt ‘’now this’’.The writer structures the extract so that we don’t fully know what the ‘’this’’ is although it does seem to be a main character and then later makes a reveal to what the ‘’this’’ is,the writer probably structures the extract in this way so that there is a build up of tension,suspense and so that the main focus is on the main character.When there is finally a reveal there is ‘silence’ and ‘ A sound of thunder’ giving off a negative vibe in order to outline something negative is about to appear.

The writer's use of structure changes as the source develops to create a sense of chaos and turmoil, which reflects Travis’s mindset and is part of the rising action (Freytag’s pyramid). On line 16,the writer zooms in on the Tyrannosaurus rex’s legs,the writer describes them as ‘‘oiled,resilient,striding legs’’ the use of listing and zooming in gives the reader the feeling of moving towards the character and so emotionally engaging the reader with the story .Furthermore as the writer shifts its focus towards the end of the extract the problem unravels this is the falling action according to (Freytag's pyramid),the last line of the source is ‘’Like a stone idol, like a mountain avalanche, Tyrannosaurus fell’’,this simile helps give the reader a vivid sense of the effect being described.


The writer's use of structural devices such as short sentences and varied paragraph length confuses the reader. Each time before the writer zooms back in on the dinosaur the writer uses a short sentence to quiet the background where one of the characters uses quieting words such as ‘’shhh’’ or ‘’shut up’’.This makes the reader want to understand why everyone has to be quiet.



Q4
A student said,’This part of the story, where the men encounter the Tyrannosaurus Rex, shows Eckels is right to panic. The Monster is terrifying!’
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could: • consider your own impressions of Eckels’ reaction to the Tyrannosaurus Rex • evaluate how the writer describes the Monster • support your response with references to the text.
I strongly agree that Eckels is right to panic.Yes some may say he had a gun and so this could have been used to kill the ‘monster’ however the gun ‘’seemed like a toy gun’’according to Eckles in comparison to the ‘monster’,proving how big and tough the monster is .Eckles has clearly weighed the evidence and worked it out to be’’ impossible’’ to kill the ‘‘monster’’,however he is just exaggerating as a dinosaur can always be killed.In Eckles ‘’opinion’’ ,putting his mind into panic mode.The writer makes us feel as though we as readers would be in panic by the way the writer describes the Tyrannosaurus rex.For example when the writer uses the simile ‘’Its armoured flesh glittered like a thousand green coins’’.The writer compares the T-rex to a thousand green coins to make us imagine how big the T-rex and we start to feel intimidated ourselves ,so we as readers are feeling as if we with the actually with the characters experiencing what they are feeling and so making us understand the reason to why the characters and specifically Eckels is panicking.


When the Men encounter the Tyrannosaurus Rex,Eckels announces that it’’ wasn't like this before’’ portraying the fact that he has done this before so that means he has had the experience before,Eckles is the only character to announce that he has done this before giving an impression that he should be tougher and should have been prepared.Eckles is the only character showing a lot of fear and panic meaning the dinosaur isn't that extreme and Eckles is over exaggerating the situation.



The writer makes it look as if the monster is terrifying without even moving he states ‘’the monster itself did not move. It exhaled. The stink of raw flesh blew down the wilderness.’’,this use of exaggeration gives an effect on the reader by emphasising how even without moving the ‘’monster is terrifying’’
The writer explains that the monster will ‘’crush them like berries’’, this simile shows how powerful the dinosaur is and how meaningless humans are to the dinosaur,the dinosaur appears to be hungry as this isnt the only time there is an image portrayed of hunger an example of another time is when he is described to have a ‘’screaming throat’’,yes this could be an example of how angry he is but also ‘’screaming’’ could also shadow that his throat is ‘’screaming ‘’ because its hungry and needs food.
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Marissa01
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(Original post by k.kk)
can someone please mark my answers,thank you!
English language paper 1 November 2018

Q2
How does the writer use language here to describe the Tyrannosaurus Rex? (8 marks)

In the extract the writer uses a range of literary devices to describe the Tyrannosaurus Rex,for example the writer tries to achieve a effect of danger when using the simile ‘a fence of teeth like daggers’’,daggers usually end to be associated with death and so when the writer shows a sense of similarity between the dinosaurs ‘’teeth’’ and the ‘’dagger’’ the writer is trying to emphasise the dinosaur is equivalent to a weapon and so can appear to be more than a threat to someone's life.

The writer's use of sentence structure makes the tyrannosaurus rex seem exhausting and tiring ,for example the writer's use of a long complex sentence ‘’It ran, its pelvic bones …………..settled its weight’’. This sentence shows how overwhelming the environment is due to the dinosaur being a threat. The long complex sentences are made out of numerous clauses,so much that it is difficult to read the sentence out loud without becoming out of breath,this outlines how Travis and the Time Safari transports clients are feeling.

The writer makes it feel as if the tyrannosaurus is new to the world so is still trying to adapt and figure out everything around him and so potentially can be seen as risky.The writer does this with the use a metaphor.for example it is said that the dinosaur ‘’might pick up and examine men like toys’’ the fact that it ‘’might’’ ,shows uncertainty ,the writer uses the word ‘’might’’ to give off an effect of uncertainty which gives a moral message that sometimes not knowing what could happen next is scarier than knowing what could happen next.when the the Tyrannosaurus rex is described as examining ‘men like toys’ it shows gives an image that the creature is just like a child.Examining ‘men like toys’ could also show the lack of empathy and emotions the dinosaur has and sees humans as worthless and that even if anything were to happen to them just like a toy at the shop there is always another one .

Q3
How has the writer structured the text to interest you as a reader?

The writer uses freytag's pyramid in order to grab the reader's attention.The writer focuses the reader's attention at the beginning of the source by introducing the setting and main characters (exposition).At the start of the extract we are introduced to the jungle and we learn that the ‘’The jungle was high and the jungle was broad’’,we also learn about the characters for example we learn that Eckels is extremely brave as he’s hunted many animals in the past and he calls the thing he is supposedly about to hunt ‘’now this’’.The writer structures the extract so that we don’t fully know what the ‘’this’’ is although it does seem to be a main character and then later makes a reveal to what the ‘’this’’ is,the writer probably structures the extract in this way so that there is a build up of tension,suspense and so that the main focus is on the main character.When there is finally a reveal there is ‘silence’ and ‘ A sound of thunder’ giving off a negative vibe in order to outline something negative is about to appear.

The writer's use of structure changes as the source develops to create a sense of chaos and turmoil, which reflects Travis’s mindset and is part of the rising action (Freytag’s pyramid). On line 16,the writer zooms in on the Tyrannosaurus rex’s legs,the writer describes them as ‘‘oiled,resilient,striding legs’’ the use of listing and zooming in gives the reader the feeling of moving towards the character and so emotionally engaging the reader with the story .Furthermore as the writer shifts its focus towards the end of the extract the problem unravels this is the falling action according to (Freytag's pyramid),the last line of the source is ‘’Like a stone idol, like a mountain avalanche, Tyrannosaurus fell’’,this simile helps give the reader a vivid sense of the effect being described.


The writer's use of structural devices such as short sentences and varied paragraph length confuses the reader. Each time before the writer zooms back in on the dinosaur the writer uses a short sentence to quiet the background where one of the characters uses quieting words such as ‘’shhh’’ or ‘’shut up’’.This makes the reader want to understand why everyone has to be quiet.



Q4
A student said,’This part of the story, where the men encounter the Tyrannosaurus Rex, shows Eckels is right to panic. The Monster is terrifying!’
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could: • consider your own impressions of Eckels’ reaction to the Tyrannosaurus Rex • evaluate how the writer describes the Monster • support your response with references to the text.
I strongly agree that Eckels is right to panic.Yes some may say he had a gun and so this could have been used to kill the ‘monster’ however the gun ‘’seemed like a toy gun’’according to Eckles in comparison to the ‘monster’,proving how big and tough the monster is .Eckles has clearly weighed the evidence and worked it out to be’’ impossible’’ to kill the ‘‘monster’’,however he is just exaggerating as a dinosaur can always be killed.In Eckles ‘’opinion’’ ,putting his mind into panic mode.The writer makes us feel as though we as readers would be in panic by the way the writer describes the Tyrannosaurus rex.For example when the writer uses the simile ‘’Its armoured flesh glittered like a thousand green coins’’.The writer compares the T-rex to a thousand green coins to make us imagine how big the T-rex and we start to feel intimidated ourselves ,so we as readers are feeling as if we with the actually with the characters experiencing what they are feeling and so making us understand the reason to why the characters and specifically Eckels is panicking.


When the Men encounter the Tyrannosaurus Rex,Eckels announces that it’’ wasn't like this before’’ portraying the fact that he has done this before so that means he has had the experience before,Eckles is the only character to announce that he has done this before giving an impression that he should be tougher and should have been prepared.Eckles is the only character showing a lot of fear and panic meaning the dinosaur isn't that extreme and Eckles is over exaggerating the situation.



The writer makes it look as if the monster is terrifying without even moving he states ‘’the monster itself did not move. It exhaled. The stink of raw flesh blew down the wilderness.’’,this use of exaggeration gives an effect on the reader by emphasising how even without moving the ‘’monster is terrifying’’
The writer explains that the monster will ‘’crush them like berries’’, this simile shows how powerful the dinosaur is and how meaningless humans are to the dinosaur,the dinosaur appears to be hungry as this isnt the only time there is an image portrayed of hunger an example of another time is when he is described to have a ‘’screaming throat’’,yes this could be an example of how angry he is but also ‘’screaming’’ could also shadow that his throat is ‘’screaming ‘’ because its hungry and needs food.
For Q2, in the second paragraph, you are talking about structure, which would be in Q3 instead, and so would get low marks for that paragraph.
your third paragraph was really good, but for your first one, I would suggest analysing a different technique, one that is unique, and not so typical, especially since you should give the examiner a really good first impression

for Q3, your second paragraph was definitely the best one
your third paragraph was almost near perfect, but I think you finished off too quickly. If you ended in a slightly different way, one that was a little unique, or if you had phrased it in a different manner, i'm sure you would have been fine
remember that Q3 is like directing a movie - go in chronological order, and analyse the focus changes and other structural devices.

Your Q4 is good, but I think you should focus on planning your points a bit more quickly, so that when you are writing a paragraph, the quotes you use is to back up the point, not the other way round, if that makes sense? because if your points and ideas were a bit more structured, then you would be able to argue it a bit better

hope that helped??

BUT OVERALL YOUR ANSWERS WERE REALLY GOOD!!!
WELL DONE!
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k.kk
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(Original post by Marissa01)
For Q2, in the second paragraph, you are talking about structure, which would be in Q3 instead, and so would get low marks for that paragraph.
your third paragraph was really good, but for your first one, I would suggest analysing a different technique, one that is unique, and not so typical, especially since you should give the examiner a really good first impression

for Q3, your second paragraph was definitely the best one
your third paragraph was almost near perfect, but I think you finished off too quickly. If you ended in a slightly different way, one that was a little unique, or if you had phrased it in a different manner, i'm sure you would have been fine
remember that Q3 is like directing a movie - go in chronological order, and analyse the focus changes and other structural devices.

Your Q4 is good, but I think you should focus on planning your points a bit more quickly, so that when you are writing a paragraph, the quotes you use is to back up the point, not the other way round, if that makes sense? because if your points and ideas were a bit more structured, then you would be able to argue it a bit better

hope that helped??

BUT OVERALL YOUR ANSWERS WERE REALLY GOOD!!!
WELL DONE!
Thank you soo much I really appreciate your response x
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Marissa01
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(Original post by k.kk)
Thank you soo much I really appreciate your response x
no problem
Glad I could help
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Marissa01
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I'm in year 12 and doing English Lit so i'm always happy to help
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k.kk
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I'm in year 12 and doing English Lit so i'm always happy to help
Tysm , would u be able to mark my question 5 for paper 1? If you are busy it's okayyy.

Write a story about time travel as suggested by this picture:
Storms brewed on the emotionless horizon promising nothing but winds to level even the mightiest of trees.Torrential rain poured down in icy sheets like needles upon my face.The wind didn't howl,it screamed.The rain was not falling:it was driven,hard,merciless,torrential .The trees did not sway,they creaked,bent and moaned as their fine limbs were ripped away and their autumn leaves became not confetti,but ammunition in the gale.

A car came out of nowhere and drove right through a puddle that was doing a very good impression of a miniature lake.I was soaked.
Great.
Now I had to spend the entire day like this.The added weight of the water was enough to drop my emotions to a new low.I packed my umbrella away;no need for that,now i'm soaked.The outline of the school was barely visible even within its proximity.
I opened the school gate to find the vast area eerily quiet.Silence-well apart from the heavy rain.I crossed the grounds to the entrance where the sound of life emerged.The heavy bustling of the multitude of children leaked through the doors.I walked into my form room,taking a seat by the window:from the window I spotted an enormous white building ,mountain shaped which I had never in a million years ever seen,i needed to check this out immediately; it was too fogy for me to see it from here.

After what felt like ten million hours of school,the teacher finally said ‘’class dismissed’’ and I had never been happier to leave school,barging every one out of the way - I quickly ran out trying not to slip on the slithering slippery floor.

I arrived.The building was something spectacular,something unordinary,something I had never ever seen before.

One side of the building was made up of crystals and diamonds as bright as the sun whereas the other side of the building looked like it hadn’t been touched for centuries; it looked like the inside of a chimney! As I entered I saw two platforms, one with dragons,fairies and elfs and another with humans that wore clothes that were nothing but grey,they looked like they came from a century made out of black and white.

Boom, splash,fairy dust fell from the sky and everyone started smiling.I walked outside I felt free. I felt like a bird released from its cage. I flew around to see the storm was replaced with sun and fancy swimming pools.Time had gone forward ,there was no such thing as school or storms anymore only sunny days existed !It was the best day of my life!
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Marissa01
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(Original post by k.kk)
Tysm , would u be able to mark my question 5 for paper 1? If you are busy it's okayyy.

Write a story about time travel as suggested by this picture:
Storms brewed on the emotionless horizon promising nothing but winds to level even the mightiest of trees.Torrential rain poured down in icy sheets like needles upon my face.The wind didn't howl,it screamed.The rain was not falling:it was driven,hard,merciless,torrential .The trees did not sway,they creaked,bent and moaned as their fine limbs were ripped away and their autumn leaves became not confetti,but ammunition in the gale.

A car came out of nowhere and drove right through a puddle that was doing a very good impression of a miniature lake.I was soaked.
Great.
Now I had to spend the entire day like this.The added weight of the water was enough to drop my emotions to a new low.I packed my umbrella away;no need for that,now i'm soaked.The outline of the school was barely visible even within its proximity.
I opened the school gate to find the vast area eerily quiet.Silence-well apart from the heavy rain.I crossed the grounds to the entrance where the sound of life emerged.The heavy bustling of the multitude of children leaked through the doors.I walked into my form room,taking a seat by the window:from the window I spotted an enormous white building ,mountain shaped which I had never in a million years ever seen,i needed to check this out immediately; it was too fogy for me to see it from here.

After what felt like ten million hours of school,the teacher finally said ‘’class dismissed’’ and I had never been happier to leave school,barging every one out of the way - I quickly ran out trying not to slip on the slithering slippery floor.

I arrived.The building was something spectacular,something unordinary,something I had never ever seen before.

One side of the building was made up of crystals and diamonds as bright as the sun whereas the other side of the building looked like it hadn’t been touched for centuries; it looked like the inside of a chimney! As I entered I saw two platforms, one with dragons,fairies and elfs and another with humans that wore clothes that were nothing but grey,they looked like they came from a century made out of black and white.

Boom, splash,fairy dust fell from the sky and everyone started smiling.I walked outside I felt free. I felt like a bird released from its cage. I flew around to see the storm was replaced with sun and fancy swimming pools.Time had gone forward ,there was no such thing as school or storms anymore only sunny days existed !It was the best day of my life!
The start in particular was very strong - well done!
but I think you should focus a bit more on the technique called "show don't tell" - you seem to be doing both (telling us first, then showing) so if you cut out the "telling" part you should be fine
Also, try to include some unusual techniques like starting and ending with a symbol, a word or something like that, whose repetition will have a strong effect
your vocabulary is really nicely handled too, but try being a bit more experimentive and unusual in the way you present them and describe things - remember that examiners will have so many papers to mark, so the less typical yours is, the better

but overall ....
I really like your story - and the end is so nice! Honestly i'm smiling right now!!
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k.kk
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(Original post by Marissa01)
The start in particular was very strong - well done!
but I think you should focus a bit more on the technique called "show don't tell" - you seem to be doing both (telling us first, then showing) so if you cut out the "telling" part you should be fine
Also, try to include some unusual techniques like starting and ending with a symbol, a word or something like that, whose repetition will have a strong effect
your vocabulary is really nicely handled too, but try being a bit more experimentive and unusual in the way you present them and describe things - remember that examiners will have so many papers to mark, so the less typical yours is, the better

but overall ....
I really like your story - and the end is so nice! Honestly i'm smiling right now!!
Honestly thank you so so so muchhhhhhhh !
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Marissa01
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(Original post by k.kk)
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Honestly thank you so so so muchhhhhhhh !
no problemo!!
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