Does anyone else feel like this?

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lilycgbcd
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#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
Hey everyone, I really need some advice because I don’t think it’s normal for someone to be like this,

I just hate texting people, I hate calling people I just can’t do it. It sounds so stupid but I even feel like it with family, in secondary school I literally never replied to people but now I’ve gone to college I’m really trying to make more of an effort. It’s just so overwhelming, like I text someone and it’s so difficult coming up with a decent reply, and then they reply straight away and it feels like I need to go through the whole process again. I never know when to end a conversation as well and I just drag it on, so then I feel guilty because I’m really boring and stuff. Sometimes I even ask my sister and mum to help me reply to people but they just say I need to stop overthinking everything I do. People have always told me I’m really bad at replying and that I’m boring because I don’t keep up with the group chat, but really I just find it so hard to just find a good reply and consistently check my phone to ensure I reply on time. I really want to stop feeling like this and just text and call people normally without feeling so overwhelmed? Does anyone have any tips or feel like this?
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BobbyB123456
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(Original post by lilycgbcd)
Hey everyone, I really need some advice because I don’t think it’s normal for someone to be like this,

I just hate texting people, I hate calling people I just can’t do it. It sounds so stupid but I even feel like it with family, in secondary school I literally never replied to people but now I’ve gone to college I’m really trying to make more of an effort. It’s just so overwhelming, like I text someone and it’s so difficult coming up with a decent reply, and then they reply straight away and it feels like I need to go through the whole process again. I never know when to end a conversation as well and I just drag it on, so then I feel guilty because I’m really boring and stuff. Sometimes I even ask my sister and mum to help me reply to people but they just say I need to stop overthinking everything I do. People have always told me I’m really bad at replying and that I’m boring because I don’t keep up with the group chat, but really I just find it so hard to just find a good reply and consistently check my phone to ensure I reply on time. I really want to stop feeling like this and just text and call people normally without feeling so overwhelmed? Does anyone have any tips or feel like this?
This is why i dont have a phone....
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NoraSmith
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You sound just like me! Often huge gaps elapse between someone texting me and me replying, which I feel bad about. And read receipts are the bane of my life.
When you’re calling people, my best advice is just to try and get out of your head as much as possible - as in, rather than worrying about what you’re going to say, focus your mind on what the other person is saying. That often helps the conversation to flow more naturally.
Texting wise, don’t put pressure on yourself to have the perfect response every time. The more you get used to replying to people, the easier it will become - again, focus on what the other person is saying, rather than how you are coming over to them. Don’t be afraid to steer the conversation into areas that you find interesting, and if you have a thought, observation, or anecdote that could contribute to the conversation; just share it! If people have told you that you’re bad at replying, it’s because they want to hear from you - take it as an encouragement. You can’t be that boring!
Right, this is getting really long, so I’ll send it now, after reading it back for the 10th time
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lilycgbcd
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(Original post by BobbyB123456)
This is why i dont have a phone....
Gosh I admire you, it’s for the best though! Phones can be very addicting and toxic sometimes, it’s good to be in the real world
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lilycgbcd
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(Original post by NoraSmith)
You sound just like me! Often huge gaps elapse between someone texting me and me replying, which I feel bad about. And read receipts are the bane of my life.
When you’re calling people, my best advice is just to try and get out of your head as much as possible - as in, rather than worrying about what you’re going to say, focus your mind on what the other person is saying. That often helps the conversation to flow more naturally.
Texting wise, don’t put pressure on yourself to have the perfect response every time. The more you get used to replying to people, the easier it will become - again, focus on what the other person is saying, rather than how you are coming over to them. Don’t be afraid to steer the conversation into areas that you find interesting, and if you have a thought, observation, or anecdote that could contribute to the conversation; just share it! If people have told you that you’re bad at replying, it’s because they want to hear from you - take it as an encouragement. You can’t be that boring!
Right, this is getting really long, so I’ll send it now, after reading it back for the 10th time
Haha thank you so much!! This message had really changed my perspective on things glad to know that someone is similar to me hehe😊😊
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fishhhhhhhhhhh
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(Original post by lilycgbcd)
Hey everyone, I really need some advice because I don’t think it’s normal for someone to be like this,

I just hate texting people, I hate calling people I just can’t do it. It sounds so stupid but I even feel like it with family, in secondary school I literally never replied to people but now I’ve gone to college I’m really trying to make more of an effort. It’s just so overwhelming, like I text someone and it’s so difficult coming up with a decent reply, and then they reply straight away and it feels like I need to go through the whole process again. I never know when to end a conversation as well and I just drag it on, so then I feel guilty because I’m really boring and stuff. Sometimes I even ask my sister and mum to help me reply to people but they just say I need to stop overthinking everything I do. People have always told me I’m really bad at replying and that I’m boring because I don’t keep up with the group chat, but really I just find it so hard to just find a good reply and consistently check my phone to ensure I reply on time. I really want to stop feeling like this and just text and call people normally without feeling so overwhelmed? Does anyone have any tips or feel like this?
Yeah I felt like this a lot. I am shy/nervous irl and i dont have good social skills so i am not good at starting or ending conversations in text or calls. I generally did it to not seem weird so i was uncomfortable and was anxious about everything i said over the phone. However one thing that made me feel less tense is that no one is expecting you to be completely different on the phone or in text. Just talk how you would if you were with them irl. You dont have to put so much effort in people you like being around. If it was too hard it was probably because i didnt like them, didnt know them well or its a formal exchange.
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