Please check my personal statement

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RiceFarmer2002
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I would really appreciate it if someone (who is currently in/has gone to uni) could review my personal statement and make any improvements/reduce the number of characters. I have asked teachers but they were not much help at all and it would also be good to get an opinion from someone who has gone through this process.
I am applying for computer science / computer systems engineering.
ANY help would be greatly appreciated.
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Parziva1
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Have a look at the personal statement forum- volunteers will be able to help you
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Lshort17
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Check some of the uni websites as i know my uni had a few tips and pointers on what to achieve. As long as you have the main points on Experience, why you want to do the course. Any hobbies or DofE? Things in the subject area particularly that you find interesting. Thats mostly what i did for mine last year. Is there a career adviser or anything like that at your sixth form or college where you can get advice and guidance as i know my college had a dedicated department that dealt with uni and admissions, they really helped me and looked over my drafts and spellchecked it and everything
Last edited by Lshort17; 4 weeks ago
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ecolier
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(Original post by RiceFarmer2002)
I would really appreciate it if someone (who is currently in/has gone to uni) could review my personal statement and make any improvements/reduce the number of characters. I have asked teachers but they were not much help at all and it would also be good to get an opinion from someone who has gone through this process.
I am applying for computer science / computer systems engineering.
ANY help would be greatly appreciated.
TSR has a free and secure PS review service: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=4237154

Do NOT send it to any one else, or post it here in the public forums.

You stand the risk of it being plagarised and flagged up by turnitin. Then you'll be in a whole world of trouble.
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ashtolga23
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I'm not in uni so feel free to ignore me if you want, but I recently handed in my own application so it's a process I've been involved in very recently. Also a girl I barely ever speak to messaged me the night before she had to hand hers in and asked me to check over it, so perhaps that goes in my favour; I don't think she expected me to go into as much detail as I did, but at least it shows I'm thorough lol.

I'm generally alright at cutting down characters, but I don't know much about your course just to warn you. This girl did medicine though which I have equally no clue about. Essentially I can check how you've worded things and help in telling you how it reads through if you'd want me to, and make suggestions here and there.
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Lshort17
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(Original post by ecolier)
TSR has a free and secure PS review service: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=4237154

Do NOT send it to any one else, or post it here in the public forums.

You stand the risk of it being plagarised and flagged up by turnitin. Then you'll be in a whole world of trouble.
^completely, you dont want your statement to be voided so ideally seek a career advisor or TSRs own service
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tinygirl96
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Good luck!
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RiceFarmer2002
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(Original post by Lshort17)
Check some of the uni websites as i know my uni had a few tips and pointers on what to achieve. As long as you have the main points on Experience, why you want to do the course. Any hobbies or DofE? Things in the subject area particularly that you find interesting. Thats mostly what i did for mine last year. Is there a career adviser or anything like that at your sixth form or college where you can get advice and guidance as i know my college had a dedicated department that dealt with uni and admissions, they really helped me and looked over my drafts and spellchecked it and everything
My school did not provide much help at all, they just made a few changes to the draft. I will look at the uni websites though, thanks
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RiceFarmer2002
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(Original post by tinygirl96)
Good luck!
thank you
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RiceFarmer2002
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[xx
Thank you! I have sent an email and I forgot to mention that it is currently at 4268 characters
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RiceFarmer2002
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(Original post by ashtolga23)
I'm not in uni so feel free to ignore me if you want, but I recently handed in my own application so it's a process I've been involved in very recently. Also a girl I barely ever speak to messaged me the night before she had to hand hers in and asked me to check over it, so perhaps that goes in my favour; I don't think she expected me to go into as much detail as I did, but at least it shows I'm thorough lol.

I'm generally alright at cutting down characters, but I don't know much about your course just to warn you. This girl did medicine though which I have equally no clue about. Essentially I can check how you've worded things and help in telling you how it reads through if you'd want me to, and make suggestions here and there.
That would be great thanks! Can I have your email address so that I can send it?
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Muttley79
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(Original post by RiceFarmer2002)
That would be great thanks! Can I have your email address so that I can send it?
DO NOT send your PS to anyone on here - you'll need to rewrite it if you have!

There is a PS review area where it can be submitted safely.
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Muttley79
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(Original post by ashtolga23)
Yeah sure, I'll message you with it. I've actually looked over a close acquaintances tonight as well so I'm "in the zone" for it lmao.

I've already handed in my application and I'm doing a totally different course to you, so I promise it's safe.
You should not be offering this ... do not invalidate the OP's PS
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ashtolga23
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(Original post by Muttley79)
You should not be offering this ... do not invalidate the OP's PS
I was only going to make sure it read well but if that's still not okay then fair enough.

Sorry to be ignorant but do you mind me asking why this is the case? I have no reason to plagiarise it for the reasons I outlined, so are there any other problems?
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Muttley79
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(Original post by ashtolga23)
I was only going to make sure it read well but if that's still not okay then fair enough.

Sorry to be ignorant but do you mind me asking why this is the case? I have no reason to plagiarise it for the reasons I outlined, so are there any other problems?
It is not allowed on here ... there is a confidential way of submitting it on here which ecolier has mentioned.
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Interrobang
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(Original post by ashtolga23)
I was only going to make sure it read well but if that's still not okay then fair enough.

Sorry to be ignorant but do you mind me asking why this is the case? I have no reason to plagiarise it for the reasons I outlined, so are there any other problems?
If you want to support applicants, you can be a PS reviewer on TSR. The info is here: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=6107640
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