Today is my Birthday & I feel like I’ve wasted most of life

Watch
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
Every time my birthday starts to get closer I get these conflicting emotion. I havent celebrated my birthday for 10 years and I have a twin but my mom didn’t let me see her all these year. I suffered from PTSD ever since I was a kid.
I just started uni this year but I see others my age having a birthday parties, mates going to Nando’s together, or just going out in general.
I feel like my life has just been difficult from such a young age that I get scared when I’m actually happy. So it made it very difficult for me to socialise or make friends
And I feel like I’ve wasted most of it crying and going through my trauma
2
reply
LovelyMrFox
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#2
Report 4 weeks ago
#2
Happy birthday, I hope the coming year treats you well :hugs:

You cannot have wasted of your life unless you think you have. I dont think you've wasted it, you've simply been given more challenges to push through than others on this earth may have.
Have you seeked out counselling before?
3
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#3
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#3
Yh I have but due to covid it's not available. Thanks so much for the message
1
reply
vix.xvi
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#4
Report 4 weeks ago
#4
happy birthday xxxx
Spoiler:
Show
btw i 100% guarantee you hv not wasted ur life
Spoiler:
Show
100.1% acc

Last edited by vix.xvi; 4 weeks ago
1
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#5
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#5
(Original post by vix.xvi)
happy birthday xxxx
Spoiler:
Show
btw i 100% guarantee you hv not wasted ur life
Spoiler:
Show
100.1% acc

Thank you so much,
0
reply
laurawatt
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#6
Report 4 weeks ago
#6
Happy birthday :birthday: :hugs:

You’ve overcome so many things in your life and still ended up where people who had an easy ride through did, you’re so strong and have achieved so much!
2
reply
parmezanne
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#7
Report 4 weeks ago
#7
(Original post by Tenacity Deshad)
Every time my birthday starts to get closer I get these conflicting emotion. I havent celebrated my birthday for 10 years and I have a twin but my mom didn’t let me see her all these year. I suffered from PTSD ever since I was a kid.
I just started uni this year but I see others my age having a birthday parties, mates going to Nando’s together, or just going out in general.
I feel like my life has just been difficult from such a young age that I get scared when I’m actually happy. So it made it very difficult for me to socialise or make friends
And I feel like I’ve wasted most of it crying and going through my trauma
happy, happy birthday :hugs: :woo:

i'm really sorry that birthdays have been such a difficult time for you. many people also don't enjoy their birthdays, hate celebrating, or see it as 'another year gone' as opposed to 'another year given'. you sound so strong for being able to cope with life's difficulties :yep:

you don't have to celebrate your birthday in any specific way if you don't want to. don't go to nando's if it doesn't feel right! it's your day all about you, so spend it how you want to :yep:
1
reply
Rosielu
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#8
Report 4 weeks ago
#8
Happy Birthdayyyy. You haven’t wasted your life. I’m ac in a very similar position to u. I’ve just had my birthday and thinking about other people I felt like I could’ve done more or had more. But we’re still young we can still do more and I think that any difficulties we’ve faced in younger years makes us a lot stronger.
So happy birthday my friend, and look forward to things from now on. Let’s make our lives ourselves.
1
reply
Futurermedic?
Badges: 3
Rep:
?
#9
Report 4 weeks ago
#9
(Original post by Tenacity Deshad)
Every time my birthday starts to get closer I get these conflicting emotion. I havent celebrated my birthday for 10 years and I have a twin but my mom didn’t let me see her all these year. I suffered from PTSD ever since I was a kid.
I just started uni this year but I see others my age having a birthday parties, mates going to Nando’s together, or just going out in general.
I feel like my life has just been difficult from such a young age that I get scared when I’m actually happy. So it made it very difficult for me to socialise or make friends
And I feel like I’ve wasted most of it crying and going through my trauma
I feel the same way about birthdays, all my friends and family know how anxious and sad as my birthday gets closer. (Most think there is no reason behind it but its just very painful memories associated with that day). Every year I cry and I feel even more guilty everytime people tell me "Birthdays are meant to be happy". I call it Birthday Blues, and honestly one of my worst nightmares would be a surprise birthday party.my birthday just passed, and honestly, the relief knowing there is 364 days till the next one is unreal. However, my close friends and family who understand me keep me sane on my Birthday. All I want to say is, You are not alone, lot of people have birthday blues for various reasons, I just hope one day we all can allow ourselves to get past the sadness.
Last edited by Futurermedic?; 4 weeks ago
1
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#10
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#10
(Original post by Futurermedic?)
I feel the same way about birthdays, all my friends and family know how anxious and sad as my birthday gets closer. (Most think there is no reason behind it but its just very painful memories associated with that day). Every year I cry and I feel even more guilty everytime people tell me "Birthdays are meant to be happy". I call it Birthday Blues, and honestly one of my worst nightmares would be a surprise birthday party.my birthday just passed, and honestly, the relief knowing there is 364 days till the next one is unreal. However, my close friends and family who understand me keep me sane on my Birthday. All I want to say is, You are not alone, lot of people have birthday blues for various reasons, I just hope one day we all can allow ourselves to get past the sadness.
Thank you so much, this helped so much. I didnt think that someone else had "Birthday Blues". I'm so glad there are still people like you around. I will try and move forward with my life and I hope you do to. I hope that we find the peace to confront our past and try and let them go.
1
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#11
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#11
(Original post by Rosielu)
Happy Birthdayyyy. You haven’t wasted your life. I’m ac in a very similar position to u. I’ve just had my birthday and thinking about other people I felt like I could’ve done more or had more. But we’re still young we can still do more and I think that any difficulties we’ve faced in younger years makes us a lot stronger.
So happy birthday my friend, and look forward to things from now on. Let’s make our lives ourselves.
Thank you so much, and you are right we are still young and this makes us stronger in the future. I will try my absolute best to look forward to the future and I hope you do to yourself
0
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#12
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#12
(Original post by parmezanne)
happy, happy birthday :hugs: :woo:

i'm really sorry that birthdays have been such a difficult time for you. many people also don't enjoy their birthdays, hate celebrating, or see it as 'another year gone' as opposed to 'another year given'. you sound so strong for being able to cope with life's difficulties :yep:

you don't have to celebrate your birthday in any specific way if you don't want to. don't go to nando's if it doesn't feel right! it's your day all about you, so spend it how you want to :yep:
Thank you so much for the reply, I really appreciate it. I'm glad that not everyone likes Birthdays because when I tell friends I don't do birthdays they think I'm weird 😅. So it's really nice to hear this from someone else
0
reply
sinfonietta
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#13
Report 4 weeks ago
#13
Instead of stressing over time you feel you have wasted, take this as the kick up the backside you need to start living life more fully. Set goals of things you wish to achieve (with a mix of both fun and serious things - e.g. finish a video game, make new friends, climb a mountain, and graduate uni!) and start working towards those.
1
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#14
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#14
(Original post by sinfonietta)
Instead of stressing over time you feel you have wasted, take this as the kick up the backside you need to start living life more fully. Set goals of things you wish to achieve (with a mix of both fun and serious things - e.g. finish a video game, make new friends, climb a mountain, and graduate uni!) and start working towards those.
Yh that kick definitely gave me a wake up call😂 I will try and set goals for this year and try and move on. Thanks for the message
0
reply
Tenacity Deshad
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#15
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#15
(Original post by laurawatt)
Happy birthday :birthday: :hugs:

You’ve overcome so many things in your life and still ended up where people who had an easy ride through did, you’re so strong and have achieved so much!
Thanks so much, this helps me look up to myself as it makes me feel like I've been strong all these years and I should still be able to stay strong. Thank you for the reply
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Are you travelling in the Uni student travel window (3-9 Dec) to go home for Christmas?

Yes (44)
32.35%
No - I have already returned home (16)
11.76%
No - I plan on travelling outside these dates (27)
19.85%
No - I'm staying at my term time address over Christmas (11)
8.09%
No - I live at home during term anyway (38)
27.94%

Watched Threads

View All