Am I being unreasonable? Deleting my account, and ghosting him?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
I fell for this guy online. Just know we are both over the age of 18 so please refrain from talking to me about online safety.

We met in November 2019, and became friends, really good friends. We both had a bond, and I've even shares things on TSR before about us and our conversations, and other members have said it sounds like I've found a guy that really respects me, and that it does sound like we have a bond from our comversations. And he was planning on flying over to meet me in the summer.

Well for the last 2 weeks, we had almost become lovers. We sent each other good morning texts, and sent kiss emojis, sexted, he sent me nudes, and we would just talk like a couple even though we werent one. I never sent him nudes because I just didnt feel comfortable. In fact, I never even gave him my number because I wasn't ready. It was a huge step to me, but i was comfortable with eveything else and he didnt seem to mind at the time. We were even allowed to see other people, even though he had shown signs of being jealous every now and then.

2 days ago he texted me to say he thinks what we are doing is a little weird because we are like a couple except me arent one. He said he needs to hear my voice and wants to be with me and just feels disconnected to me for these reasons, I completely understood this, and respected his decision. He still plans on visiting on the summer, and if we like each other we will carry on and be an actual couple.

Its only been 2 days but we've changed. He used to really want me tk okay Among Us with his friends, and when I asked if we will still do all that he said I'm always welcome to play with them. It sounded too formal.
He messaged me yesterday saying he hopes there's no hard feelings between us, and apologising if he was a little cold the night before, I responded saying there's no hard feelings and I understand his situation. Conversation finished from there, and then later on he messaged me that they are playing Among Us if im interested, and I basically said I won't play today.

Today none of us messaged the other, we used to message everyday.
So earlier I messaged him "Hi. What are you up to?" and he responded with "Playing Among Us". He didnt even bother asking about me. He didnt even ask if I wanted to play which made me feel more of a charity case, like he doesnt really want me around anymore. He literally asked me so many times to download the game before, I only got into it because he wanted me to play with his friends. And now I'm not even invited to play with them.

I respond with "Alright. Catch up another time. Goodnight" and he just respondrd to that with goodnight.

I am really heartbroken right now, and I'm very tempted to just cancel my account on the site we met on and just never contact him ever again. I've had a cry about it, and i just don't like how emotionally invested I've become in him.

Am I being unreasonable if I just left now? By deleting my account and never contacting him again?
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Memiiiiini
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#2
Report 4 weeks ago
#2
If you delete your account and block him theres no turning back and its gonna hurt more if you regret it, id say try give it a bit of time and try talk things out and see what u guys really want and try fo be on good terms but its hard when you dont see them so mAybe hes just sad about thT
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Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
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(Original post by Memiiiiini)
If you delete your account and block him theres no turning back and its gonna hurt more if you regret it, id say try give it a bit of time and try talk things out and see what u guys really want and try fo be on good terms but its hard when you dont see them so mAybe hes just sad about thT
You're right. I'll give it a few more days and see how he is. I was very tempted to just leave everything today, and leave it behind me no matter how painful because that way it will force me to move on and not be hurt further.

I'll see how it goes but I'm not dropping the idea is ghosting either.
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sunny.side.up
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#4
Report 4 weeks ago
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
I fell for this guy online. Just know we are both over the age of 18 so please refrain from talking to me about online safety.

We met in November 2019, and became friends, really good friends. We both had a bond, and I've even shares things on TSR before about us and our conversations, and other members have said it sounds like I've found a guy that really respects me, and that it does sound like we have a bond from our comversations. And he was planning on flying over to meet me in the summer.

Well for the last 2 weeks, we had almost become lovers. We sent each other good morning texts, and sent kiss emojis, sexted, he sent me nudes, and we would just talk like a couple even though we werent one. I never sent him nudes because I just didnt feel comfortable. In fact, I never even gave him my number because I wasn't ready. It was a huge step to me, but i was comfortable with eveything else and he didnt seem to mind at the time. We were even allowed to see other people, even though he had shown signs of being jealous every now and then.

2 days ago he texted me to say he thinks what we are doing is a little weird because we are like a couple except me arent one. He said he needs to hear my voice and wants to be with me and just feels disconnected to me for these reasons, I completely understood this, and respected his decision. He still plans on visiting on the summer, and if we like each other we will carry on and be an actual couple.

Its only been 2 days but we've changed. He used to really want me tk okay Among Us with his friends, and when I asked if we will still do all that he said I'm always welcome to play with them. It sounded too formal.
He messaged me yesterday saying he hopes there's no hard feelings between us, and apologising if he was a little cold the night before, I responded saying there's no hard feelings and I understand his situation. Conversation finished from there, and then later on he messaged me that they are playing Among Us if im interested, and I basically said I won't play today.

Today none of us messaged the other, we used to message everyday.
So earlier I messaged him "Hi. What are you up to?" and he responded with "Playing Among Us". He didnt even bother asking about me. He didnt even ask if I wanted to play which made me feel more of a charity case, like he doesnt really want me around anymore. He literally asked me so many times to download the game before, I only got into it because he wanted me to play with his friends. And now I'm not even invited to play with them.

I respond with "Alright. Catch up another time. Goodnight" and he just respondrd to that with goodnight.

I am really heartbroken right now, and I'm very tempted to just cancel my account on the site we met on and just never contact him ever again. I've had a cry about it, and i just don't like how emotionally invested I've become in him.

Am I being unreasonable if I just left now? By deleting my account and never contacting him again?
I mean it doesn't sound like he isn't interested anymore just confused maybe. I wouldn't do all that. He hasn't even said how he feels yet. I'd just wait and see if he reachs out again and see what he says. Maybe you just need some clarity?
Spoiler:
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I get how you feel. The same thing has happened to me, but irl. If you want to, you can pm me. And, we can talk about it. :console: Hope this helps love!
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Surnia
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#5
Report 3 weeks ago
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Have you ever actually spoken with or Facetimed this guy?

How do you 'almost become lovers' in an online relationship?

How much emotional investment is there when it's an open relationship and you both agree it's OK to see other people?

You've probably said more on here about how you feel about this guy than you've said to him. Stop skirting round the issue and talking gaming; you need to have a proper conversation with him about how you both feel and where this is going, if anywhere.
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Anonymous #1
#6
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#6
(Original post by sunny.side.up)
I mean it doesn't sound like he isn't interested anymore just confused maybe. I wouldn't do all that. He hasn't even said how he feels yet. I'd just wait and see if he reachs out again and see what he says. Maybe you just need some clarity?
Spoiler:
Show
I get how you feel. The same thing has happened to me, but irl. If you want to, you can pm me. And, we can talk about it. :console: Hope this helps love!
thank you so much for your support, I feel wuite vulnerable right now and have been in a mood all day. I'll let you know how everything goes in a couple of days 💙
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candydiva
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#7
Report 3 weeks ago
#7
U don't even share actual numbers and there's all this drama? Isn't it too much considering u haven't met him at all yet?
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sunny.side.up
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#8
Report 3 weeks ago
#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
thank you so much for your support, I feel wuite vulnerable right now and have been in a mood all day. I'll let you know how everything goes in a couple of days 💙
Your welcome love :hugs: Ok, I hope things get better for you. I'm here if you ever wanna talk.
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Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#9
(Original post by candydiva)
U don't even share actual numbers and there's all this drama? Isn't it too much considering u haven't met him at all yet?
no, we just mean a lot to each other and easily get hurt. i had a chat with him and we've talked through jt, we are fune now
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