Housemates unbearable boyfriend
My housemate has moved her boyfriend in from Wednesday to Sunday every week without asking any of us. He does all his washing here (3-4 loads a week), uses all my stuff for washing and steals food out of my cupboard, but doesn’t pay anything towards the bills and has never offered anything. None of us signed up for a fifth housemate is there anything I can do. He’s working so it’s not as if he has no money to contribute either. How can I broach the subject with my housemate without causing any bad feeling?
Maybe try to have a sit down with both of them and voice your concerns. If you other housemates have a problem with him as well, see if they'd sit down with you too. Just try to stay calm and hear what he has to say.
Original post by sunny.side.up
Maybe try to have a sit down with both of them and voice your concerns. If you other housemates have a problem with him as well, see if they'd sit down with you too. Just try to stay calm and hear what he has to say.
The annoying thing is he’s in the army so technically shouldn’t be leaving the base with COVID as he has to travel from England to Wales or vice versa. He’s also very anti social and when I try to talk to him just to make small talk he ignores me.
Original post by Lilly2510
The annoying thing is he’s in the army so technically shouldn’t be leaving the base with COVID as he has to travel from England to Wales or vice versa. He’s also very anti social and when I try to talk to him just to make small talk he ignores me.
Do you think if all of you reached out he'd listen?
Original post by sunny.side.up
Do you think if all of you reached out he'd listen?
Honestly no, she’s fallen out with her family at the moment so he’s her only real support (outside of friends) so I don’t think she’d listen either.
Original post by Lilly2510
Honestly no, she’s fallen out with her family at the moment so he’s her only real support (outside of friends) so I don’t think she’d listen either.
I don't really know what advice to give you then. I think trying to talk with them both would be the only way to share your feelings. But, it seems you can't do that.
Original post by Lilly2510
My housemate has moved her boyfriend in from Wednesday to Sunday every week without asking any of us. He does all his washing here (3-4 loads a week), uses all my stuff for washing and steals food out of my cupboard, but doesn’t pay anything towards the bills and has never offered anything. None of us signed up for a fifth housemate is there anything I can do. He’s working so it’s not as if he has no money to contribute either. How can I broach the subject with my housemate without causing any bad feeling?
Hide your food.
Original post by Lilly2510
My housemate has moved her boyfriend in from Wednesday to Sunday every week without asking any of us. He does all his washing here (3-4 loads a week), uses all my stuff for washing and steals food out of my cupboard, but doesn’t pay anything towards the bills and has never offered anything. None of us signed up for a fifth housemate is there anything I can do. He’s working so it’s not as if he has no money to contribute either. How can I broach the subject with my housemate without causing any bad feeling?
Sit & explain this to the housemate.
But take care to view it from all perspectives before hand so to minimise friction and keep everything civil, its their responsibility to make sure the BF is courteous.
It was taken from my cupboard and the fridge
Original post by kirachan
Hide your food.
Original post by Lilly2510
It was taken from my cupboard and the fridge
Geez, he’s relentless. I don’t get why people are so emphatic about your roommate. It’s totally unacceptable that he steals from you (if you’re 100 percent sure it’s him).
If I was in your position I’d just talk to him in a loud tone saying that’s overstepping boundaries and if he ever does something like that again you’ll tell your landlord he’s living there. (You could also do the latter on straight up, but obviously you’ll have beef with your roommate). If you can handle that, do it
Original post by Lilly2510
My housemate has moved her boyfriend in from Wednesday to Sunday every week without asking any of us. He does all his washing here (3-4 loads a week), uses all my stuff for washing and steals food out of my cupboard, but doesn’t pay anything towards the bills and has never offered anything. None of us signed up for a fifth housemate is there anything I can do. He’s working so it’s not as if he has no money to contribute either. How can I broach the subject with my housemate without causing any bad feeling?
Hey @Lilly2510
It sounds like you are in a bit of a sticky situation at the moment.
if I were you I would first talk to the other housemates and get their opinion on what is going on - if they agree with you then you can all sit down together and talk to your housemate about her boyfriend (it might be easier to do when he isn’t there - and then she can relay the information to him later on)
seeing as he has a job could you not split the bills by 5 people - him doing his washing will use a fair amount of electricity.
Also as for your washing stuff that he uses - I know it’s not ideal but I would put it in your room if you can.
If after talking to your housemate she doesn’t agree to any of this then you could report her to the landlord.
I hope you manage to sort it out!
Eloise - Official Student Rep
Original post by Lilly2510
My housemate has moved her boyfriend in from Wednesday to Sunday every week without asking any of us. He does all his washing here (3-4 loads a week), uses all my stuff for washing and steals food out of my cupboard, but doesn’t pay anything towards the bills and has never offered anything. None of us signed up for a fifth housemate is there anything I can do. He’s working so it’s not as if he has no money to contribute either. How can I broach the subject with my housemate without causing any bad feeling?
What sort of accommodation is it? If he's not a student he'll need to pay council tax and he may be breaching her contract -
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