How to break up with my bf??

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 6 months ago
#1
I’m not happy in my relationship but I don’t know how to end things. I broke up with him in april over something that happened but he begged for me back for ages. I eventually met up with him in September because we had kinda started talking again and he told me he just wanted to see me once (and if I didn’t change my mind about not taking him back then he’d leave me alone).

I regret taking him back and I feel like I’d be happier single as this relationship stresses me out a lot at times. My dilemma is that I want to break up with him and I’ve mentioned that it’s not working out multiple times but he’ll always convince me to stay and that it’ll work out.

How do I break up with him so that he’ll leave me alone? I know his reaction will be bad which is why I’ve been delaying it as I know he’ll get angry. He’ll even probably accuse me of having someone else and try to make me feel bad. Btw the last time I broke up with him he was blocked on everything for months and I wasn’t replying but he tried loads of different ways to contact me and wouldn’t give up.
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Miswavvy
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m not happy in my relationship but I don’t know how to end things. I broke up with him in april over something that happened but he begged for me back for ages. I eventually met up with him in September because we had kinda started talking again and he told me he just wanted to see me once (and if I didn’t change my mind about not taking him back then he’d leave me alone).

I regret taking him back and I feel like I’d be happier single as this relationship stresses me out a lot at times. My dilemma is that I want to break up with him and I’ve mentioned that it’s not working out multiple times but he’ll always convince me to stay and that it’ll work out.

How do I break up with him so that he’ll leave me alone? I know his reaction will be bad which is why I’ve been delaying it as I know he’ll get angry. He’ll even probably accuse me of having someone else and try to make me feel bad. Btw the last time I broke up with him he was blocked on everything for months and I wasn’t replying but he tried loads of different ways to contact me and wouldn’t give up.
My friend is in a similar situation :/
So from what I can gather he rlly likes u (maybe loves u idk??). Use that to ur advantage. Sit him down and lay it out. Tell him all your emotions and feelings, and say that it is affecting you and ur life. Rlly convey to him that you are not happy and feel very trapped and pressured?? If he likes u THAT much, surly he will be concerned about ur emotions and feelings. Hopefully ahahah. Even though its not nice, u might have to be harsh like say that ur not in love anymore, say ur not happy. U just have to be firm in ur decision and its his problem if he can't take it. In reality there is only so much you can do and if things get out of hand (like him tryna stalk u or whatever) get an adult involved. I would say, rlly try to put him in his place, and be a little bit harsh, bc then he will realise that ur being 100% serious.

DON'T WASTE UR TIME WITH A GUY THATS NOT RIGHT FOR U!!!!!
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Anonymous #2
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Report 6 months ago
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Girl you’re telling me my life right now. I don’t know how to do it myself and I just pray my partner cheats on me or something or breaks up with me so I don’t have to as horrible as that sounds ......
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Miswavvy
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#4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Girl you’re telling me my life right now. I don’t know how to do it myself and I just pray my partner cheats on me or something or breaks up with me so I don’t have to as horrible as that sounds ......
DOOD WHAT!!! i rather break up with som1 bc the person being broken up with always gets it worse. girl my last break up left me sad for a solid 4 months... tfffff
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Miswavvy)
DOOD WHAT!!! i rather break up with som1 bc the person being broken up with always gets it worse. girl my last break up left me sad for a solid 4 months... tfffff
But I want him to break up with me so I don’t feel guilty 😭 obviously I care about my partner and I’d be sad to part ways with him but I’m not in love with him anymore and I can’t get myself to break his heart coz he loves me so much.....
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
But I want him to break up with me so I don’t feel guilty 😭 obviously I care about my partner and I’d be sad to part ways with him but I’m not in love with him anymore and I can’t get myself to break his heart coz he loves me so much.....
U don’t owe him anything, if u wanna go then tell him straight rather than hoping one day he’ll make the call, it’s better to get it over and done with
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username5161072
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#7
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#7
(Original post by Anonymous)
Girl you’re telling me my life right now. I don’t know how to do it myself and I just pray my partner cheats on me or something or breaks up with me so I don’t have to as horrible as that sounds ......
Just tell him how you feel y'know. What's the least he can do? Guy just has to accept what it is. Can't have it all
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Anonymous #1
#8
Report Thread starter 6 months ago
#8
(Original post by Miswavvy)
My friend is in a similar situation :/
So from what I can gather he rlly likes u (maybe loves u idk??). Use that to ur advantage. Sit him down and lay it out. Tell him all your emotions and feelings, and say that it is affecting you and ur life. Rlly convey to him that you are not happy and feel very trapped and pressured?? If he likes u THAT much, surly he will be concerned about ur emotions and feelings. Hopefully ahahah. Even though its not nice, u might have to be harsh like say that ur not in love anymore, say ur not happy. U just have to be firm in ur decision and its his problem if he can't take it. In reality there is only so much you can do and if things get out of hand (like him tryna stalk u or whatever) get an adult involved. I would say, rlly try to put him in his place, and be a little bit harsh, bc then he will realise that ur being 100% serious.

DON'T WASTE UR TIME WITH A GUY THATS NOT RIGHT FOR U!!!!!
Thank you so much for the advice. The thing is I know he loves me but because of what he’s done in the past I have trust issues. I tried moving past them but it’s hard and we argue a lot. I think the relationship is toxic which is why I wanna leave. I’ll try doing what you suggested though x
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 6 months ago
#9
(Original post by TheStarboy)
Just tell him how you feel y'know. What's the least he can do? Guy just has to accept what it is. Can't have it all
I know this was advice for someone else but whenever I try breaking up with him he doesn’t accept it. The last time I tried we ended up fighting.
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Anonymous #4
#10
Report 6 months ago
#10
(Original post by Anonymous)
Girl you’re telling me my life right now. I don’t know how to do it myself and I just pray my partner cheats on me or something or breaks up with me so I don’t have to as horrible as that sounds ......
Do yourself and him a favour just end it please. It’ll be better in the long run.
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username5161072
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I know this was advice for someone else but whenever I try breaking up with him he doesn’t accept it. The last time I tried we ended up fighting.
Then that's someone who isn't ready for a relationship. Man needs to accept the truth. You're way too mature for his stubborness. Tell me for the last time and stand your ground. If he loves you, he should learn to let go because now he's becoming a problem.
Last edited by username5161072; 6 months ago
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0le
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#12
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It really is a case of telling him you don't want to be with him, telling him firmly not to contact you and blocking him from all forms of social media. Make all your social media accounts private and if possible, block friend requests.

Block his number on your phone. Delete him from any phone apps. Create a filter in your email addresses which automatically sends his email either to the bin, or to a folder which you don't have to read.

If he persists and you then begin to feel distressed and/or be becomes threatening, I would consider that harassment and would contact the local police:
https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/la...ut-harassment/


Examples of harassment include:

unwanted phone calls, letters, emails or visits

[sic]

Generally speaking harassment is behaviour which causes you distress or alarm.

The Act also says you must have experienced at least two incidents by the same person or group of people for it to be harassment.

It's the courts that decide if something is harassment under the Act. The courts will look at whether most people or a reasonable person would think the behaviour amounts to harassment.
Last edited by 0le; 6 months ago
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999tigger
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#13
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#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m not happy in my relationship but I don’t know how to end things. I broke up with him in april over something that happened but he begged for me back for ages. I eventually met up with him in September because we had kinda started talking again and he told me he just wanted to see me once (and if I didn’t change my mind about not taking him back then he’d leave me alone).

I regret taking him back and I feel like I’d be happier single as this relationship stresses me out a lot at times. My dilemma is that I want to break up with him and I’ve mentioned that it’s not working out multiple times but he’ll always convince me to stay and that it’ll work out.

How do I break up with him so that he’ll leave me alone? I know his reaction will be bad which is why I’ve been delaying it as I know he’ll get angry. He’ll even probably accuse me of having someone else and try to make me feel bad. Btw the last time I broke up with him he was blocked on everything for months and I wasn’t replying but he tried loads of different ways to contact me and wouldn’t give up.
Over the phone or write him a letter and get someone to deliver it.
Point out you are unhappy and have always been plus if he cares for you, then he will leave you alone in peace.
Ask him not to try and initiate contact or circumvent blocks as he did last time as that would upset you and if he cant respect your wishes, then you have been told to ring the police.
He needs toi find someone more suitable and you cnat be that person as you are not happy but stressed with him. Goodbye and thanks for all the fish.
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Miswavvy
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#14
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thank you so much for the advice. The thing is I know he loves me but because of what he’s done in the past I have trust issues. I tried moving past them but it’s hard and we argue a lot. I think the relationship is toxic which is why I wanna leave. I’ll try doing what you suggested though x
No problem! Just stay true to urself and stick to a solid plan. Better that u get out ur relationship sooner than later xoxo
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candydiva
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#15
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U can't "break up with him so he'll leave u alone" xcept cold turkey. Cut all connex, block, do not respond. Stick to ur plan and endure the emotional surf of the first few weeks. Otherwise, u send the msg that he can "get u back" whenever he wants....and u will for sure come to regret this later.
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Dunnig Kruger
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Put it in writing and preferably deliver it in front of independent witnesses.

Your letter to him should tell him that if he ever tries to contact you again that you will regard that as harrassment on his part.

You have a legal right to sever all ties with him.

You have a legal right to live the rest of your life without him featuring in it at all.

The laws in the UK on stalking and harassment are on your side.

He won't like it. But that's tough. If he'd treated you right he wouldn't be in this position.
It's not your fault he treated you so bad that it made you want to kick him totally out of your life. It's his.
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Anonymous #1
#17
Report Thread starter 6 months ago
#17
(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
Put it in writing and preferably deliver it in front of independent witnesses.

Your letter to him should tell him that if he ever tries to contact you again that you will regard that as harrassment on his part.

You have a legal right to sever all ties with him.

You have a legal right to live the rest of your life without him featuring in it at all.

The laws in the UK on stalking and harassment are on your side.

He won't like it. But that's tough. If he'd treated you right he wouldn't be in this position.
It's not your fault he treated you so bad that it made you want to kick him totally out of your life. It's his.
Thank you so much for the advice. I will try doing this ASAP.
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