The Student Room Group

Feel like I'm missing out because flatmates are boring

So I'm in a flat of 4, one girl doesn't like me for some reason and doesn't speak to me at all, one girl has been staying with her friends at a different uni for almost 4 weeks now and the third person I get on really well with but theres only so much I can handle of one person.

I did have two other friends outside of my flat but we had a bit of a disagreement over housing for next year so it'll probably be a little while before I spend time with them again.

I don't really know what to do, I see so much on social media of everyone with flnew friends etc and I just feel like I'm really missing out on the uni experience, even more than I would he with just covid.

I don't know what to do really since I can't meet people now due to lockdown and by the time I come back in January, friendship groups will be really established
I never went to uni, I wish I did as I see so many people that I know that have gone off to uni and they are experiencing so many new things, the best thing I would say is, maybe talk to them? Or just go all out and bring some alcohol back to your flat and just openly ask them if they would like to join you? I get where you’re coming from with how you can’t be around the same person 24/7 it can be a little too much, I would be feeling exactly how you are if I was in your situation, you’re in lockdown at the moment which I really hope you’re doing okay because it’s a bit hard at the moment with lockdown and uni and everything, enjoy just relaxing and chilling out on your own, light some candles in your room and watch Netflix, FaceTime some friends out of uni? But yeah I would say talk to them and if you don’t feel comfortable with that, when you come out of lockdown, you will be socialising with people out of your flat also with people in your class, my brother went to uni and he met so many people even out of his flat, hope everything goes well girlll x
Reply 2
Original post by Sick12738
I never went to uni, I wish I did as I see so many people that I know that have gone off to uni and they are experiencing so many new things, the best thing I would say is, maybe talk to them? Or just go all out and bring some alcohol back to your flat and just openly ask them if they would like to join you? I get where you’re coming from with how you can’t be around the same person 24/7 it can be a little too much, I would be feeling exactly how you are if I was in your situation, you’re in lockdown at the moment which I really hope you’re doing okay because it’s a bit hard at the moment with lockdown and uni and everything, enjoy just relaxing and chilling out on your own, light some candles in your room and watch Netflix, FaceTime some friends out of uni? But yeah I would say talk to them and if you don’t feel comfortable with that, when you come out of lockdown, you will be socialising with people out of your flat also with people in your class, my brother went to uni and he met so many people even out of his flat, hope everything goes well girlll x

Yeah I would do that but I think its too far gone with that girl, she's made it clear she doesn't like me which I don't understand because if anyone should dislike the other it should be me with her because she's so rude and disrespectful. I'll definitely just try and embrace being alone right now, its not something I mind in the short term. Hopefully January will be better. Thanks for your advice! :smile:
Reply 3
Original post by Admera
So I'm in a flat of 4, one girl doesn't like me for some reason and doesn't speak to me at all, one girl has been staying with her friends at a different uni for almost 4 weeks now and the third person I get on really well with but theres only so much I can handle of one person.

I did have two other friends outside of my flat but we had a bit of a disagreement over housing for next year so it'll probably be a little while before I spend time with them again.

I don't really know what to do, I see so much on social media of everyone with flew friends etc and I just feel like I'm really missing out on the uni experience, even more than I would he with just covid.

I don't know what to do really since I can't meet people now due to lockdown and by the time I come back in January, friendship groups will be really established

My own daughter experienced this during her first year as well, she found friends through societies and clubs - which I know is harder this year due to restrictions but that might be a way forward. To be honest there is no reason why you should get on with the students in your flat since you did not choose them. it would be normal for you not to get one with them rather than get on with them because with only 3 others there is not a large range of personalities etc.

it is also a very strange year and people's stresses andfears will be coming out and impacting relationships so that might be why people are being different.

DO NOT TRUST social media posts - people rarely spend time saying how bad things are, people only post the positives and unfortunately I would not necessarily trust the post to be 100% true. Everyone feels the pressure to present a positive view so that is what they show. behind the social media are lots of people who either are not posting because life is not great or posting overly positive stuff.

The first term is tough with all the changes going on with new course, new location (for many) making new friends etc. then there is the pressure to get accommodation sorted so quickly. slow down and see if uni life changes in January when you can get out and mix more - hopefully.
Original post by Admera
So I'm in a flat of 4, one girl doesn't like me for some reason and doesn't speak to me at all, one girl has been staying with her friends at a different uni for almost 4 weeks now and the third person I get on really well with but theres only so much I can handle of one person.

I did have two other friends outside of my flat but we had a bit of a disagreement over housing for next year so it'll probably be a little while before I spend time with them again.

I don't really know what to do, I see so much on social media of everyone with flnew friends etc and I just feel like I'm really missing out on the uni experience, even more than I would he with just covid.

I don't know what to do really since I can't meet people now due to lockdown and by the time I come back in January, friendship groups will be really established

Hey!

I'm sorry to hear this, I just wanted to check in and see how you were feeling now? Have you met any new people?

I was going to suggest looking into joining a club or society, there could be some virtual events being held, which will be a great way of meeting new people. Or how about becoming a student ambassador, volunteering or finding part-time work on campus?

I wish you all the best :smile:

Becky

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