How to live with controlling famliy members

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Anonymous #1
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My mum was very controlling bringing me up and now its passed on to my younger sibling so I have my mum and sister who control us.
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GabiAbi84
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Controlling in what way?
How old are you/what’s your living situation?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
Controlling in what way?
How old are you/what’s your living situation?
They control things we do like stopping us doing stuff
I've just turned 21 and its not easy to be honest but its just about doable
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GabiAbi84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
They control things we do like stopping us doing stuff
I've just turned 21 and its not easy to be honest but its just about doable
Who is “us” ?
What is “stuff”?

Do you work/study?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
Who is “us” ?
What is “stuff”?

Do you work/study?
Me and my siblings
They won't let us spend our own money
Don't let us out
Won't let us move out
Wont let me buy a car even though I passed my test
still kind of ground us
tell us when to go to bed

I'm training atm so I'd say its studying but I do have investments as well for my income
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Anonymous #1
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Bump
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Ne en mia nomo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Me and my siblings
They won't let us spend our own money
Don't let us out
Won't let us move out
Wont let me buy a car even though I passed my test
still kind of ground us
tell us when to go to bed

I'm training atm so I'd say its studying but I do have investments as well for my income
You're over 18, you can do whatever you want. If you feel it's not possible while living with them, move out. They can't legally stop you.
Last edited by Ne en mia nomo; 1 month ago
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sunny.side.up
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Why can't you just leave? You're of age.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Ne en mia nomo)
You're a over 18, you can do whatever you want. If you feel it's not possible while living with them, move out. They can't legally stop you.
Yes but im going to have to deal with it thats what im asking im asking how I can deal with it
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sunny.side.up
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes but im going to have to deal with it thats what im asking im asking how I can deal with it
Just stay to yourself, don't communicate with them unless you have to.
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tmughal
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Bit of a question, is this within a asian family or white?
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Ne en mia nomo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yes but im going to have to deal with it thats what im asking im asking how I can deal with it
I can't help you, I'm afraid. Why people stay in a situation where they're clearly unhappy and miserable, when they have an option to leave, is beyond me.
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GabiAbi84
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You’re 21-your finances should be in your control if you have earned them.
But you live under their roof so I’d expect you pay them money for rent and expenses etc.

To some extent -their house their rules though.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
You’re 21-your finances should be in your control if you have earned them.
But you live under their roof so I’d expect you pay them money for rent and expenses etc.

To some extent -their house their rules though.
I pay rent
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GabiAbi84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I pay rent
Okaaay... as I would expect given your age.
Why not save up and move out then?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tmughal)
Bit of a question, is this within a asian family or white?
Aisian
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by GabiAbi84)
Okaaay... as I would expect given your age.
Why not save up and move out then?
Not allowed thats the problem, I probably have enough to move out but they won't let me and this is the thing. This is what I said in the op and im asking how to deal with it because its **** but I'll have to do it
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Ne en mia nomo)
I can't help you, I'm afraid. Why people stay in a situation where they're clearly unhappy and miserable, when they have an option to leave, is beyond me.
Ok
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tmughal
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Bruh, you make it sound like its easy. if you aint in that situation then you wouldnt know how stuck you would feel. its not jus a push of a button then your out. Especially if it runs in the family. it aint gonna stop. if they start talking back then they`ll have nobody else to back them then they feel alone. but if they start getting emotionally abusive towards you then you can tell people your training for its happening then they can do something about it. it wont be easy but its a start.
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tmughal
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Asian, as i thought, they`re all backwards arent they smh, im asian btw but i know couple of girls who are in a family who have been emotionally abused by their own family. they`re more worried about their own stupid honour than their kids future and life. Only way to escape partly of this is by telling someone that can actually help you. yes it might be hard to go through but in the end only better for your own mental health.

if your able to even get an apartment a bit far out since u can drive. You legally can do tf u want. if they touch you thats it its game over for them and you can say to them how they treat you. if you can be financially stable, its something to think about.
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