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Is it weird for an internet friend to become a real friend?
I've literally just got off the phone my ex (who remained a good friend of mine for a long time since) and she's so mad at me because she thinks it's so weird that somebody I used to talk to on the internet is now a real friend of mine.
I've known her for a few years now, I actually started talking to her (on the internet) when I was going out with my ex, and it was never a flirty thing at all, just friendly. Me and this girl would just talk about our lives and give eachother advice and all of that, just like people do on TSR, because you can't always talk to people you know about certain things. This girl is from a different part of england and has a different life to me, I found it interesting because she was like none of my other friends. I would treat her just like any other friend of mine and ask her about how certain events (that she's mentioned before) turned out, just like you would anybody else.
After about a year this girl suggested we talk on the phone, just to be different. I didn't really think anything of it, it would have been nice to put a voice to who I was talking to, I mean i meet new people all the time and I have the privelige of talking vocally so why not with her? We spoke and it was quite fun, it was a laugh and we got on well. That was it. No big deal.
I told my ex (still girlfriend at that time) and she flipped out, I could understand that she wouldn't like me talking to another girl, I could understand jealousy..afterall i'd be annoyed if she was talking to another guy a lot, but that's not what bugged her. She was so annoyed because i'd never met this girl, it was too weird for her. We got over it and our 2 year relationship ended around 18 months ago.
Since then I still spoke to this girl on the internet as a friend, just like i would do with any of my other friends...she even helped me with my relationship, it was awesome to know she'd be there for me.
Like I said earlier, even though me and my ex broke up, we remained close friends, that was 18 months ago. Since then I carried on speaking to both my ex and this girl from the internet casually, then I had a few job interviews in london (where this girl is from) and she asked if I wanted to go for a drink while I was there, i mean at this point i'd known her for a few years and we'd spoke on the phone many times...so it was no big deal, it's not like I went to London specifically to see her. I met her and we had a nice drink and spoke like normal, we parted ways and it was great to know we get along in person. She's a friend and that's it.
So I was having an argument with my ex about 20 mins ago and in there this girl came up, I told her we'd met and again my ex absolutely flipped out and now she's not really talking to me. She finds it way too weird to comprehend.
All she see's is "oh, so when we were going out you were talking to girls on the internet then met up"...she just sees this big picture and it's so static, she says it as if i'm either A: I'm a loser with no real friends. B: some internet stalker.
I'm neither of those, i'm so offended that she finds this too weird. I have lots of friends and I enjoy meeting people, so what I orginally spoke to this girl on the internet as a friend, does that mean there's not a person on the other end of an msn conversation? I got along with her for years...so whenver i'm nearby i'm absolutely never allowed to see her? That's just rediculous. Why would I reject her as a perfectly good friend just because the method in which I met her wasn't face to face?? She's better than most people I meet in person. I'm not going to throw away a perfectly good friend. I'm so terribly offended that my ex thinks i'm too weird and throws me in a catergory with internet stalkers. How narrow minded.
I have some other (real) friends who have lived in countries like Spain and China, and they tell me about how people go up to anybody and strike conversation, and you go to bars where everybody knows eachother because they're so friendly and won't ignore people so much. But England is so ignorant, everybody I know who's been elsewhere agrees...so are people going to be closed minded enough to say that it's weird to have an internet friend who became a real one??
Please, let me know what you guys think about this subject, i'm curious to see what people generally think. And before you comment please read my entire post, don't just read little bits then summarise it with "oh my god you meet girls on the internet" (some loser will post that for the sake of this though). Also, don't get me wrong here, I talk to anybody I like, it just seems easier to talk to girls because if you try talking to random guys it's just seen as gay, so it's much easier to talk to women you don't know.
I've known her for a few years now, I actually started talking to her (on the internet) when I was going out with my ex, and it was never a flirty thing at all, just friendly. Me and this girl would just talk about our lives and give eachother advice and all of that, just like people do on TSR, because you can't always talk to people you know about certain things. This girl is from a different part of england and has a different life to me, I found it interesting because she was like none of my other friends. I would treat her just like any other friend of mine and ask her about how certain events (that she's mentioned before) turned out, just like you would anybody else.
After about a year this girl suggested we talk on the phone, just to be different. I didn't really think anything of it, it would have been nice to put a voice to who I was talking to, I mean i meet new people all the time and I have the privelige of talking vocally so why not with her? We spoke and it was quite fun, it was a laugh and we got on well. That was it. No big deal.
I told my ex (still girlfriend at that time) and she flipped out, I could understand that she wouldn't like me talking to another girl, I could understand jealousy..afterall i'd be annoyed if she was talking to another guy a lot, but that's not what bugged her. She was so annoyed because i'd never met this girl, it was too weird for her. We got over it and our 2 year relationship ended around 18 months ago.
Since then I still spoke to this girl on the internet as a friend, just like i would do with any of my other friends...she even helped me with my relationship, it was awesome to know she'd be there for me.
Like I said earlier, even though me and my ex broke up, we remained close friends, that was 18 months ago. Since then I carried on speaking to both my ex and this girl from the internet casually, then I had a few job interviews in london (where this girl is from) and she asked if I wanted to go for a drink while I was there, i mean at this point i'd known her for a few years and we'd spoke on the phone many times...so it was no big deal, it's not like I went to London specifically to see her. I met her and we had a nice drink and spoke like normal, we parted ways and it was great to know we get along in person. She's a friend and that's it.
So I was having an argument with my ex about 20 mins ago and in there this girl came up, I told her we'd met and again my ex absolutely flipped out and now she's not really talking to me. She finds it way too weird to comprehend.
All she see's is "oh, so when we were going out you were talking to girls on the internet then met up"...she just sees this big picture and it's so static, she says it as if i'm either A: I'm a loser with no real friends. B: some internet stalker.
I'm neither of those, i'm so offended that she finds this too weird. I have lots of friends and I enjoy meeting people, so what I orginally spoke to this girl on the internet as a friend, does that mean there's not a person on the other end of an msn conversation? I got along with her for years...so whenver i'm nearby i'm absolutely never allowed to see her? That's just rediculous. Why would I reject her as a perfectly good friend just because the method in which I met her wasn't face to face?? She's better than most people I meet in person. I'm not going to throw away a perfectly good friend. I'm so terribly offended that my ex thinks i'm too weird and throws me in a catergory with internet stalkers. How narrow minded.
I have some other (real) friends who have lived in countries like Spain and China, and they tell me about how people go up to anybody and strike conversation, and you go to bars where everybody knows eachother because they're so friendly and won't ignore people so much. But England is so ignorant, everybody I know who's been elsewhere agrees...so are people going to be closed minded enough to say that it's weird to have an internet friend who became a real one??
Please, let me know what you guys think about this subject, i'm curious to see what people generally think. And before you comment please read my entire post, don't just read little bits then summarise it with "oh my god you meet girls on the internet" (some loser will post that for the sake of this though). Also, don't get me wrong here, I talk to anybody I like, it just seems easier to talk to girls because if you try talking to random guys it's just seen as gay, so it's much easier to talk to women you don't know.
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hey, i just read your entire post and i find the behaviour of your ex very bizarre.
If she thinks of you as a weirdo for meeting a person over the internet, who then,
after the test of time, has proven to be a friend- i would think her the weirdo.
From everything you have written, I can't find anything that appeared bizarre
to me(except your ex's reactions and behaviour).
We are in the 21st century and the internet has become such an important
part in most people's lives that it strikes me as plain normal to meet new people
over the internet and then maybe get to know them in real life as well.
I, for one, met my best friend 7 and a half years ago over the internet as part
of a club, we thus shared a common interest and after a few months of email
communication started to talk on the phone as we were both bored. Soon
my mother had to go to Cologne, the city in which she lives, for something
work-related, so it was arranged that I would accompany her and make use
of the occasion to meet that girl I got acquainted with over the internet.
We immediately got along as well as I never got on with anybody before,
I spent the night at her place and when it was time to go back to Berlin with
my mother, she accompanied us and stayed for a week. Ever since she proved
to be the best of friends one can imagine.
So, I guess, I'll be the last person to judge meeting someone over the internet
as weird.
If she thinks of you as a weirdo for meeting a person over the internet, who then,
after the test of time, has proven to be a friend- i would think her the weirdo.
From everything you have written, I can't find anything that appeared bizarre
to me(except your ex's reactions and behaviour).
We are in the 21st century and the internet has become such an important
part in most people's lives that it strikes me as plain normal to meet new people
over the internet and then maybe get to know them in real life as well.
I, for one, met my best friend 7 and a half years ago over the internet as part
of a club, we thus shared a common interest and after a few months of email
communication started to talk on the phone as we were both bored. Soon
my mother had to go to Cologne, the city in which she lives, for something
work-related, so it was arranged that I would accompany her and make use
of the occasion to meet that girl I got acquainted with over the internet.
We immediately got along as well as I never got on with anybody before,
I spent the night at her place and when it was time to go back to Berlin with
my mother, she accompanied us and stayed for a week. Ever since she proved
to be the best of friends one can imagine.
So, I guess, I'll be the last person to judge meeting someone over the internet
as weird.
i don't think it's that weird.
my best and longest friend everrrrr i met online. we were on the same tsr-style forum, spoke a bit on msn and realised we were going to the same places in our city with our separate friends so decided to meet up and ended up getting on ridiculously well, it's been four years and we see each other every week
i think the whole situation seems a bit different to your ex. without you explaining it, it could be interpreted that you were talking to some girl on the internet and planning to meet up with sexyyy intentions whilst you were still with your ex. other than the obvious jealousy and feeling a bit threatened, it's understandable that she still found it really weird. when you haven't sorta made friends with someone online yourself it can just seem SO freaky to make friends online and actually meet up with people because it's not the traditional old way of meeting people in real life and lots of people assume it's all completely anonymous and that the other person could be anyone(but obviously not if you're talking on the phone). before i met my friend, i thought it was dead freaky that people could acually be friends or talk on the phone with someone they'd never physically met, but now i know there's no reason why it's freaky!
my best and longest friend everrrrr i met online. we were on the same tsr-style forum, spoke a bit on msn and realised we were going to the same places in our city with our separate friends so decided to meet up and ended up getting on ridiculously well, it's been four years and we see each other every week
i think the whole situation seems a bit different to your ex. without you explaining it, it could be interpreted that you were talking to some girl on the internet and planning to meet up with sexyyy intentions whilst you were still with your ex. other than the obvious jealousy and feeling a bit threatened, it's understandable that she still found it really weird. when you haven't sorta made friends with someone online yourself it can just seem SO freaky to make friends online and actually meet up with people because it's not the traditional old way of meeting people in real life and lots of people assume it's all completely anonymous and that the other person could be anyone(but obviously not if you're talking on the phone). before i met my friend, i thought it was dead freaky that people could acually be friends or talk on the phone with someone they'd never physically met, but now i know there's no reason why it's freaky!
I don't see anything wrong with your developing the friendship you started with this girl online - if anything, your ex seems rather narrow-minded. That said, you're asking a bunch of people who spend a lot of time on TSR if meeting people from the internet is dodgy...so you may get a slightly biased view!
I've got loads of great friends on the internet. I've been to Cardiff a few times and have met up there with loads of awesome people. I wouldn't think twice about calling them my friends just because I met them online. They're exactly like my other friends, they just live somewhere else.
No. Socialising on the internet is like socialising with your family - as long as you socialise with other people as well, it's completely normal and fine.
coldfish
I don't see why it'd ever be weird to meet somebody in real life that you originally met on the internet. You're a person, they're people too. Meeting each other is what people do, occasionally. *shrug*
That basically sums it up just right!
I don't think it's weird. I've met quite a few people on the internet and have met up with 1 of them. And one of my best friends i met on the internet. However, i have been judged a lot for having friends on the internet and those people that judge are narrow minded and it frustrates me but there is absolutely nothing wrong with it
I met one of my closest friends via the internet. We knew each other for several years before we met. So, no, I definitely don't think you're weird at all. In fact, it's becoming more and more normal for internet friends to become real friends.
Maybe your ex has had a bad experience with an online friend? Her reaction seems rather over the top, especially considering she's not even your girlfriend any more.
Maybe your ex has had a bad experience with an online friend? Her reaction seems rather over the top, especially considering she's not even your girlfriend any more.
no not unless they are a real life computer nerd.....u know the ones with big glasses and selotape holding the glasses together!
dont worry i believe computer nerds are a rare breed!!
dont worry i believe computer nerds are a rare breed!!
You have pretty much summed her reaction to this situation up your self.
She's just simply narrow minded.-Just because you decide to meet up with someone of the internet for a casual drink after a year of knowing her do NOT make you the 'weirdo' in any way shape or form. It equals the same risk if you meet someone up whilst at a bar decided to take there number and texted them or chatted to them on MSN.
Just because you did'nt initially see her face at the first point of contact do not make you a weirdo .
She's just simply narrow minded.-Just because you decide to meet up with someone of the internet for a casual drink after a year of knowing her do NOT make you the 'weirdo' in any way shape or form. It equals the same risk if you meet someone up whilst at a bar decided to take there number and texted them or chatted to them on MSN.
Just because you did'nt initially see her face at the first point of contact do not make you a weirdo .
Well all I can say is it wasn't weird when my internet friend became my real friend, then later that day my real girlfriend, and now my real love.
Your ex is just being paranoid.
Your ex is just being paranoid.
It's not weird in the slightest. I met my best mate in the whole world and while we don't get to meet each other in real life as often as we'd like to, we share all our secrets and talk to each other on a daily basis.
Just because you're not physically next to someone all the time doesn't mean you can't have an emotional bond with them. It's not like you're talking to a robot or something.
Just because you're not physically next to someone all the time doesn't mean you can't have an emotional bond with them. It's not like you're talking to a robot or something.
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