The Student Room Group

Kinda cheated on m boyfriend - will he forgive me?

So a back story hopefully I’m not too TMI...im 20 and lost my virginity last year to a guy i was talking to. To be honest I knew we wouldn’t last but there was sexual chemistry there so I did it, pretty soon after we ended it. It was my first time, but he was more experienced and knew what he was doing, it felt good.

Fast forward a couple months and I got into my first relationship. My bf was a virgin and so I’m the first person that hes slept with. I loved him and we weren’t sexual for a few months, but once we were I noticed that the spark just wasn’t there and I’m never physically satisfied. Our intimate life is so boring.

I did love him and didn’t want to end it on that basis, but one night i was so desperate that I ended up sleeping with the first guy..(we live in the same apartment block for uni)

Now i dont know what to do, I instantly regretted it. But if I tell my boyfriend, he’ll dump me for sure and I’ll also be known as the cheat at uni. My own friends will abandon me. The night with this guy meant nothing I obviously was just sexually frustrated and needed to relieve it.

What can I do?

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1
Panic??
You know, sexual incompatibility is a pretty big factor as to why relationships fail. Even if you hadn't cheated, you probably would have left over this down the line if nothing had improved. Do yourself and your boyfriend a favour and just tell him. Him breaking up with you may be good for both of you.
What you did was kinda rude. I mean, you even said that this relationship doesn't fulfil you so why are you leading him on? I don't really understand what your motives are in this whole situation. Sounds to me that you're just a bit too excited over the sexual stuff and don't actually care about the relationship itself. You need to do the right thing and come forward and end it wth your bf so he can go and be with someone who actually loves him - someone who is faithful as well. You're hurting him even more by being in a relationship with him - go and get with the first guy instead.
Reply 4
Tell your boyfriend. It's not just your decision to make as to whether the relationship continues, and it shouldn't continue with a massive lie. You have effectively ended it on the basis of your boyfriend doesn't satisfy you.

If you stay together, what are you going to do the next time you have sexual urges, cheat again?
Who thinks this is real?
Reply 6
Oh yh forgot to mention - you didn’t “kinda” cheat, you cheated.
how is sleeping with someone else only “kinda” cheating on your boyfriend??

you should just end it with your boyfriend. you aren’t compatible sexually and you aren’t ever going to be satisfied which will probably end up with you cheating again which isn’t fair to him.
I was here to see how you kinda cheated. I viewed what I did as cheating so wondered if it was that.

It wasn't.
Original post by Anonymous
So a back story hopefully I’m not too TMI...im 20 and lost my virginity last year to a guy i was talking to. To be honest I knew we wouldn’t last but there was sexual chemistry there so I did it, pretty soon after we ended it. It was my first time, but he was more experienced and knew what he was doing, it felt good.

Fast forward a couple months and I got into my first relationship. My bf was a virgin and so I’m the first person that hes slept with. I loved him and we weren’t sexual for a few months, but once we were I noticed that the spark just wasn’t there and I’m never physically satisfied. Our intimate life is so boring.

I did love him and didn’t want to end it on that basis, but one night i was so desperate that I ended up sleeping with the first guy..(we live in the same apartment block for uni)

Now i dont know what to do, I instantly regretted it. But if I tell my boyfriend, he’ll dump me for sure and I’ll also be known as the cheat at uni. My own friends will abandon me. The night with this guy meant nothing I obviously was just sexually frustrated and needed to relieve it.

What can I do?


Kinda cheated??

You kinda cheated??

What's cheating without the Kinda? no sis you cheated cheated..

Kinda cheated is when you accidentally flirt with someone and you regret it or kissing someone else coz you're drunk..

I just don't know how to advise you other than do the right thing.
Another squirrel picked their nuts from your cache. Obviously the resident squirrel should know, or he might find out in the future in which case the fallout will be worse.

Just tell him. :_:
Original post by Surnia
Tell your boyfriend. It's not just your decision to make as to whether the relationship continues, and it shouldn't continue with a massive lie. You have effectively ended it on the basis of your boyfriend doesn't satisfy you.

If you stay together, what are you going to do the next time you have sexual urges, cheat again?


I just want my boyfriend to improve, emotionally we are so compatible
Original post by MadameRazz
how is sleeping with someone else only “kinda” cheating on your boyfriend??

you should just end it with your boyfriend. you aren’t compatible sexually and you aren’t ever going to be satisfied which will probably end up with you cheating again which isn’t fair to him.


It didnt mean anything thats why
Original post by Anonymous
It didnt mean anything thats why


no thats very wrong. you’ve said it yourself. your boyfriend can’t pleasure you. it means you seek pleasure from other people and cheat on him. it means you need to break up. its not rocket science.
Original post by Anonymous
So a back story hopefully I’m not too TMI...im 20 and lost my virginity last year to a guy i was talking to. To be honest I knew we wouldn’t last but there was sexual chemistry there so I did it, pretty soon after we ended it. It was my first time, but he was more experienced and knew what he was doing, it felt good.

Fast forward a couple months and I got into my first relationship. My bf was a virgin and so I’m the first person that hes slept with. I loved him and we weren’t sexual for a few months, but once we were I noticed that the spark just wasn’t there and I’m never physically satisfied. Our intimate life is so boring.

I did love him and didn’t want to end it on that basis, but one night i was so desperate that I ended up sleeping with the first guy..(we live in the same apartment block for uni)

Now i dont know what to do, I instantly regretted it. But if I tell my boyfriend, he’ll dump me for sure and I’ll also be known as the cheat at uni. My own friends will abandon me. The night with this guy meant nothing I obviously was just sexually frustrated and needed to relieve it.

What can I do?


tbh its not rlly kinda cheating on ur boyfriend...
Reply 15
Original post by Anonymous
I just want my boyfriend to improve, emotionally we are so compatible

Sorry, who needs to improve? You are the one who cheated!

If that's what you want you discuss it with your boyfriend, not have meaningless sex with someone else...
ur bf did not deserve tht :/ cheating is unjustifiable and i can't believe u put him through tht.. i guess the least u could do is tell him the truth and then leave everything to him.
Original post by MadameRazz
no thats very wrong. you’ve said it yourself. your boyfriend can’t pleasure you. it means you seek pleasure from other people and cheat on him. it means you need to break up. its not rocket science.


Nooo we dont need to break up he just needs to improve!!
Original post by Surnia
Sorry, who needs to improve? You are the one who cheated!

If that's what you want you discuss it with your boyfriend, not have meaningless sex with someone else...


By improve i mean improve in terms of sex, not him as a person!
Original post by Anonymous
Nooo we dont need to break up he just needs to improve!!


break up. you’re a cheater and a terrible person.

Quick Reply