Told my teacher I was s*xually assaulted and she said she has to tell other teachers

Watch
Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
So I told my teacher after school about an old sexual assault and about going therapy and she was really sweet and listened and everything. The only reason I told her was to ask her whether she thinks I should go therapy on top of a levels as I know it will be a lot to take mentally and I don’t think I’m ready. She said I should try. I told her I thought I was getting better apart from a panic attack I had in year 8 from having detention with a male teacher. She told me she has to make the other teachers aware of this and she’s going to log it into the system ?!!!

I’m so scared because I don’t want other teachers to know. I feel betrayed because I didn’t want this. I don’t want to be pitied by my teachers or for them to treat me differently. I don’t want them to know. She told me not to worry.
0
reply
BurstingBubbles
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
So I told my teacher after school about an old sexual assault and about going therapy and she was really sweet and listened and everything. The only reason I told her was to ask her whether she thinks I should go therapy on top of a levels as I know it will be a lot to take mentally and I don’t think I’m ready. She said I should try. I told her I thought I was getting better apart from a panic attack I had in year 8 from having detention with a male teacher. She told me she has to make the other teachers aware of this and she’s going to log it into the system ?!!!

I’m so scared because I don’t want other teachers to know. I feel betrayed because I didn’t want this. I don’t want to be pitied by my teachers or for them to treat me differently. I don’t want them to know. She told me not to worry.
It's a safeguarding concern, especially if you're under the age of 16. She has a duty to report it I think. Other teachers knowing won't mean that they pity you, it'll mean they can put things in place to support you and make you feel more comfortable. You did well by talking to your teacher
12
reply
threeportdrift
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#3
Report 1 month ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
So I told my teacher after school about an old sexual assault and about going therapy and she was really sweet and listened and everything. The only reason I told her was to ask her whether she thinks I should go therapy on top of a levels as I know it will be a lot to take mentally and I don’t think I’m ready. She said I should try. I told her I thought I was getting better apart from a panic attack I had in year 8 from having detention with a male teacher. She told me she has to make the other teachers aware of this and she’s going to log it into the system ?!!!

I’m so scared because I don’t want other teachers to know. I feel betrayed because I didn’t want this. I don’t want to be pitied by my teachers or for them to treat me differently. I don’t want them to know. She told me not to worry.
She's only going to tell the lead teacher responsible for safeguarding in your school, she's legally obliged to do that. But that's as far as it goes in specific detail. If anything needs to be passed on to other teachers, then it is passed on without the details, ie other teachers you work with might be told they should watch out for signs you are upset, or having a panic attack etc, but not why, and they know not to ask/need to know why.

They won't know the details or pity you, they will just be more aware of situations that might upset you, and for the next detention (!) might make sure there's a female teacher, for example.
5
reply
Anonymous #2
#4
Report 1 month ago
#4
(Original post by BurstingBubbles)
It's a safeguarding concern, especially if you're under the age of 16. She has a duty to report it I think. Other teachers knowing won't mean that they pity you, it'll mean they can put things in place to support you and make you feel more comfortable. You did well by talking to your teacher
telling other teachers isn't reporting it though...
1
reply
BurstingBubbles
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#5
Report 1 month ago
#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
telling other teachers isn't reporting it though...
It depends how many in total e.g. how many are senior leaders/designated safeguarding (especially if it's a large school/academy).
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#6
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#6
(Original post by threeportdrift)
She's only going to tell the lead teacher responsible for safeguarding in your school, she's legally obliged to do that. But that's as far as it goes in specific detail. If anything needs to be passed on to other teachers, then it is passed on without the details, ie other teachers you work with might be told they should watch out for signs you are upset, or having a panic attack etc, but not why, and they know not to ask/need to know why.

They won't know the details or pity you, they will just be more aware of situations that might upset you, and for the next detention (!) might make sure there's a female teacher, for example.
Ok Thankyou
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#7
Report 1 month ago
#7
(Original post by BurstingBubbles)
It depends how many in total e.g. how many are senior leaders/designated safeguarding (especially if it's a large school/academy).
reporting to social services would make more sense
0
reply
BurstingBubbles
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8
Report 1 month ago
#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
reporting to social services would make more sense
It may be that they do but they have to follow policy first which would be to report it to the school safeguarding teacher/team. Depends on age etc. too. Should be reported to the police. If OP is over 16 or 18, I can't remember which, then it's up to OP to decide and consent to report it further.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#9
(Original post by BurstingBubbles)
It may be that they do but they have to follow policy first which would be to report it to the school safeguarding teacher/team. Depends on age etc. too. Should be reported to the police. If OP is over 16 or 18, I can't remember which, then it's up to OP to decide and consent to report it further.
I am 16 so is the teacher in the wrong because she didn’t ask what I wanted?
0
reply
BurstingBubbles
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#10
Report 1 month ago
#10
(Original post by Anonymous)
I am 16 so is the teacher in the wrong because she didn’t ask what I wanted?
No they still have a duty of care to report it to the safeguarding team. I can't remember whether it is over 16 or 18 where they would have to get your consent to report it further (e.g. the police/social services). If you're worried then ask your teacher
Last edited by BurstingBubbles; 1 month ago
0
reply
hobba
Badges: 7
Rep:
?
#11
Report 1 month ago
#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
I am 16 so is the teacher in the wrong because she didn’t ask what I wanted?
I am sure your school has a document somewhere on the procedure to be followed in cases like this. Best to consult that first.
0
reply
shebk
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#12
Report 1 month ago
#12
Did the male teacher sexual assault you?
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#13
(Original post by shebk)
Did the male teacher sexual assault you?
Oh no no, he was just doing detention with me
0
reply
tashkent46
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#14
Report 1 month ago
#14
(Original post by BurstingBubbles)
No they still have a duty of care to report it to the safeguarding team. I can't remember whether it is over 16 or 18 where they would have to get your consent to report it further (e.g. the police/social services). If you're worried then ask your teacher
It's anyone classed as a child (the Gillick competence test is sometimes used to decide if they can give consent) and only applies to children afaik. If you're not Gillick competent or an adult the rules are different (under 16s and non-Gillick cannot make decisions for themselves and over 16s are adults so the onus is on them beyond the immediate safeguarding concerns of the school)
Last edited by tashkent46; 1 month ago
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#15
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#15
I’m quite sure she’s told my maths teacher because normally he makes jokes with me but today he was just looking at me funny like in a sad way and asked me if I was alright??
0
reply
threeportdrift
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#16
Report 1 month ago
#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m quite sure she’s told my maths teacher because normally he makes jokes with me but today he was just looking at me funny like in a sad way and asked me if I was alright??
She absolutely hasn't told him the details, in fact, she hasn't spoken to him at all, it doesn't work like that. When any student discloses anything that is a safeguarding issue, the teacher only tells the safeguarding lead.

Every school has one central safeguarding lead, but large schools may have one or two assistants. Everything goes through the safeguarding lead, and they are the person that gathers all reports and can see if there is any pattern around a specific student, member of staff, activity etc.

The safeguarding lead then makes a decision as to whether anyone else needs some sort of informing, ie social services, the police, or even in the staff room. If for example a student has disclosed an issue that means they are struggling in class, and are breaking down at times, having panic attacks etc, then the safeguarding lead is likely to tell the relevant teaching staff for that student that there is an issue that might create those behaviours. They don't say anything about the cause, and staff know not to ask, but they are told about the possible effects so they can be alert to the situation.
0
reply
Anonymous #3
#17
Report 1 month ago
#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
So I told my teacher after school about an old sexual assault and about going therapy and she was really sweet and listened and everything. The only reason I told her was to ask her whether she thinks I should go therapy on top of a levels as I know it will be a lot to take mentally and I don’t think I’m ready. She said I should try. I told her I thought I was getting better apart from a panic attack I had in year 8 from having detention with a male teacher. She told me she has to make the other teachers aware of this and she’s going to log it into the system ?!!!

I’m so scared because I don’t want other teachers to know. I feel betrayed because I didn’t want this. I don’t want to be pitied by my teachers or for them to treat me differently. I don’t want them to know. She told me not to worry.
hiya, i'm really sorry to hear about your situation. I am aware that other people knowing about this scares you and i thought that you may wanna hear what i think would be a good way around this situation.
The teacher in a way is doing the right thing, but in the wrong way. I think she just wants to make sure you don't end up in a situation where you become frightened around a male staff and wants to ensure that there is always a female staff to safe guard you. I believe if you spoke to her maybe you could arrange a way for her to keep your mind at piece, knowing others are there for you but not being explicit on what happened.
I think it would advantage you for others knowing to keep an eye out for you but not exactly why, putting it on the system doesn't seem necessary as it goes against your privacy and is rather unethical in general from the schools side, they shouldn't publicize personal information and you could definitely argue your way out of this one.
0
reply
hootdoot04
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#18
Report 1 month ago
#18
It’s a safeguarding issue so, under law they must report it.
0
reply
shebk
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#19
Report 1 month ago
#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
Oh no no, he was just doing detention with me
Who sexually assaulted you?
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#20
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#20
(Original post by shebk)
Who sexually assaulted you?
My mums partner like 6 years ago
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you experienced financial difficulties as a student due to Covid-19?

Yes, I have really struggled financially (84)
18.58%
I have experienced some financial difficulties (128)
28.32%
I haven't experienced any financial difficulties and things have stayed the same (166)
36.73%
I have had better financial opportunities as a result of the pandemic (60)
13.27%
I've had another experience (let us know in the thread!) (14)
3.1%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed