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Caught bf out - how to approach situation

Long story short found out my ‘fiancée’ has been hiding me for 2 years. We have kids and live together. One of his female friends called me telling me they’ve been friends for 2 years and he’s never once told her we are together or in relationship. She told me how he usually goes to her place 3x a week, tells her about all the girls that he’s talking to etc etc and he even made a big lie up about how we met and I just got randomly pregnant and couldn’t get abortion (even though we’ve been together 6 years and were actively trying for a baby).

Now I’m trying to think the best way to approach the situation with him. I haven’t mentioned anything at all but the girl said she’d come to mine so that she can confirm everything he’s been saying and can’t deny anything. She suggested it and said she’d do whatever I want however now I’ve been asking her to come and I feel like she isn’t really into it. Issue is tomorrow is his last day home before he goes back to work and he won’t be around to have this discussion. I asked her to come over on Sunday but she was staying at her boyfriends for 2 nights so said she couldn’t. I then asked her last night if she’s free over next few days to come over she said sure but that was it. I don’t want to seem like I’m pestering her but tomorrow’s my last opportunity.

Any advice on how to handle this situation? Obviously over these 2 years he’s been badmouthing me to her so she didn’t have a great outlook on me, so even though I’ve told her the true story and she says I sound like a lovely girl, I still don’t want to be pestering her and look actually crazy. I just feel this is the best way to approach the situation because he’s brought her into this by always lying about her and talking bad about me to her and always going to her place and lying. So I need her to be able to confirm what he’s said otherwise he’ll lie no matter what

Reply 1

HoldThisL

is it possible she's lying? you've suggested she doesn't like you + spends a lot of time with him - it's entirely possible she's trying to break you up and, as far as you've said, you haven't investigated whether she's telling the truth

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by HoldThisL

Yeah so I completely get why you’d think that. It sounds like that but she has proven all the things she’s said. I’ve spoken to her a couple times over the last year and she’s always had a boyfriend and would always ask to meet me and be friends and would tell me she doesn’t understand why my fiancée hides me etc. She’s s sent me all the screenshots, showed me all the messages and literally told me she went through the same thing with her ex so she’ll support me whatever I need. She’s definitely not trying to break us up as she’s actually kept quiet it’s only now I contacted her for something she told me she’s noticed some things about my fiancée and called me to explain everything. My fiancée would spend a lot of time at hers but that would be regardless if her boyfriend was there, or her friends etc so there was nothing between them