Couples breaking up, friendships turning sour during lockdown??

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Anonymous #1
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Why has this been a trend? I heard these stories before but now one of my very close friends who were together since 2015 split yesterday. They lived together and everything was great so this was a shocking news.

Many friendships also either faded away or had issues and couples who weren't living together but were still in a relationship, broke up after they started living together .

Whats going on?
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idonthaveaname1223
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Why has this been a trend? I heard these stories before but now one of my very close friends who were together since 2015 split yesterday. They lived together and everything was great so this was a shocking news.

Many friendships also either faded away or had issues and couples who weren't living together but were still in a relationship, broke up after they started living together .

Whats going on?
I think that people realised that their so’s we not what they needed. Corona made everyone take a step back & so most people reflected. When they weren’t up to date with the stresses of life (working, tired, ext) they were able to see those around them for who they really were. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, it’s part of moving on!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by idonthaveaname1223)
I think that people realised that their so’s we not what they needed. Corona made everyone take a step back & so most people reflected. When they weren’t up to date with the stresses of life (working, tired, ext) they were able to see those around them for who they really were. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, it’s part of moving on!
But didn't they already know they weren't right for each other?
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Anonymous #1
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Bumppp
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idonthaveaname1223
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(Original post by Anonymous)
But didn't they already know they weren't right for each other?
Maybe they were trying to work it out? And corona just highlighted the fact that they shouldn’t
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DanB1991
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It's simply because you're having to spend time together 24/7, quite literally. Previously even if you lived together you had other outlets and could easily ignore things that annoyed you.

Previously you'd have work, out of house hobbies, social events etc giving a bit of breathing room. A manageable minor difference can become much more pronounced in lockdown.

The longer a couple has been together the more likely this is not fixable, and once things turn sour you can't really turn back. Thus we're seeing the end of longer term relationships with relationship counsellors staying it's to be expected and there's not much you can do about it.

By comparison those same counsellors are trying to persuade newer relationships to ride it out because of the exceptional circumstances. If it's a younger relationship these disagreements are more likely to do with miscommunication or resolvable issues that are accentuated by the excessive time spent together. They generally would not be guaranteed to appear as the relationship goes on and are unlikely to permanently damage the relationship.

However the problem they've noticed is people in newer relationships are unlikely to use Counsellors. Secondly, lockdown potentially can completely annihilate the "honeymoon" period, meaning people are extremely demotivated and tend to completely give up on the relationship.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by DanB1991)
It's simply because you're having to spend time together 24/7, quite literally. Previously even if you lived together you had other outlets and could easily ignore things that annoyed you.

Previously you'd have work, out of house hobbies, social events etc giving a bit of breathing room. A manageable minor difference can become much more pronounced in lockdown.

The longer a couple has been together the more likely this is not fixable, and once things turn sour you can't really turn back. Thus we're seeing the end of longer term relationships with relationship counsellors staying it's to be expected and there's not much you can do about it.

By comparison those same counsellors are trying to persuade newer relationships to ride it out because of the exceptional circumstances. If it's a younger relationship these disagreements are more likely to do with miscommunication or resolvable issues that are accentuated by the excessive time spent together. They generally would not be guaranteed to appear as the relationship goes on and are unlikely to permanently damage the relationship.

However the problem they've noticed is people in newer relationships are unlikely to use Counsellors. Secondly, lockdown potentially can completely annihilate the "honeymoon" period, meaning people are extremely demotivated and tend to completely give up on the relationship.
But why would annihilate honeymoon period? Wouldn't it give more time to spend, get romantic and sexy???
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Anonymous #1
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Bump
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DanB1991
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(Original post by Anonymous)
But why would annihilate honeymoon period? Wouldn't it give more time to spend, get romantic and sexy???
Because that's not how it works. The more time you spend together the faster the honeymoon period burns out. Especially if a minor annoyance (which is magnified in lockdown) is brought to the forefront or minor disagreements occur.

Also too much of something can make it burn out faster.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by DanB1991)
Because that's not how it works. The more time you spend together the faster the honeymoon period burns out. Especially if a minor annoyance (which is magnified in lockdown) is brought to the forefront or minor disagreements occur.

Also too much of something can make it burn out faster.
I see. I thought more time meant more romance and intimacy
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by DanB1991)
Because that's not how it works. The more time you spend together the faster the honeymoon period burns out. Especially if a minor annoyance (which is magnified in lockdown) is brought to the forefront or minor disagreements occur.

Also too much of something can make it burn out faster.
(Original post by Anonymous)
I see. I thought more time meant more romance and intimacy
Afd what about those who were more of an LDR , lacking emotional connection and more of a sex and fun based? What if relationship like this started living together during lockdown 2.0? Would they also have the same problem?

Because as long as they were LDR, it was easy to override the attitudinal problems and guessing it had "newness" since they had intervals of a few weeks or months so problems were scarce and lot of social life with same friends and other stuff to keep them occupied?
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Anonymous #1
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I'm sad this thread didn't take off :/
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quackxk
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I see. I thought more time meant more romance and intimacy
as an introvert, sometimes more time spent together = less personal space which I hate. there was a period of time when I spent almost every single day with my bf and after a while I got really irritable and started to find excuses to not see him, even though I love him a lot. it took us a while to figure out what was going on, but I realised it was mainly because I felt that i was given enough time to myself and just be in my zone. I guess living together may prevent couples from giving each other personal space especially in the first few months when living together is still new, unless they have already established and understand what boundaries that each person has. just an introvert's perspective on this!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by quackxk)
as an introvert, sometimes more time spent together = less personal space which I hate. there was a period of time when I spent almost every single day with my bf and after a while I got really irritable and started to find excuses to not see him, even though I love him a lot. it took us a while to figure out what was going on, but I realised it was mainly because I felt that i was given enough time to myself and just be in my zone. I guess living together may prevent couples from giving each other personal space especially in the first few months when living together is still new, unless they have already established and understand what boundaries that each person has. just an introvert's perspective on this!
Interesting

What about this type of situation?

(Original post by Anonymous)
Afd what about those who were more of an LDR , lacking emotional connection and more of a sex and fun based? What if relationship like this started living together during lockdown 2.0? Would they also have the same problem?

Because as long as they were LDR, it was easy to override the attitudinal problems and guessing it had "newness" since they had intervals of a few weeks or months so problems were scarce and lot of social life with same friends and other stuff to keep them occupied?
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