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I want to drop out of uni

Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!
(edited 3 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!

Aww babe this makes me so sad you aint a failure you did amazing at A level and throughout school uni is tough like hella tough so don't get dishearted its only the start you can defo improve. Its like when we first started A levels we were getting Ds etc.
(edited 3 years ago)
honestly if it affecting ur mental health you can't stay its 3 years doing something u don't enjoy.
I think you should drop out and follow your heart!!! Speak to your uni first and you can still apply for 2021 entry now! Or you can take a gap year and do 2022 entry, whichever makes you feel comfortable and will restore you to being you again :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!


I make the following observations, although it would be better to interview you, but thats not possible.

1. If you are feeling really depressed , then I suggest you either speak to:
- Childline 0800 1111
- Samaritans 116 123
- Papyrus HOPElineUK: 0800 068 41 41
Papyrus-uk.org
Support for those dealing with suicide, depression or emotional distress – particularly teenagers and young adults.
- The Mix. 0808 808 4994. Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm. webchat Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm, and Saturday from 8pm to 11pm.
- Your uni should have a nightline helpline where you can talk to a student volunteer anonymously.
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 5
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by SparkleFace
I think you should drop out and follow your heart!!! Speak to your uni first and you can still apply for 2021 entry now! Or you can take a gap year and do 2022 entry, whichever makes you feel comfortable and will restore you to being you again :smile:

Thank you so much, the more I think about it the more I know this is the right thing to do.
Drop out and do pharmacy.
Reply 7
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by 999tigger
I make the following observations, although it would be better to interview you, but thats not possible.

1. If you are feeling really depressed , then I suggest you either speak to:
- Childline 0800 1111
- Samaritans 116 123
- Papyrus HOPElineUK: 0800 068 41 41
Papyrus-uk.org
Support for those dealing with suicide, depression or emotional distress – particularly teenagers and young adults.
- The Mix. 0808 808 4994. Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm. webchat Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm, and Saturday from 8pm to 11pm.
- Your uni should have a nightline helpline where you can talk to a student volunteer anonymously.

Thank you so so much! This is the biggest help :smile:
How old are you?
100% if your not happy, drop out of your course and apply for pharmacy :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
How old are you?

I am 18
Original post by Anonymous
I am 18

You are young still
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!


I make the following observations, although it would be better to interview you, but thats not possible.

1. If you are feeling really depressed , then I suggest you either speak to:
- Childline 0800 1111
- Samaritans 116 123
- Papyrus HOPElineUK: 0800 068 41 41
Papyrus-uk.org
Support for those dealing with suicide, depression or emotional distress – particularly teenagers and young adults.
- The Mix. 0808 808 4994. Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm. webchat Sunday to Friday from 2pm to 11pm, and Saturday from 8pm to 11pm.
- Your uni should have a nightline helpline where you can talk to a student volunteer anonymously.

As for what to do, then it seems clear you absoliutely hate th4e course and no degree is worth 3/4/5 years of misery and tears, so if its getting you down that much then you need a plan.

1. Make sure its really the course and not the uni or cv19- talk to your personal tutor and check wiuth uni health services. Some people are having a surreal experience due to CV 19 limitations stamping on their uni experience. As you explained it was a course you didnt want and you hate it looks unlikely it seems saveable. It is important to go through the process though.

2. If you have decided to leave, then you should do so in an ordered fashing to ensure your extraction is the easiest. If your MH is as bad as you say, then you must talk to uni support services and see them, plus you must relay this to your GP practice and get a letter confirmung your fragile MH.

3. You then take the letter and id the formal withdrawal procedure from uni (normally a form on the wesbsite) you will need to get that signed to be formally released from the course. Normally its just the department and tutor plus they confirm why and that you realise the implications. Submit that and keep a copy or the originbal. This is important.

4. You will then need to tell sfe or the uni will and you cease to be entitled to general funding from the moment you cease to be a student. This makes timing important, especially if you have no money.

5. Its a good thing you are living at home, because you dont have to worry about accommodation and getting out of a contract.

6. Chill out and stop worrying once youve read this gudiance as being miserable wont make it go any faster or be more effective.

7. Timing is important for student finance because when you let them know the money stops. Note:
i) Telling them before second term starts will let you avoid incurring fees for term ( £2500/ 5000?) 2. Also means you wont get a second loan cheque.
ii) Telling them after second term starts means you will incur loan fees for term 2, but you also get the next maintenance loan.

The moment you tell them you cease to be entitled to money you have whilst not a student, so if the term is 12 weeks l,long and you quit after 1 week you get to keep 1 weeks money and the rest they will ask for it back. If you quit 6 weeks in, thenb you would keep 6/12 weeks of that money and be asked to return 6/12 weeks. You are at a major advantage because you dont have to worry about accommodation.

8. In addition to the above if you need the loan money but dont want to be a student, then there are 2 methods to enhance it.
i) Spend it and when they come looking for it point out you dont have it and agree a repayment plan. Thats a bit cheeky but for some people its needs must, normally if you have accommodation to pay.
ii) Make a compelling personal reasons claim to SFE on the basis of your MH forcing you out of the course, whereby you will have a GP note and all the evidence. You can ask for a discretionary payment of up to 60 days.
iii) when you cease to be a student you should continue signing on for UC, which takes 5 weeks to get and you must be available to look for work.

9. So really thats all you need to do to leave your course properly and deal with finance. If you intend to leave before term 2 starts you must get the GPs letter asap and submit the form before term 2 starts. You will not get the second loan check, paying attention to the pros and cons of exactly when you leave. To be continued with careers and parent advice etc........
(edited 3 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!


More observations: part 2.

10. . Now is a time for reflection and to feel you are in control. Your home life seems to be far from ideal, but it doesnt appear like you mum will throw you on the street. Get the GP letter and discuss with uni when leaving. Tell them about your parents likely reaction and they may back you up confirming you are unhappy and ill suited to the course, so they support your idea that you should leave and with your A levels you will have a choice of course. They can confirm if you are unsiuited or unhappy its inlikely you will do well and you are better off doing a course you are interested in for your health and career success. Your PT may or may not be willing to do that.

11. You would use the above to fend off your mum and dad. he isnt any sort of dad and worth ignoring if he doesnt put your happiness and healthy development first. he is an either an asset and supportive or a hinderance dragging you down. If he isnt going to help ignore him.

12. Deal with parents by showing them its medical and academic advice to leave i.e the Uni and GP support you, then the second defence is showing parents you have another plan. Ultimately you are playing for time to 1: get your MH together and 2. Make good career choices.

13. You can get your MH to a better place by taking control and leaving the course. It makes you unhappy, you hate it and you would be insane to wnat to complete the other 90%, when you have other options. The only issue is timing for money (as explained) to get your MH back and to make an informed career decision.

14. You should feel a lot less stressed and be able to breathe when you have left, plus you have to fend off your parents. The next stage is to decide how to make an iformed choice. Be aware the deadline for UCAS and 2021 starts are on 15 Jan, so you should be preparing your UCAS application again for then. Possible but you also have to get the reference, so contact your referee,

15. Because this is all last minute it is rushed, but as your first experience shows its important you make the right choice, of uni and subject. You should also consider whether you wish to stay at home or go somewhere else. It has pros and cons. You might be happoer being independent but you could also be isolated if you dont make friends and it will be more expensive. Lots of students crashing out are finding this out and cv19 means the student experience is poor.

16. The dilemma is you seem fixed on pharamacy now, but if you make the deadline and put the application in then it prevcents you putting different choices in after the deadline. With your grades you will more or less have your choice of unis and courses. It is important to get both right.

17. Pharmacy is a somewhat controversial choice imo as the last time I looked the market was absolutely saturated with grads and the career options and salaries were limited. There are many detailed posts on the pharmacy sub forum about this and you should speak to pharmacy grads about this. You should know what you are letting yourself in for. For myself I would not choose phamacy, but find out more.

18. If I had fended my parents off , then would be working on a threefold plan:

1. Get my MH sorted out so I was resilent enough to deal with life and uni. You cannot perform at your best if you are miserable or depressed. You would also look at beefing up your social skills as if you wnat to make friends but dont have the skills to do so, then you might find yourself without. All these aspects seem to come together for someone in your situation.

2. We talked about fending the parents off and what you need is breathing space. For that I would get a job, just to get an income or do an apprenticeship to give you space and help you make an informed choice. It will also help with MH and social skills plus get you out of the house. If it was relevant to pharamacy then you cvould also decide if it was for you or not.

3. I am in favour of you taking the 1 or 2 year gap years to help you figure things out and feel that if you got 1 and 2, then you would be in a much better place and in control of your life. The danger at the moment is you rush into another course when you arent ready MH wise and you arent making an informed choice about pharmacy. If you have an apprenticeship or a job, then I imagine you will get less hassle from parents and tbh apart fromy our mum whi cna mkick you out, then if you have an income you cna for the most part start contributing and ignore them, especially your dad. This would get you to a stable and healing place. It would also remove a lot of the chaos from your life.


Careers and stuff to follow.....
(edited 3 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so I am in a really bad situation and have no idea what to do, I feel like I’m going to go crazy. I started a bioveterinary sciences course at university this September and I have absolutely hated every minute of it. I’ve been living at home and have developed severe depression over the past few months. My mental health has completely deteriorated. I don’t really have any family apart from my mum who I don’t get along that well with. The only reason I applied to this course is because I was basically pushed into it by my dad, when I had originally planned to take a gap year/two years because I didn’t fully know what I wanted to do with my life, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure. All I know is I’m on the wrong course and I really don’t want to do it any longer. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I’m just in a really bad state right now and I rushing into a course that I didn’t even look into properly was a huge mistake. Even though I’ve always liked science and maths, and I got 3 A*s at A level, Ive just had no motivation this first term and I just received the grade for my first assignment at uni and I barely scraped a pass :frown: I feel like the biggest failure ever, I honestly just don’t know what to do. I hate my life so much. I am looking into pharmacy as I’ve always been interested in nutrition/medicine but I didn’t realise this until a few weeks ago when someone suggested that to me.
I feel so so stuck and I am so lost and depressed. Please someone help me!
Should I drop out and then apply for pharmacy? Or should I stick it out for these three years now that I’m on the course?
Help!


More observations and gudiance part 3.

19. You need to do what you should have done whilst you were choosing your A levels and that is to carefully consider what careers or which courses will suit you and where. By all means do Pharmacy, but make sure you know the pros and cons. Do not jump from one usuitable course to another as funding is limited and its importnat to get it right.

20.Your A levels give you choice. As long as you can put in a reasonable applicationm then you could in theory go to any top uni, so think carefully about whether you want to stay at home and weigh up the pros and cons. This years student experience seems to be pants, but with the vaccine it will be better in 2021 and Id think normal in 2022. Different unis and courses have different characters, some may suot you and others may not. If you are living at home then your chopice may be llimited, just think about the pros and cons. This year especially lost of students have found it to be a really poor choice to leave home, not just bercause of cv19, but ebcause they didnt get on with flatmates. Importnat you understand both sides.

21 start from the beginning and look at the following. You cna get soemof these for Christmas or just buy second hand copies yourself.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/What-Rocks-World-Jenny-Mullins/dp/1492153281

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Do-What-You-Are-Personality/dp/0316167266


https://www.amazon.co.uk/What-Color-Parachute-Teens-Third/dp/1607745771/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

They are all there to help you understand about what sort of things you like and move you to the sorts of careers you might be an ideal fit for. Once you understand yourself to this depth then choosing a course becomes much easier.

22. You can select courses to explore by using the following:

What degree course?
https://sacu-student.com/?page_id=5203
https://www.theuniguide.co.uk/a-level-explorer



Its up to you to investigate the course and uni, but you should do so throughly .

23. The alternative way of looking at it is to look at possible careers and employment prospects to make sure you have a use for your degree at the end.
You can take a look at these:

Which career?
https://www.prospects.ac.uk/careers-...with-my-degree
Career profiles
https://www.planitplus.net/JobProfiles?letter=A
https://nationalcareersservice.direct.gov.uk/job-profiles/home


.24. If you work your wway through all that it should mean.

•

You have left uni.

•

You have sorted out the best possible finance.

•

You have got the evidence which you cna use for later student finance applications and could be worth thousands.

•

You have got the most from term 2 in terms of money plus discretionary payment.

•

You have something to defend your choices against your parents.

•

You have left uni and are no longer miserable with that as a source.

•

You have an interim plan on how to survive financially and fend off your parents plus create some breathing space.

•

You know you need to work on your MH to get to a better place.

•

You will have spend enough time on reseraching which uni and which course plus which career.

•

You can put in an UCAS application to terst it out for 2021 with the knowledge applying doesnt mean you have to accept.

•

You should feel a lot more confident in your informed choices and happier you are in control of your future rather than looking back unhappy and regretful because you made the wrong choices, want to the wrong place, studied the wrong thing. You only get one life so dont sleepwalk into bad decisions. It requires you to make effort and if you do the above, then your decisions may not guarantee success or happiness, but you will know they were your choices to make and you did the best you could. That means no regrets.


If you follow that it should work and its what I would do to give myself the best chance
Good luck. Going to sleep now..
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 15
Avatar for Dintem
Dintem
1
You need to talk to someone about how you are feeling. Sounds like you should drop out take a break and really think about the next step / degree you really want to take. Have a look at work aways for a 6 month break somewhere. Life is really great but it can be hard at times, believe me I know . Take care.
fix your relationship with your family first. family is always and forever. you need to feel the warm in your heart first then you can see the next pattern. hope your day gets better.

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