can someone explain how much i would get for this Macbeth essay?

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nivi27
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Question:- How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?

In the eponymous tragedy, Macbeth, Shakespeare presents the character of Macbeth as someone who is extremely violent from the outset of the play. This is due to how he is described by the captain. Furthermore, in act 4, the audience sees that Macbeth accepts that violence leads to more violence. He eventually ends up in a vicious cycle of violence that leads to his downfall. Additionally, Macbeth’s last actions are brutal and filled with violence this shows the audience that Macbeth is prepared to spill more blood right up until his last breath.

From the beginning of the play, Shakespeare presents Macbeth as a very violent and blood thirsty character. The graphic imagery depicted when Macbeth is described to have “his brandished steel, which smoked with bloody execution” not only paints him to be brutal but also foreshadows that Macbeth is a character who mercilessly kills. The verb” “smoked” alludes to the fresh, hot blood of Macbeth’s victims on his sword. Additionally, “bloody execution” implies that Macbeth enjoys killing and suggests that he is heartless from the starting point of the play. The Jacobean audience would have thought that Macbeth’s actions were not significant as in Shakespeare’s time, it was very common to have violent battles. This was mainly due to kings being hungry for land and minerals. This therefore ended up resulting in a brutal battle. The phrase “unseamed him from the nave” shows his bloodlust and savage nature. The verb “unseamed” provides violent imagery as to how Macbeth killed his enemies. From this verb we can infer that Macbeth is almost unstitching God’s creation. Due to the Jacobean era being very religious, they would have considered Macbeth’s action’s to be almost blasphemous as no one had the right to destroy God’s creation. By doing this, Shakespeare shows the audience that Macbeth is a character who is unafraid to go against God. No matter how violent the outcome is, he is going to do anything to become the King of Scotland. In contrast to the Jacobean audience, the modern audience would be extremely surprised at Macbeth, this is because violent acts are frowned upon in today’s society.

Macbeth is seen to accept the fact that there will be consequences to his violent actions. The bloody imagery used in the phrases “blood will have blood” shows that violence automatically invokes guilt. The repetition of the noun “blood” shows the audience that Macbeth realises that he is achieved his power through violence. The calm tone used in this phrase juxtaposes the sinister atmosphere created by the word “blood”, presenting Macbeth as a very cruel and callous character . The audience are surprised by Macbeth’s reaction as he seems to be unfazed by all the bloodshed he has caused. This is again reinforced by the metaphor “ I am in blood stepped in so far… tedious as go’er” , which shows the significant amount of blood Macbeth has spilt and will continue to spill in order to gain more power. The adjective “tedious” suggests that Macbeth’s constant killing, and violent actions have led him to feel tired and made him feel as though he is numb and unaffected by his cruel, violent deeds. Shakespeare perhaps explores the idea of how one act of violence leads to another and in due course, we find ourselves in a continuous cycle of violence which can make us feel undaunted by our brutal and callous acts.

Macbeth is consumed by violence at the end of the play. In his last scene whilst he is fighting Macduff, the audience sees that Macbeth is not a coward. He is ready to spill more blood and commit more violent acts up until the very end of the play. As he is fighting Macduff, he says 'I'll fight till from my bones my flesh be hacked'. The graphic imagery used in this phrase has poetic symmetry to the Macbeth the audience saw in the exposition of the play. Even though Macbeth has changed throughout the course of the play, one thing that remains constant is the amount of blood he is willing to spill for the throne of Scotland.
The nouns “flesh” and “bones” represents the continuous bloodshed that is apparent in the play. Shakespeare suggests that Macbeth has become so violent, that he takes his bloodshed and brutal crimes to the grave. Both the modern and the Jacobean audience get an insight of ultimately how his violent actions are the cause of his downfall and the reason he is the tragic hero of the play. The audience perhaps sympathises with Macbeth because he is trapped in this cycle of violence, therefore, he is willing to fight and commit violent acts until his very last breath.

In conclusion, Shakespeare uses graphic imagery to emphasise how violent and brutal Macbeth has become. The audience sees that Macbeth is very nonchalant about spilling blood. Moreover, through the use of metaphors, Shakespeare shows the audience how Macbeth is numb to the guilt that arises when you commit violent acts. At the end of the play we see that even Macbeth’s very last action is filled with bitter hatred and violence; showing the audience that he is trapped in this cycle of violence and will be violent until his very last moment.

Thank you!
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elpe
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Hey, I'm not sure mark-wise but I can give some tips. After having a quick scan of this essay I have seen the word 'violence' repeated at least 5 times, now I'm assuming the question has to do with the violent nature of Macbeth, but that amount of repetition can make your essay a bit monotonous. (By the way this essay is good, these are just picky points) Maybe try using more synonyms of violence in your topic sentences, it makes it less repetitive and more engaging. Another thing; shorten your quotes, if your not going to analyse every part of the quote, its probably because it isn't needed there. 5-6 word quotes max will make your points more concise... Some of your points are slightly repetitive, so maybe plan out your essay before hand and make sure each paragraph has a new point and fresh analysis - again, a lot of your analysis is very good (this will just help you pick up more marks if you show you've thought about the structure of your essay). Maybe try to find different layers of analysis though? Put in some points that slightly contrast what you have already said, and put in enough hedges to justify it - it will make the essay more engaging. If you post the question on here it would be helpful?
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5hyl33n
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(Original post by nivi27)
In the eponymous tragedy, Macbeth, Shakespeare presents the character of Macbeth as someone who is extremely violent from the outset of the play. This is due to how he is described by the captain. Furthermore, in act 4, the audience sees that Macbeth accepts that violence leads to more violence. He eventually ends up in a vicious cycle of violence that leads to his downfall. Additionally, Macbeth’s last actions are brutal and filled with violence this shows the audience that Macbeth is prepared to spill more blood right up until his last breath.
'This is due to how he is described by the captain' -> Do not write this if you are not going to back it up with evidence. If I was marking this, I would assume you don't know an example of what the Captain says.
You seem to be repeating the same thing about Macbeth's violence but by re-wording it. This is a waste of time and will not gain you extra marks!

From the beginning of the play, Shakespeare presents Macbeth as a very violent and blood thirsty character. The graphic imagery depicted when Macbeth is described to have “his brandished steel, which smoked with bloody execution” not only paints him to be brutal but also foreshadows that Macbeth is a character who mercilessly kills. The verb” “smoked” alludes to the fresh, hot blood of Macbeth’s victims on his sword. Additionally, “bloody execution” implies that Macbeth enjoys killing and suggests that he is heartless from the starting point of the play. The Jacobean audience would have thought that Macbeth’s actions were not significant as in Shakespeare’s time, it was very common to have violent battles. This was mainly due to kings being hungry for land and minerals. This therefore ended up resulting in a brutal battle. The phrase “unseamed him from the nave” shows his bloodlust and savage nature. The verb “unseamed” provides violent imagery as to how Macbeth killed his enemies. From this verb we can infer that Macbeth is almost unstitching God’s creation. Due to the Jacobean era being very religious, they would have considered Macbeth’s action’s to be almost blasphemous as no one had the right to destroy God’s creation. By doing this, Shakespeare shows the audience that Macbeth is a character who is unafraid to go against God. No matter how violent the outcome is, he is going to do anything to become the King of Scotland. In contrast to the Jacobean audience, the modern audience would be extremely surprised at Macbeth, this is because violent acts are frowned upon in today’s society.
'Macbeth is described to have “his brandished steel, which smoked with bloody execution” not only paints him to be brutal' -> Excellent use of embedding quotes! Well done!
Fantastic use of context within your paragraph as well!
This is a very strong paragraph.


Macbeth is seen to accept the fact that there will be consequences to his violent actions. The bloody imagery used in the phrases “blood will have blood” shows that violence automatically invokes guilt. The repetition of the noun “blood” shows the audience that Macbeth realises that he is achieved his power through violence. The calm tone used in this phrase juxtaposes the sinister atmosphere created by the word “blood”, giving Macbeth a . The audience are surprised by Macbeth’s reaction as he seems to be unfazed by all the bloodshed he has caused. This is again reinforced by the metaphor “ I am in blood stepped in so far… tedious as go’er” , which shows the significant amount of blood Macbeth has spilt and will continue to spill in order to gain more power. The adjective “tedious” suggests that Macbeth’s constant killing, and violent actions have led him to feel tired and made him feel as though he is numb and unaffected by his cruel, violent deeds. Shakespeare perhaps explores the idea of how one act of violence leads to another and in due course, we find ourselves in a continuous cycle of violence which can make us feel undaunted by our brutal and callous acts.
'giving Macbeth a...' -> This seems to be unfinished?

Macbeth is consumed by violence at the end of the play. In his last scene whilst he is fighting Macduff, the audience sees that Macbeth is not a coward. He is ready to spill more blood and commit more violent acts up until the very end of the play. As he is fighting Macduff, he says 'I'll fight till from my bones my flesh be hacked'. The graphic imagery used in this phrase has poetic symmetry to the Macbeth the audience saw in the exposition of the play. Even though Macbeth has changed throughout the course of the play, one thing that remains constant is the amount of blood he is willing to spill for the throne of Scotland.
The nouns “flesh” and “bones” represents the continuous bloodshed that is apparent in the play. Shakespeare suggests that Macbeth has become so violent, that he takes his bloodshed and brutal crimes to the grave. Both the modern and the Jacobean audience get an insight of ultimately how his violent actions are the cause of his downfall and the reason he is the tragic hero of the play. The audience perhaps sympathises with Macbeth because he is trapped in this cycle of violence, therefore, he is willing to fight and commit violent acts until his very last breath.
Excellent paragraph again, however, since you have mentioned the Jacobean audience before, I wouldn't mention it again. Have you been introduced to Machiavelli? It's a fantastic piece of context that not many GCSE students will be familiar about.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niccol%C3%B2_Machiavelli


In conclusion, Shakespeare uses graphic imagery to emphasise how violent and brutal Macbeth has become. The audience sees that Macbeth is very nonchalant about spilling blood. Moreover, through the use of metaphors, Shakespeare shows the audience how Macbeth is numb to the guilt that arises when you commit violent acts. At the end of the play we see that even Macbeth’s very last action is filled with bitter hatred and violence; showing the audience that he is trapped in this cycle of violence and will be violent until his very last moment.
An excellent summarisation of your essay.
Hello!

I have had a quick read through your essay and it is quite good. However, to get even better marks I would recommend bringing in other characters from the play. Does Macbeth drive his own violence or are there other external factors? Bring in The Witches and Lady Macbeth and explore how they drive Macbeth to his doom.

I would give this essay 20/30.

Please bear in mind that I am not an examiner. I sat my GCSE's in 2019 and achieved a grade 8!
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nivi27
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(Original post by elpe)
Hey, I'm not sure mark-wise but I can give some tips. After having a quick scan of this essay I have seen the word 'violence' repeated at least 5 times, now I'm assuming the question has to do with the violent nature of Macbeth, but that amount of repetition can make your essay a bit monotonous. (By the way this essay is good, these are just picky points) Maybe try using more synonyms of violence in your topic sentences, it makes it less repetitive and more engaging. Another thing; shorten your quotes, if your not going to analyse every part of the quote, its probably because it isn't needed there. 5-6 word quotes max will make your points more concise... Some of your points are slightly repetitive, so maybe plan out your essay before hand and make sure each paragraph has a new point and fresh analysis - again, a lot of your analysis is very good (this will just help you pick up more marks if you show you've thought about the structure of your essay). Maybe try to find different layers of analysis though? Put in some points that slightly contrast what you have already said, and put in enough hedges to justify it - it will make the essay more engaging. If you post the question on here it would be helpful?
I am so sorry - I completely forgot the question is as follows =
How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?
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nivi27
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(Original post by 5hyl33n)
Hello!

I have had a quick read through your essay and it is quite good. However, to get even better marks I would recommend bringing in other characters from the play. Does Macbeth drive his own violence or are there other external factors? Bring in The Witches and Lady Macbeth and explore how they drive Macbeth to his doom.

I would give this essay 20/30.

Please bear in mind that I am not an examiner. I sat my GCSE's in 2019 and achieved a grade 8!
Hi,
Im so sorry I didn't say what the questions was -
How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?

Could I bring in LM and the witches if it was about Macbeth?

Thank you for your help!
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nivi27
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Also, I was wondering why it got so low 😭
Was it horrible?
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elpe
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(Original post by nivi27)
Hi,
Im so sorry I didn't say what the questions was -
How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?

Could I bring in LM and the witches if it was about Macbeth?

Thank you for your help!
Yes you probably could.... but keep in mind that your main focus in this question is Macbeth, and any points not related to him in some way will not gain you marks.
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nivi27
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(Original post by elpe)
Yes you probably could.... but keep in mind that your main focus in this question is Macbeth, and any points not related to him in some way will not gain you marks.
Thank you so much for your help!
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silverdanger
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(Original post by nivi27)
Hi,
Im so sorry I didn't say what the questions was -
How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?

Could I bring in LM and the witches if it was about Macbeth?

Thank you for your help!
I'm sure I brought in Macduff* as contrast to Macbeth to show his violence so I think you could use LM+witches to show them as catalysting his violent path
+ ultimately LM may have appeared more violent to jacobean audience because of the portroyal of genders at the time which has progressed since then.. so macbeth's violence may appear outweighed as they would he more shocked by LM's dominance but may differ now to us watching macbeth

I really hated english so I apologise if this makes no sense at all lol but I did get an 8 in this exam series

*That was mainly because I had revised Macduff more than the title character though...
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nivi27
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(Original post by silverdanger)
I'm sure I brought in Macduff* as contrast to Macbeth to show his violence so I think you could use LM+witches to show them as catalysting his violent path
+ ultimately LM may have appeared more violent to jacobean audience because of the portroyal of genders at the time which has progressed since then.. so macbeth's violence may appear outweighed as they would he more shocked by LM's dominance but may differ now to us watching macbeth

I really hated english so I apologise if this makes no sense at all lol but I did get an 8 in this exam series

*That was mainly because I had revised Macduff more than the title character though...
no, thank you so much for your amazing help!
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5hyl33n
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(Original post by nivi27)
Hi,
Im so sorry I didn't say what the questions was -
How does Shakespeare present Macbeth as a violent character?

Could I bring in LM and the witches if it was about Macbeth?

Thank you for your help!
You should bring in Lady Macbeth and The Witches for one of your paragraphs to show the examiner you have a deeper understanding of the play and can explain how Macbeth's violence is fuelled by external factors. Remember, that Macbeth's violence is self-inflicted but he also gains some of that ambition from his wife and prophecies.
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nivi27
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(Original post by 5hyl33n)
You should bring in Lady Macbeth and The Witches for one of your paragraphs to show the examiner you have a deeper understanding of the play and can explain how Macbeth's violence is fuelled by external factors. Remember, that Macbeth's violence is self-inflicted but he also gains some of that ambition from his wife and prophecies.
Thank you so much for your help!
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5hyl33n
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(Original post by nivi27)
Also, I was wondering why it got so low 😭
Was it horrible?
It wasn't horrible. I'm quite harsh when it comes to marking so in my opinion if you had written this in a GCSE exam you would have got 20/30 at the lowest. If I was a bit less harsh, then it would be around 24/25 marks, which is a fantastic mark!

Are you in year 11?
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nivi27
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(Original post by 5hyl33n)
It wasn't horrible. I'm quite harsh when it comes to marking so in my opinion if you had written this in a GCSE exam you would have got 20/30 at the lowest. If I was a bit less harsh, then it would be around 24/25 marks, which is a fantastic mark!

Are you in year 11?
Yes I am!
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5hyl33n
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(Original post by nivi27)
Yes I am!
Ah, I wish you all the best for your GCSE’s. Feel free to post more essay’s for advice.
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JMR2021_
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Probably a relatively high mark, a 7 or 8 perhaps? It's a quality essay and analysis is in depth and detailed. I would just improve phrasing, (make sure it is more fluid), which is the main thing I can see at first glance.
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nivi27
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(Original post by JMR2021_)
Probably a relatively high mark, a 7 or 8 perhaps? It's a quality essay and analysis is in depth and detailed. I would just improve phrasing, (make sure it is more fluid), which is the main thing I can see at first glance.
Hi,
A grade 7/8
Or 27/28?
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nivi27
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(Original post by 5hyl33n)
Ah, I wish you all the best for your GCSE’s. Feel free to post more essay’s for advice.
Thank you so much - you have been so helpful!
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nivi27
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Thank you very much for your help!
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This is true, and the OP has done this well, but marks also come from (and I'm quoting the mark scheme) 'a judicious range of vocabulary' which could be demonstrated here - please don't dismiss this as nonsense, you could gain more marks if you have an engaging essay.
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