The Student Room Group

Girls tell me I'm not alpha enough

How do I become more alpha and more of a bad boy to attract girls, I've tried to be more of a tough guy but it's not working
Just be yourself, don’t try to be something you’re not.
You're either naturally alpha or quite visibly faking it. Be yourself. Girls who reject you by claiming you're not alpha enough aren't worth your time. It's quite shallow but women get away with it simply because men are known to simp over women and change themselves to get 'that' woman. If you become one with yourself and who you are, you will naturally attract women who 'will' be attracted to your quirks.
be yourself
Reply 4
Lift some weights, put on some muscle and do stretches to improve your posture. Practise standing up straight with chest out and shoulders relaxed. Take care of your hair and beard. Change up your wardrobe a bit: wear some more upmarket brands, expensive trainers, jewellery and watches etc. Focus on your career: getting into a good university, graduating with a good degree, getting a well-paid job. Make some additional streams of income, perhaps by starting an online business or teaching new skillsets to fee-paying clients. Get on the property ladder, buy into some businesses and let out some properties to tenants for rental income.

Why am I saying all this? Becoming an alpha and increasing your sexual market value involve many more things than just your looks. As well as looking your best, you need to have power, wealth, status, influence and high social standing. Women's standards have become so high these days that for a man to have the best chances of a relationship, he needs to have all these things. Make sure you are committing yourself because you want to do it, and not because a woman has told you to. The skills and self-confidence you learn will make you attractive to lots of women, not just the one that you're trying to pursue now. If I was you, I would prefer to make lots of women interested in me and coming to me for attention, rather than the other way round. So that if it doesn't work out with this one woman, you have lots of others to capitalise on. Read a bit about the 80-20 rule and how it affects modern-day dating.
What exactly have they said to you? The alpha/beta thing is very immature and I wish it would die.
Original post by YaliaV123
What exactly have they said to you? The alpha/beta thing is very immature and I wish it would die.

What I wish it'd die is this myth that women like bad boys or tough guys or guys who're a ****.
Switch your focus to improving your health, skillset, financial position, employment history and dating dealbreakers.
Then change your friendship & dating preferences to include mostly compatible women who don't waste their time with 'bad boys', habitual criminals, workshy jerks or any of the alpha-beta/chad-normie/becky-stacy type nonsense.
- Recognise your weaknesses and go from there
- Start working out and eating healthy
- Meditate (gotta work out your mind too man)
- Practice Stoicism (trust me, the Greeks knew what they were talking about)
- Develop charisma
- Freshen yourself up. Find clothing and hair styles that work for you.
- Educate yourself. Read books, research things etc.
- Assert yourself. Set boundaries. Don't be passive.
- Take responsibility for your problems
- Most importantly, don't do this for women, do it for yourself.
Step 1: Stop focusing on girls
Step 2: Start focusing on you

There is no such thing as an 'alpha male' in human beings, there is only observation and judgement. The human being feels pleasure while being watched or judged, this has led to the need for worship. If you go onto social media nowadays, there is the worship of social icons/opinion leaders which create false identities and images for others. This is all human nature, the only way to beat it is to become healthier and focus on the things that will make you who you are instead of being stagnant.

In other words. Play Deus Ex.
It's not working because you're playing a role and it doesn't suit you. Girls don't love bad boys. Some bad boys look great, are confident, social, etc and girls like those things, not really the bad part. I assume nobody wants a pushover but it's definitely not because they're ''bad'' boys.
Take your needed vitamins and stay hydrated
“You’re just not alpha enough” say no one worthwhile, ever.
What are you? A wolf?
Original post by Anonymous
How do I become more alpha and more of a bad boy to attract girls, I've tried to be more of a tough guy but it's not working

Dude, you're going about this entirely the wrong way. Do you even know what a Bad-Boy" is?

You hear all this talk of being a "Bad-Boy" from people who are pretty clueless about them. The vast majority of people who go on about so-called "Bad-boys" are in fact confusing them with anyone who's just a bit laddish, who has a few tattoos / piercings. If you really want to know what a true bad boy is, I'll explain:-

1) They're quick to fight
2) Probably involved in some kind of illegal activity (N.B. a criminal record can be seen as a badge of honour)
3) Will think nothing about spinning a web of lies in order to get what they want
4) Can be horrendously unreliable (if they make a promise, don't bother holding them to it)
5) Hates rules and authority, and will think nothing of breaking them if they get in their way
6) They'll quit a job or abandon responsibilities really easily
6) Their rule of life is often, "have fun first, take care of business later"
7) Will often do things on the spur of the moment... thinking things through takes the fun out of it.
8) Can be very acute (e.g. they can go from being really nice / chilled to a complete s*** incredibly quickly if you rub them up the wrong way)
9) However, they can also be very charming and very charismatic; hence they get often get away with all of the above

It's one thing to become a bad-boy if you genuinely want that lifestyle (e.g. you're attracted to the general danger, adrenaline etc.) ... but if you only want to be a bad-boy so you can get girls, I can see that back-firing on you in number of ways. Furthermore, if you're a bad-boy associated with a gang, then it's basically a lifetime commitment (even if you do eventually want "out", there's always the possibility of a rival taking revenge).

Instead, you'd be far better off improving your physique, sorting your life out and doing other positive / good things to acquire confidence without all the Bad-Boy/ Alpha male BS, as others have already said.
(edited 3 years ago)
Who cares about who views someone as an Alpha or Beta male? Honestly, the perception that a man has to be an Alpha male or doesn't need to take care of themselves is stupid, ridiculous and idiotic. Be yourself and do something you're comfortable with.
Just use Rutherford's apparatus and shoot yourself with alpha particles
If u have to ask this question in this way then u have no hope of being alpha

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending