Need advice on going to a new school

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AestheticStudying
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Hi everyone,

My name is Zara and I’m 14 years old. I currently go to a school in Wakefield and have been going to that school since I was 4. I have always loved that school but ever since going into y7 at this school my thoughts have changed a lot. I don’t really like the school as much anymore and I feel unhappy there. I told my parents about this and my mum was a bit annoyed about this as she loves the school I go currently go to and she thinks it’s amazing but she doesn’t know the day to day life of a pupil at that school - my year group is hectic. They broke a sink in the girls restroom, they fight people, they swear all the time, breaking things 24/7, bullying me and others, spreading rumours about me and others and I just can’t take it anymore.
My dad said I can try to go to another private school instead. I have seen 2 schools I like - one a normal day school and another a school which is a day school and a boarding school. I have always liked the idea of a boarding school and the school that does the boarding is one of the schools my dad likes - he was going to send me to that school when I was younger but just for day school but he decided to send me to my current school as it was close to our house.
Anyways I honestly don’t know what school to go to. There’s a school I like but it is like an hour away from my house and it doesn’t do boarding but it’s a good price and the other school I like (the boarding one) is nice and all but the boarding fee is a bit pricey and I don’t think I’m even smart enough to get a scholarship....even tho my grades are quite high I don’t think I’m smart enough to get a scholarship.
I want to try for a scholarship at the boarding school but idk.
Does anyone have any advice for my situation? Or do u know any private or boarding schools near Wakefield and Leeds?
Thank u for reading this - any advice would be much appreciated.
Zara x
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heldbygrace
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Hey Zara, how are you?

So I very similarly in year 9 changed from a day school that I had been at since I was 4. I went to a boarding school, as a day pupil and I love it so much. I think one of the best things about a boarding school is a family atmosphere which you have, your friends are more like siblings (can make them a bit annoying) and your teachers more like parents. It makes for a super comfortable environment. The two things I would look for is the smaller the better, (mines about 300) and look for one that allows you to do some boarding even if you are a day pupil. My school lets day pupils board once a week for free and as many nights a week on demand if you pay. (So like if you’re parents are away for two days, you could board for two nights, one free one paid. A couple of others I looked at let say pupils boards 10 nights a year etc. I couldn’t get a scholarship when I joined because I missed the deadline, but I have just been awarded an academic scholarship for sixth form. I would definitely go for it because you get extra privileges and looks really good on a Uni app. Changing schools after that amount of time was a little scary, but as long as you be yourself you are bound to make new friends soon! Good luck hunny xx
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by MiriamL)
Hey Zara, how are you?

So I very similarly in year 9 changed from a day school that I had been at since I was 4. I went to a boarding school, as a day pupil and I love it so much. I think one of the best things about a boarding school is a family atmosphere which you have, your friends are more like siblings (can make them a bit annoying) and your teachers more like parents. It makes for a super comfortable environment. The two things I would look for is the smaller the better, (mines about 300) and look for one that allows you to do some boarding even if you are a day pupil. My school lets day pupils board once a week for free and as many nights a week on demand if you pay. (So like if you’re parents are away for two days, you could board for two nights, one free one paid. A couple of others I looked at let say pupils boards 10 nights a year etc. I couldn’t get a scholarship when I joined because I missed the deadline, but I have just been awarded an academic scholarship for sixth form. I would definitely go for it because you get extra privileges and looks really good on a Uni app. Changing schools after that amount of time was a little scary, but as long as you be yourself you are bound to make new friends soon! Good luck hunny xx
Hey Miriam!
im good thx - u?
thank u so much for the advice! It’s amazing to find that u were in a similar situation like me.
ah that’s good that ur school lets day pupils do that - very convenient.
well done for getting the scholarship for sixth form!
thx so much for the advice Miriam! xxx
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if it’s not too much to ask what school did u switch to? - just asking so I can go onto the school website and see if the school u switched to would be a good school for me and stuff. if u don’t want to put it on here u could pm me or smth.
lots fine if u don’t want to tell me - it would help if u did tho.
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heldbygrace
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
Hey Miriam!
im good thx - u?
thank u so much for the advice! It’s amazing to find that u were in a similar situation like me.
ah that’s good that ur school lets day pupils do that - very convenient.
well done for getting the scholarship for sixth form!
thx so much for the advice Miriam! xxx
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if it’s not too much to ask what school did u switch to? - just asking so I can go onto the school website and see if the school u switched to would be a good school for me and stuff. if u don’t want to put it on here u could pm me or smth.
lots fine if u don’t want to tell me - it would help if u did tho.
Hey, I’m good thanks. No problems for the advice. Will pm you xxx
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Celtic Conjurer
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I mean it certainly sounds like a more interesting school the only issue is the distance. If no one can do that journey with you everyday then you couldn’t go?
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Celtic Conjurer)
I mean it certainly sounds like a more interesting school the only issue is the distance. If no one can do that journey with you everyday then you couldn’t go?
I mean my parents can’t do the journey but my dad was saying my uncle could as he lives near one of the schools - my uncle also said he doesn’t mind taking me to school and stuff as well if I were to go to the school near where he lives
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Celtic Conjurer
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
I mean my parents can’t do the journey but my dad was saying my uncle could as he lives near one of the schools - my uncle also said he doesn’t mind taking me to school and stuff as well if I were to go to the school near where he lives
Well if he's able to then I say go for it!
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Celtic Conjurer)
Well if he's able to then I say go for it!
Hmmm yh I think I might.
thx Celt!
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
Hi everyone,

My name is Zara and I’m 14 years old. I currently go to a school in Wakefield and have been going to that school since I was 4. I have always loved that school but ever since going into y7 at this school my thoughts have changed a lot. I don’t really like the school as much anymore and I feel unhappy there. I told my parents about this and my mum was a bit annoyed about this as she loves the school I go currently go to and she thinks it’s amazing but she doesn’t know the day to day life of a pupil at that school - my year group is hectic. They broke a sink in the girls restroom, they fight people, they swear all the time, breaking things 24/7, bullying me and others, spreading rumours about me and others and I just can’t take it anymore.
My dad said I can try to go to another private school instead. I have seen 2 schools I like - one a normal day school and another a school which is a day school and a boarding school. I have always liked the idea of a boarding school and the school that does the boarding is one of the schools my dad likes - he was going to send me to that school when I was younger but just for day school but he decided to send me to my current school as it was close to our house.
Anyways I honestly don’t know what school to go to. There’s a school I like but it is like an hour away from my house and it doesn’t do boarding but it’s a good price and the other school I like (the boarding one) is nice and all but the boarding fee is a bit pricey and I don’t think I’m even smart enough to get a scholarship....even tho my grades are quite high I don’t think I’m smart enough to get a scholarship.
I want to try for a scholarship at the boarding school but idk.
Does anyone have any advice for my situation? Or do u know any private or boarding schools near Wakefield and Leeds?
Thank u for reading this - any advice would be much appreciated.
Zara x
My brother once went to boarding school. It was a nearby one and he first went as a day boy, but he loved it so much he ended up boarding.

I almost went to this boarding school

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abbots_Bromley_School

Just looked it up and was heartbroken to see it had now closed.
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
My brother once went to boarding school. It was a nearby one and he first went as a day boy, but he loved it so much he ended up boarding.

I almost went to this boarding school

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abbots_Bromley_School

Just looked it up and was heartbroken to see it had now closed.
The boarding school u almost went to looks so nice - now sadly it’s permanently closed 😔
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Muttley79
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
Hi everyone,

My name is Zara and I’m 14 years old. I currently go to a school in Wakefield and have been going to that school since I was 4. I have always loved that school but ever since going into y7 at this school my thoughts have changed a lot. I don’t really like the school as much anymore and I feel unhappy there. I told my parents about this and my mum was a bit annoyed about this as she loves the school I go currently go to and she thinks it’s amazing but she doesn’t know the day to day life of a pupil at that school - my year group is hectic. They broke a sink in the girls restroom, they fight people, they swear all the time, breaking things 24/7, bullying me and others, spreading rumours about me and others and I just can’t take it anymore.
My dad said I can try to go to another private school instead. I have seen 2 schools I like - one a normal day school and another a school which is a day school and a boarding school. I have always liked the idea of a boarding school and the school that does the boarding is one of the schools my dad likes - he was going to send me to that school when I was younger but just for day school but he decided to send me to my current school as it was close to our house.
Anyways I honestly don’t know what school to go to. There’s a school I like but it is like an hour away from my house and it doesn’t do boarding but it’s a good price and the other school I like (the boarding one) is nice and all but the boarding fee is a bit pricey and I don’t think I’m even smart enough to get a scholarship....even tho my grades are quite high I don’t think I’m smart enough to get a scholarship.
I want to try for a scholarship at the boarding school but idk.
Does anyone have any advice for my situation? Or do u know any private or boarding schools near Wakefield and Leeds?
Thank u for reading this - any advice would be much appreciated.
Zara x
Who have ypu spoken to about the bullying? Is this a state school?
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Muttley79)
Who have ypu spoken to about the bullying? Is this a state school?
I have spoken to my form tutor and my head of year. They have dealt with it but I know that these girls are going to do it again - they have targeted other students now and I don’t want it to happen again to me.
nope a private school
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Muttley79
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
I have spoken to my form tutor and my head of year. They have dealt with it but I know that these girls are going to do it again - they have targeted other students now and I don’t want it to happen again to me.
nope a private school
That's disgusting - your parents are paaying for this!

I've PMd some good/outstanding local state schools - don't assme Private is better - it often isn't
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
The boarding school u almost went to looks so nice - now sadly it’s permanently closed 😔
The trouble is, there is bullying everywhere. I was subjected to a lot of bullying at my comprehensive school (being held down and spat at in the face, and one girl threatening to beat me up after school every day) and, although there was gentle ribbing at the private school, I would not call it bullying.

Bullies tend to crumble when they are exposed and I see you have dealt with it. This method has obviously worked so if they try try again, repeat the process.

If they are targetting other students, they have moved onto to someone who (they hope) will not be going to the head teacher.
Last edited by Oxford Mum; 5 months ago
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Muttley79)
That's disgusting - your parents are paaying for this!

I've PMd some good/outstanding local state schools - don't assme Private is better - it often isn't
What’s disgusting? Me or...?
ah k thx for taking the time to pm me some local state schools

(Original post by Oxford Mum)
The trouble is, there is bullying everywhere. I was subjected to a lot of bullying at my comprehensive school (being held down and spat at in the face, and one girl threatening to beat me up after school every day) and, although there was gentle ribbing at the private school, I would not call it bullying.

Bullies tend to crumble when they are exposed and I see you have dealt with it. This method has obviously worked so if they try try again, repeat the process.

If they are targetting other students, they have moved onto to someone who (they hope) will not be going to the head teacher.
Thx for the advice on the bullying
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Oxford Mum
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
What’s disgusting? Me or...?
ah k thx for taking the time to pm me some local state schools


Thx for the advice on the bullying
You are most welcome.

It is important to stand up to bullying. Sometimes the teachers and head do not take it seriously but they should do.

I could tell you some hair raising stories about my son being bullied and headteachers not taking it seriously. I can remember going into a school to complain, and them saying it was my son's fault and he was being "too soft".

He was so upset and scared, he would come home, sit under the kitchen table, and refused to come out. He was only 4 years old.

When I was waiting to see the head mistress, I looked on the table and there was a pamphlet, saying they would not tolerate any bullying.

the hypocrisy of it.

When I went home to speak to my then husband, he told me not to make such a fuss about it.

Finally, I got a victory to move him to another table. The bully started to bully someone else.
Last edited by Oxford Mum; 5 months ago
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
You are most welcome.

It is important to stand up to bullying. Sometimes the teachers and head do not take it seriously but they should do.

I could tell you some hair raising stories about my son being bullied and headteachers not taking it seriously. I can remember going into a school to complain, and them saying it was my son's fault and he was being "too soft".

He was so upset and scared, he would come home, sit under the kitchen table, and refused to come out. He was only 4 years old.

I looked on the table and there was a pamphlet, saying they would not tolerate any bullying.

the hypocrisy of it.
Agreed they really should take it seriously.
oh my days that’s so rude of them for saying ur ur son was being too soft!
He was only 4?! That makes it even worse! Poor him - can’t believe he got bullied at age 4! That’s so sad.
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Muttley79
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
What’s disgusting? Me or...?
ah k thx for taking the time to pm me some local state schools
No - the school is disgusting but I have found Private schools less good at dealing with bullying especially if the parent of the bully is wealthy!

We have a 'no innocent bystanders' rule so if someone sees and does nothing they are guilty of condoning it. It seems to help with potential issues quickly dealt with.
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(Original post by 𝔸𝕤𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒)
Agreed they really should take it seriously.
oh my days that’s so rude of them for saying ur ur son was being too soft!
He was only 4?! That makes it even worse! Poor him - can’t believe he got bullied at age 4! That’s so sad.
In fact, he was bullied at nursery school too, but I really don't want to go into that story.

He's ok now, though and very popular at work. He also would not dream of being a bully himself, and is a great friend to others.
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AestheticStudying
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(Original post by Muttley79)
No - the school is disgusting but I have found Private schools less good at dealing with bullying especially if the parent of the bully is wealthy!

We have a 'no innocent bystanders' rule so if someone sees and does nothing they are guilty of condoning it. It seems to help with potential issues quickly dealt with.
Ah right - I was gonna say.
Omg yh I’ve seen that happen at a private school my friend goes to - the bully was wealthy and stuff and they didn’t do anything cus my friend was less wealthy than the bully which is so not right cus no matter what ur wealth is everyone should be treated equally!
I think that’s a good rule to have - seems very helpful. If only my school had that rule. They changed the bullying rules in November but it’s only gone and made everything worse....
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