Confidence Guy
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#1
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#1
Hi, I need to write a poem for an upcoming funeral, but I am stuck. Do any of you have any suggestions?

Skid marks on our hearts
Now we are cold and blue
Whoever knew one day we'd lose you...
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PyroDino77
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#2
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Maybe don't use 'skid marks' because it has an alternate definition in the urban dictionary for not what you want to be saying but it's your choice. Moving on, however, did you know the person? How long does the poem have to be?
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Confidence Guy
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#3
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(Original post by PyroDino77)
Maybe don't use 'skid marks' because it has an alternate definition in the urban dictionary for not what you want to be saying but it's your choice. Moving on, however, did you know the person? How long does the poem have to be?
I want the poem to be at least 2 minutes long. The person was my grandfather. I know the term 'skid marks' has a rather rude meaning, but when I use it the meaning changes to a mark being stamped on hearts.
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BabeW/OThePower
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#4
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The thing is, poetry is an extremely personal art form and however you have been affected by the death of this person is very personal.

Definitely don't use the phrase, 'skid marks.' As PyroDino77 said, it does have unwanted connotations.

Ask yourself who this person was to you. If you were close to them, allow yourself to feel the loss; that often can create some very raw and real poetry. Write when you're feeling things at high intensity if you can (this can actually feel cathartic as well as be helpful for your poem). If you weren't too close to them, ask people about their favourite memories of this person. Incorporate the imagery that they mention and scatter it throughout your poem in a meaningful way. Remember that poetry doesn't have to rhyme. It doesn't necessarily have to conform to tradition. It's all up to you.

It all depends, really. I would recommend looking at other works of poetry for inspiration if you're feeling a bit stuck. One that comes to mind for me is Raymond Antrobus' poem 'The Perseverance', however this is a sestina which would probably require more time to write as it's a fixed verse poem. The content of the poem is still very good though and could be inspirational.

But yeah, it all completely depends on what you would like to do: whether it be a fixed verse poem or a free verse. And it depends on how well you knew the person.

My condolences. I hope you and everyone who knew this person is doing okay.
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Confidence Guy
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#5
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(Original post by BabeW/OThePower)
The thing is, poetry is an extremely personal art form and however you have been affected by the death of this person is very personal.

Definitely don't use the phrase, 'skid marks.' As PyroDino77 said, it does have unwanted connotations.

Ask yourself who this person was to you. If you were close to them, allow yourself to feel the loss; that often can create some very raw and real poetry. Write when you're feeling things at high intensity if you can (this can actually feel cathartic as well as be helpful for your poem). If you weren't too close to them, ask people about their favourite memories of this person. Incorporate the imagery that they mention and scatter it throughout your poem in a meaningful way. Remember that poetry doesn't have to rhyme. It doesn't necessarily have to conform to tradition. It's all up to you.

It all depends, really. I would recommend looking at other works of poetry for inspiration if you're feeling a bit stuck. One that comes to mind for me is Raymond Antrobus' poem 'The Perseverance', however this is a sestina which would probably require more time to write as it's a fixed verse poem. The content of the poem is still very good though and could be inspirational.

But yeah, it all completely depends on what you would like to do: whether it be a fixed verse poem or a free verse. And it depends on how well you knew the person.

My condolences. I hope you and everyone who knew this person is doing okay.
We are coping, that's all I can really say. The person was my grandfather. Please, refer to post #3 as I have explained what I meant by skid mark. I guess I could include my favourite memories of him, actually that is quite a good idea. I want some of the poem to rhyme, I want it to be quite powerful, as if to say one final farewell.
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BabeW/OThePower
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I understand. I have just seen post #3 and while I understand where you're coming from, if this is something you're going to be reading aloud to people who are mourning, I really wouldn't use 'skid marks.' I understand that it has a specific meaning to you and how you are using it as well, but for everyone else who will be listening, it will probably be quite jarring for them to hear that at a funeral. It stood out to me immediately when I read it, so just be aware of that. I also understand that it has a nice beat to it as it's an internal rhyme, but you will need to question if that would be worth the unwanted connotations.

A piece of advice my poetry tutor gave me was that after you feel you have completed a poem, take the best line and put that at the start instead to see how that looks. It may mess up your rhyme scheme but it could be worth the rework for an excellent poem. So I suppose, if you feel attached to the 'skid marks' line, just continue writing as you are, and when you complete the first draft, chances are you would have written a much better line that's better suited for the start of your poem anyway. (I still advise you to definitely get rid of that particular line, however.)

Yeah, as it was someone close to you, that definitely makes it easier to write. I'm glad you're all coping.

As you want it to rhyme, so far it looks like you're going to use a scheme of ABBA. But remember you could also do ABAB. There are loads more that will probably give you a bit more freedom and it helps to try out different rhyme schemes if you're feeling stuck. Another thing about rhyming (and this is the beauty of poetry) is that you can use near rhymes if you find that a particular rhyming word doesn't fit. I often use https://www.rhymezone.com/ if I get a bit stuck thinking of words.

If you want a really tight structure for your poem, consider using this website as well to check the amount of syllables that are in each line: https://www.howmanysyllables.com/syllable_counter/
Last edited by BabeW/OThePower; 5 months ago
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