How to leave my relationship

Hey ive posted before about my boyfriend in the past so i will be breif. Each day I am spoken to like im nothing. My boyfriend got with a girl whilst we was on a break and had some sort of relationship (seeing eachother) however he told me they met twice and thats it. All whilst with this girl he would be declaring his love to me and how he wanted to come home. He had told me it was a fling and we ended up back together the day he came back he smashed a liter bottle of vodka by throwing it at me. Shouting at my grabbing me blaming me for all that had happened. Fast foward i found out im pregnant hes over whelmed its what hes always wanted however now hell acuse me of cheating whilst on the break and try to deny being my babys dad. We went to see my friend and stayed over we was planning to stay another night but my boyfriend was in a mood because a guy messaged me on facrbook. My boyfriend left me in a town i didnt know i was with my friend but he came with me and was willing to leave me somewhere on my own. He ended up coming back and shouted from outsids the window to come and speak to him. I went down and he was in the patio bit near the front door (my friend lives in flats) he started grabbing my face pushing his head into mine and pushing my head hard against the wall. He made me leave and go home with him. The girl he said he had a fling with me messaged me on facebook and she told me everything about him and her ( i would ask him and he would tell me to shutup and too stop bringing up the past other wise hell leave me and its my fault him doing it because i told him to go) anyway it turned out they were seeing eachother each day she was staying at his it turned out shes 16!! She told me she told him she was 18 but eventually told him her true age which is 16 and how they had a chat and he was fine with it. My boyfriends 22 shes legal but its wrong in my eyes shes a child. Also hes been wearing clothes that she went out to town and bought him whilst he was at work and she was staying at hia house. This has annoyed me because when we first got back together he made me get rid of my bed and buy new because he had got it into his own head that id had someone else in it whilst he was away sleeping about but i had not i was at my mothers most the time crying feeling sorry for my self. I confronted him anyway he attacked me (bitting my face my arms my hands. Punching me in the face pulling my hair ect) i told him to get out and i never wanted to talk to him again. He told me how hes going to go do the same this time but with more girls and film it. Saying its my fault all this happened anyway and hes glad im upset. He told me to get an abortion. He ended packing his stuff when i was screaming at him to get out as he started smashing things in my house and putting holes in my door. He had left so i locked my door and wenr up into my bedroom i heard a knock 10 mins later at my bedroom window and he was there he had climbed on my shed dangling down on my window ledge i was trying to ignore him but he wouldn't go away so i let him in. I told him that i was going then. So i started getting my bags packed. He got a stanley knife ans put it to his throat he told me he was going to slice his throat and everyone will know its my fault he killed him self ill have his blood on my hands his mum will know its my fault. This freaked me out so i said to him wtf are you doing sort your head out basically. I carried on packing i didnt want to give in hes done similar in the past i left the room and he started chasing me with the stanley knife telling me he was going to cut my baby out of me because he isnt loosing us. I went up stairs and sat waiting for my mum to finish work he came up we started arguing because i just wanted him to **** off basically he attacked me again biting me hitting me again smacking my legs with my water bottle this time he strangled me several times pushing into the hard bit on my throat i started crying hysterically to which he must of seen which made him stop. I ended up just staying and not leaving because i was scared of leaving because i do not know what hed do. I need to leave for my unborn child but i dont know how or where to start. I have no money due to recently loosing my job due to not going in because ive been so depressed i rely on him financially.

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Why are you bringing a child into this horrible environment please? Leave him for your sake and abort the baby since you are financially struggling and mentally unstable

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Do not try and tell me to abort my child. You are just as disgusting. I wasnt struggling financally when i found out I was pregnant.
Ive covered my own rent for the next two months whilst i am looking for work. Im planning on leaving him hence the point of the post . i am not bringing a child into this situation thats why im asking on advice to leave

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

I also have my student loan which is paid in april. I spent my student loan for february on baby stuff and paying my rent not knowing i was going to loose my job. Yeah im depressed but im not mentally unstable im sure many girls would be feeling depressed in my situation. I cant be that mentally unstable if im seeking advice and help

Reply 4

Anonymous #3

Original post by Anonymous

Just leave him, there's no real affection in your relationship anymore apparently. It's your boyfriend's loss, not yours. Just make sure that you can do everything yourself, and that you've got yourself covered. Tell your parents - make that your priority, you need other people , it seems that your relationship has become too toxic. Let someone who you trust know, and get your own place. Try to get a job, maybe an online one? Don't be stuck in a relationship with him simply because of money... you can always sort that out later. But let your parents know, and let them help you decide the best course of action to take forward.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

The reason I havent gone yet is because im scared of him doing something to him self or to me.
Ive seen documentarys I have researched online. Apperently to up and leave my situation would be dangerous.
I know my mum will help me out money wise my i dont want to have to depend anymore finacally. I have an interview on friday so fingers croseed

Reply 6

debussy_reverie

I think you could call a domestic abuse number and police and maybe go to a shelter if you're worried he is going go find you. or stay with a friend somewhere he doesn't know. You need to get away from him for good

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Besides all this happening he constantly gives me love and affection maybe i havent explained everything the best i could. Its not always bad but when its bad its really bad. I love him i do but i can not be with him and thankyou im going to have a look at womans aid

Reply 8

Anonymous #3

BTW, being scared is the reason why most people can't afford to get out of a toxic relationship... but letting someone know about what's going on, and going to them for help... what can he do once you're at their place? Or once you're with the people you trust?What's the worst that could happen?

Reply 9

Kerzen

Use the online Chat facility for Women's Aid to get in touch with them this morning - the Chat opens at 10.00 a.m.

They can help you with a train ticket to get you to a refuge.

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/rail-to-refuge/

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

Original post by Kerzen