Should I be upset?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#1
My mom got me to meet with a guy and things have been working out and now I'm told that I need to clean my skin, be looking lighter and need to do more skincare otherwise the guy will lose interest or his family won't like me and people will make fun of me.
I'm told constantly to find lightening remedies to lighten my skin tone. Skincare is constantly throw down my throat although I do have a good skin care routine I use cleanser, exfoliator, mosituroser, serum.
They all clean my skin (there's literally nothing wrong with my skin they just want it to be lighter!)
And they don't realise that my skincare isn't going to make my skin any 'lighter' ill always be told that I'm not taking care of my personal hygiene and I look like a tramp.
When I do take care of my skin I have a good skin care routine but just because my skin isn't getting any lighter I'm told I look ugly and skincare and skin lightening is constantly shoved down my throat.

It really affects myself esteem. Ever since a child I was told my skins slightly darker than the rest of my family and now at the age of 20 I'm told to lighten my skin.
I feel like just tearing my skin off my because I try everything to try and lighten it and I do take care of my skin but I'm always told I'm not doing anything about my personal hygiene when I am!!!!!!!!
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AyanG12
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#2
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Oh my, sorry your going through this!
What they are saying to you is wrong on so many level!
You don’t need to do anything your skin, there’s been times where I didn’t like my skin but honestly, the more you start to love yourself you will not allow anyone’s opinion get to you. There are so many beautiful people with a darker skin tone and look how fabulous and confident they feel.
There’s always someone out there for you that will love you in your skin.

Lightening creams is what damages your face. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do. Love yourself always.
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Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
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(Original post by AyanG12)
Oh my, sorry your going through this!
What they are saying to you is wrong on so many level!
You don’t need to do anything your skin, there’s been times where I didn’t like my skin but honestly, the more you start to love yourself you will not allow anyone’s opinion get to you. There are so many beautiful people with a darker skin tone and look how fabulous and confident they feel.
There’s always someone out there for you that will love you in your skin.

Lightening creams is what damages your face. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do. Love yourself always.
This has got me in tears lol

I know!!! They are doing it for me because they worry about people will think about me and what the in laws will think.
But, parents don't understand that the little comments they make really do be hurting.

Ever since a young age, extended family sometimes would make comments about my skin colour and how im slightly darker and my parents would tell them not to mention it again but secretly they would worry too and wouldn't want people to comment.
Since then I think that's why I've had low self esteem, like I look in the mirror and don't like what I see.

Now however if anyone like extended family say something about my skin being dark, I know how to deal with them although secretly I do be hurting when my parents tell me to do something about it!
Thanks for your post!!!
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benjiedaisy
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(Original post by AyanG12)
Oh my, sorry your going through this!
What they are saying to you is wrong on so many level!
You don’t need to do anything your skin, there’s been times where I didn’t like my skin but honestly, the more you start to love yourself you will not allow anyone’s opinion get to you. There are so many beautiful people with a darker skin tone and look how fabulous and confident they feel.
There’s always someone out there for you that will love you in your skin.

Lightening creams is what damages your face. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do. Love yourself always.
I second what AyanG12 says. You should not be pressured into doing something that's not only impossible but shouldn't be done even if it was. No one should have to change the colour of their skin, just because other people are telling them to do so. Be who you want to be, not who other people want you to be.
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AyanG12
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This has got me in tears lol

I know!!! They are doing it for me because they worry about people will think about me and what the in laws will think.
But, parents don't understand that the little comments they make really do be hurting.

Ever since a young age, extended family sometimes would make comments about my skin colour and how im slightly darker and my parents would tell them not to mention it again but secretly they would worry too and wouldn't want people to comment.
Since then I think that's why I've had low self esteem, like I look in the mirror and don't like what I see.

Now however if anyone like extended family say something about my skin being dark, I know how to deal with them although secretly I do be hurting when my parents tell me to do something about it!
Thanks for your post!!!
If your potential in-laws think like that then you need new in-laws.
i understand parents being scared for their child’s future and what people may say but they shouldn’t be forcing their insecurities onto you. That’s something they have to deal with.
Flaunt what you’re proud of, be that skin colour you are proud of!
Don’t cry 😢 it’s a cruel world we live in but if you start the process now of accepting your skin colour, later down the line you would so proud of who you are and will not allow the cycle to repeat itself when you decide to have children
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