Why am I so tight?

Apologies for the graphic post but I can't find any info and at the very least I just need to vent at this point.

When me and my boyfriend have PiV sex, we usually don't do much foreplay (aside from talking). Even if I haven't been the most aroused, he can penetrate me in most cases. Recently, it feels like this is failing more times than it's working. I'm incredibly dry which I feel doesn't work, and I can maybe fit only 1-2 fingers there if I check. The only recent change I can think of is that I started the pill a few weeks ago, but we've had plenty of sex since that time.

I don't understand the sudden change. It feels unfair because every time an attempt fails it just feels so soul-destroying and embarrassing. I like being so intimate with him and it feels like I'm missing out on it. I also feel like I'm missing out on other things because after that I'm no longer in the mood for much else, which is increasing the more this goes on. Being tight once... fine. But when it feels like it's almost every time, and it hurts after both mentally and physically? It's so disheartening.

Can I just not do it without foreplay anymore? Is there a problem with me? I don't get why the sudden change.

Heyy im no sex therapist but heres my thoughts. as you said he may penetrate even when you havent been the most aroused maybe thats where you guys need to take it slower make sure both of your bodies are fully ready for penetration. maybe a bit of foreplay, like you guys can try it, it may be your thing. Im not sure if the pill has anything to do with it tbh did you check the side effects? and no dont worry theres no problem with you im sure its very common you just have to take things slower (in the bedroom wise). if this continues maybe get some professional advice?

Heyy thank you so much for your reply.

I guess I'm just worried about finding a balance. I don't want him to get turned off while I'm taking my time to get in the mood, so I'll probably think about finding something we both get aroused at. It's just weird because we haven't had much of a problem with it before.

I'm on the mini pill and it does say decreased libido could be a side effect, but mentally I'm there for it so hopefully that's not it.

I really appreciate the kind words, and I'll consider that if it goes on too long!