She hasn't answered my apology text?

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Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
I made a thread a few months back now it was this one: (2) Does my apology letter sound sincere enough to get my friendship back? - The Student Room

I was freaking out and getting proper upset about this!
But 16 days ago i finally sent my apology text. She read it the day it was sent but she STILL hasn't said anything. I know i pissed her off, but i honestly thought she would support me after what had happened! It was a really long apology admittedly (much longer than i thought it would be!) and there was no question in it, but i feel like she didn't really read it at all. This is really getting to me now, i wanna tell her how i feel so bad! I'm planning to send her a voice message, when should i do this?
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inneedofadvice2
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#2
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I think you should just leave her alone... she will respond when she feels like it, if you will constantly bother her it will probably make her more annoyed.
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suzakab
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Let it be: you've sent it so there's nothing you can do from this point on in terms of her response. In the meantime, improve your health, education/ career and mental maturity and she could be back later if it's meant to be.
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ROTL94
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You've done all you can, now it's up to her.
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Anonymous #1
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Honestly the only reason I would send a voice message is cos I don't really know if she realised what I was saying in my apology? Like I honestly don't know if she literally did read it, my anxiety makes me think she just clicked on it then off it, so just wanted to be on the safe side
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inneedofadvice2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Honestly the only reason I would send a voice message is cos I don't really know if she realised what I was saying in my apology? Like I honestly don't know if she literally did read it, my anxiety makes me think she just clicked on it then off it, so just wanted to be on the safe side
are you in contact with any of her friends maybe they might know what's going on.. how close are you two?? Because if you guys are really really close and she is super important to you I would just call her.. This is a tough situation
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ROTL94
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Honestly the only reason I would send a voice message is cos I don't really know if she realised what I was saying in my apology? Like I honestly don't know if she literally did read it, my anxiety makes me think she just clicked on it then off it, so just wanted to be on the safe side
Mate, honestly leave it, if you keep trying you're just gonna piss her off, and make her feel like you're badgering her. She'll get back to you if she wants to.
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Chief Wiggum
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I read the first post in your other thread, and I don't even think you have anything to apologise for.

It's pretty normal for friends to text each other. I wouldn't say a few texts sent a week apart is "bombarding" someone.
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Foxehh
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It was unnecessarily rambley for what you were trying to say.
She'll get back to you if she wants to, sending a bunch of texts isnt going to help anything.
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username5430124
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ur text looks like an email bro she probs got bored reading it
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by inneedofadvice2)
are you in contact with any of her friends maybe they might know what's going on.. how close are you two?? Because if you guys are really really close and she is super important to you I would just call her.. This is a tough situation
No I'm not, not anymore Before she stopped talking to me I'd say we were quite close, we used to get on really well and never fell out. But now I feel like she just doesn't care about me at all anymore and it hurts. I'm not sure you saw the link to my other thread but, basically she's not talked to me at all since September. It was the sudden family death, the grief made me get really clingy and keep texting her loads of times and I asked her like is she still OK with me which she didn't reply to either. I hope its in my head, but I feel like when I sent my apology the other week she briefly turned her phone off when my text came through. That's why I feel like she didn't read my apology.
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username5430124
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#12
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not to come off rude but you need to stop begging it just move on bro its ntd
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StriderHort
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#13
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Well if you've already been overly clingy it can push people away, and trying to over-cling to stop them will have the opposite effect. You don't send an apology because of whatever you think you'll then be owed in return.
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Anonymous #1
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Ok confession time now. When I say my apology was long, I mean it was really ****ing long! I just wanted to get it all out in one sitting and here it is:


"I'm sorry for making you feel suffocated and upset. A sudden family death on the 19 September led me to act erratically and clingy for months, but always bugging my friend for company was wrong, rude and disrespectful. I wish I had never done this and can't believe I did, it went against everything I think is right. On reflection, I understand why you were upset. I was being so inconsiderate to you, and I wasn't behaving like a good friend should. I don't know what I was thinking back then, I know my overtexting should never have happened. I'm sorry I was not respecting your texting boundaries and space at this time. And I know I should have told you what happened when it happened instead of putting on a brave face, but I was just trying to spare your feelings even though I realise I unintentionally hurt them anyway. Once again I'm sorry.

I hope you will accept my apology after some time and space, I would hate for my mistake to stop us talking forever. I understand it might take a bit of time to forgive me, I just wanted you to know how sorry I am.

Just to let you know, whether you reply to this or not, you won't hear back from me. Everyone needs space, and I want to fix this by giving you that for a while."


Every single word though is from the bottom of my heart.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Chief Wiggum)
I read the first post in your other thread, and I don't even think you have anything to apologise for.

It's pretty normal for friends to text each other. I wouldn't say a few texts sent a week apart is "bombarding" someone.
Thank you for your honesty but especially when I had a valid reason for doing it, she really should understand.
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username5430124
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ok confession time now. When I say my apology was long, I mean it was really ****ing long! I just wanted to get it all out in one sitting and here it is:


"I'm sorry for making you feel suffocated and upset. A sudden family death on the 19 September led me to act erratically and clingy for months, but always bugging my friend for company was wrong, rude and disrespectful. I wish I had never done this and can't believe I did, it went against everything I think is right. On reflection, I understand why you were upset. I was being so inconsiderate to you, and I wasn't behaving like a good friend should. I don't know what I was thinking back then, I know my overtexting should never have happened. I'm sorry I was not respecting your texting boundaries and space at this time. And I know I should have told you what happened when it happened instead of putting on a brave face, but I was just trying to spare your feelings even though I realise I unintentionally hurt them anyway. Once again I'm sorry.

I hope you will accept my apology after some time and space, I would hate for my mistake to stop us talking forever. I understand it might take a bit of time to forgive me, I just wanted you to know how sorry I am.

Just to let you know, whether you reply to this or not, you won't hear back from me. Everyone needs space, and I want to fix this by giving you that for a while."


Every single word though is from the bottom of my heart.
bro I will say it again you text like its some email just leave it g move on
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Hey!!
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Do you ever wonder whether she's playing games and secretly enjoying this? She knows you don't like uncertainty and suffer anxiety yet she's still leaving you in limbo and messing with your head. Seriously this girl sounds really unbalanced to me. I think the best thing would be to wait maybe a few months, like 3 or something then try this?

"You know the apology and explanation I sent, I do understand it might take a bit of time to accept and everything but, if I give you a quick ring in a few weeks please can I talk to you? I feel really sad about all this, and there's something I need to get off my chest if you'll let me"

I agree you should send it as a voice message. That way, if she listens she can hear your voice and you won't be left wondering if she really read it or not. If it says kept under it, that's a good sign! Since you worry she hasn't read your apology, it is definitely best to acknowledge that first. There's nothing wrong with expressing your feelings, you just need to make sure its in a appropriate timeframe. I would suggest May or June, if she hasn't already got back to you. Then give it maybe a month, and ring her up. Making contact in gaps shows that you respect her need for space. BTW I don't think what you did is a reason to stop talking forever....and if she still won't talk its like she's punishing you for something that wasn't even your fault. That's pure evil. It wasn't your fault what happened in your family no one knows how they will react to grief!
Last edited by Hey!!; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #1
#18
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Does anyone think maybe this is why she hasn't replied?

"Just to let you know, whether you reply to this or not, you won't hear back from me"
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GabiAbi84
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You told her you wouldn’t bug her again if she didn’t reply...yet you’re planning on doing just that...??

She’s made her choice, I would leave her be.
Last edited by GabiAbi84; 1 month ago
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fellowweebhere
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Yeah I’m kinda in the same situation as you 😁
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