LGBTQ+ Q and A Thread

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parmezanne
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Welcome to TSR's LGBTQ+ Q & A Thread!

This thread is designed to answer any questions you might have being queer or as an ally! Although we can't speak for the entire LGBTQ+ community, we will all have some shared experiences, whether it be coming out or questioning ourselves. Feel free to ask for advice, information, experiences or places to find support. :yep:

Below are a number of queer TSR users who are happy to provide advice or answer questions:




Link to the LGBT+ Chat Thread: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=2529505
Link to this year's Pride Hub: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=7034240


Q and A Moderation Notes:

  • This thread is not intended for debate. Any users inciting debate or being disrespectful will be removed.
  • Please be mindful of any triggering content. If you are asking about something that is potentially triggering, please provide a trigger warning and put the question in a spoiler.
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BurstingBubbles
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Happy to answer any suitable questions :yep:
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Darya.
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:pride:
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username5618834
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There's also an LGBTQ society on Tsr if anyone wants to join 🤗
https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/group.php?groupid=32
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Anonymous #1
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I think im bi, okay im pretty much 100 %, but im worried ppl will just tell me to kinda make my mind up? Idk if anyone else was worried about that/has experienced it?

I dont think this is triggering content but idk so i put in a spoiler just in case....
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efeoghenemena
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(Original post by parmezanne)
Welcome to TSR's LGBTQ+ Q & A Thread!

This thread is designed to answer any questions you might have being queer or as an ally! Although we can't speak for the entire LGBTQ+ community, we will all have some shared experiences, whether it be coming out or questioning ourselves. Feel free to ask for advice, information, experiences or places to find support. :yep:

Below are a number of queer TSR users who are happy to provide advice or answer questions:




Link to the LGBT+ Chat Thread: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho....php?t=2529505
Link to last year's Pride Hub: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho...ht=pride%20hub


Q and A Moderation Notes:

  • This thread is not intended for debate. Any users inciting debate or being disrespectful will be removed.
  • Please be mindful of any triggering content. If you are asking about something that is potentially triggering, please provide a trigger warning and put the question in a spoiler.
so we are discussing homosexulity in religious studies class on thursday, and its filled with 98 percent religious folk. I don't know what to do. because even when the teacher announced the the topic my classmates made rude comments and I am extremely triggerd. Even before the class, please help.
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Ethane_the_pug
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(Original post by Anonymous)
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I think im bi, okay im pretty much 100 %, but im worried ppl will just tell me to kinda make my mind up? Idk if anyone else was worried about that/has experienced it?

I dont think this is triggering content but idk so i put in a spoiler just in case....
people tell me that a lot. hasn't happened in a couple months, but i still get anxious about it. you aren't alone (:
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parmezanne
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(Original post by Anonymous)
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I think im bi, okay im pretty much 100 %, but im worried ppl will just tell me to kinda make my mind up? Idk if anyone else was worried about that/has experienced it?

I dont think this is triggering content but idk so i put in a spoiler just in case....
Good question!

I think a lot of bisexual people have faced a lot of stereotypes and assumptions over the years. Whether it be questioning the validity of bisexuality based on your partner, or how it's neither 'fully gay' or 'fully straight' etc. I'm not yet out to anyone who is older than my generation (who would be more likely to question the validity of being able to like more than one gender I think), but I reckon I'll face the same situation when I do.

Just know that you don't have to prove anything to anyone. Even if you only date one gender for the rest of your life, doesn't make you any less bisexual. You know who you are and that's the most important thing. People might tell you to make your mind up, but it only comes out of a place of ignorance and misinformation about how stressful it can actually be to navigate your sexuality. :yep:

Bisexual people always have existed and they always will exist. :hugs:
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becausethenight
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Spoiler:
Show
I think im bi, okay im pretty much 100 %, but im worried ppl will just tell me to kinda make my mind up? Idk if anyone else was worried about that/has experienced it?

I dont think this is triggering content but idk so i put in a spoiler just in case....
I'm bi too, and I think that's something most bi people worry about or feel unfortunately :hugs:There can also be an attitude of "well if you're dating someone of the opposite sex you're basically straight" and vice versa which sucks (my parents are very much of this opinion).

The thing is that those people are idiots and they certainly don't know more about you than you do. It can be worth thinking about what you might say if you came out to someone and they reacted like that, and what your coping strategy would be?
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becausethenight
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(Original post by efeoghenemena)
so we are discussing homosexulity in religious studies class on thursday, and its filled with 98 percent religious folk. I don't know what to do. because even when the teacher announced the the topic my classmates made rude comments and I am extremely triggerd. Even before the class, please help.
That sucks :hugs:
I'm quite tempted to say just skip the class If it would be safe for you to do so, could you talk to the teacher about feeling worried and ask about how they're planning to deal with students being rude? But ultimately you don't have to listen to abuse and if the easiest thing is to fake a stomachache and miss the class, why not.
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username4986690
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How can one be bisexual and pansexual?
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becausethenight
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The Q stands for Queer and Questioning and the + is for anything else really.

(Original post by DiddyDec)
How can one be bisexual and pansexual?
They're synonymous, so why not? BurstingBubbles might be able to explain why she personally uses both but it is fairly common - like people identifying as "gay" and "queer" or "nonbinary" and "genderqueer".
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Snufkin
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(Original post by becausethenight)
The Q stands for Queer and Questioning and the + is for anything else really.
I never knew it had a double meaning tbh. Learn something new everyday. I personally dislike the inclusion of Q in the 'LGBT' initialism because the word 'queer' to me is a pejorative and I personally don't wish to reclaim the word. But... opinions differ on this.
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username4986690
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(Original post by becausethenight)
They're synonymous, so why not? BurstingBubbles might be able to explain why she personally uses both but it is fairly common - like people identifying as "gay" and "queer" or "nonbinary" and "genderqueer".
I don't believe they are synonymous but I shall await Bubbles.
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Smeraldettoi
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I’m lesbian so if anybody has any questions about lesbianism shoot
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becausethenight
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It's basically an umbrella term for everyone who isn't straight and cisgender. Originally it meant "strange" or "odd" (like when you read a 19th century novel and the narrators goes "how exeedingly queer, I could not see how this had happened!" or something), then it began to be used as a slur against gay people as you say, and was reclaimed in the 1980s. It's currently an accepted academic and community term (eg universities with Queer Studies departments, the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy TV show, or Russell T Davies' Queer as Folk).

There has been a push to kind of turn in back into a slur recently which personally I don't like much - any word for us can be a slur, so reclaimining them is important - and like any label some people don't use it or don't like it.

I identify as queer - "bi nonbinary" is a mouthful, publically saying I'm trans can be scary, and I'm here, I'm queer, and sod you if you don't like it is pretty inspirational to me!
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Smeraldettoi
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12/13 when I started getting crushes on other ladies in my year group
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Anonymous #2
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Not trying to generalise here, but when advocates for this community speak about integration into society, they usually do it in the form that so and so percentage of the straight population is in the workforce etc. Shouldn’t employment of people be discriminated only based on talent or qualification and not sexual orientation?

Before people start bombarding me with being anti-LGBTQ, this is just a point that I observed and would like to know you lots opinion on.
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Smeraldettoi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Not trying to generalise here, but when advocates for this community speak about integration into society, they usually do it in the form that so and so percentage of the straight population is in the workforce etc. Shouldn’t employment of people be discriminated only based on talent or qualification and not sexual orientation?

Before people start bombarding me with being anti-LGBTQ, this is just a point that I observed and would like to know you lots opinion on.
I’ve never heard of this? Can you provide sources please?
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becausethenight
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(Original post by Snufkin)
I never knew it had a double meaning tbh. Learn something new everyday. I personally dislike the inclusion of Q in the 'LGBT' initialism because the word 'queer' to me is a pejorative and I personally don't wish to reclaim the word. But... opinions differ on this.
Fair enough - I know opinions always differ on which slurs should be reclaimed/what words people want to use.
I would say the double meaning is fairly well established though (it's on wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT :lol:) and it is the academic term, so I do think it should get mentioned!
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