I feel average

I’m an 18 year old girl and I’ve never been in a relationship. I wish I was the type of girl that got called beautiful, that people would fall in love with at first sight, but I’m just average. I’m Indian and I have basic features, like nothing stands out about me. Black hair, brown eyes, average body.

My whole life only one guy has ever showed interest in me, but that wasn’t fully serious and he never intended on asking me out, he just asked my friend for my instagram. He was also known to be a player so I assume he just wanted one thing.

I just don’t see anyone falling in love with me. Maybe my expectations of romance are too high, like I’ve always imagined myself being in a relationship like in books, and I’ve read fanfictions when I was younger, but I’ve definitely seen relationships like this irl too where both partners are fully in love with each other, but I just don’t see it happening for me. I always feel like I’ll always be more in love with him than he will be with me, because there are plenty more beautiful girls out there. I also really hate the idea of dating apps and meeting through social media, I prefer meeting people irl, but no one ever approaches me.

Reply 1

xDmochi

21

Remember: extra ordinary is also extraordinary, you just need to change the way you look at it

Spoiler

(edited 3 years ago)

Reply 2

nnth

21

Original post by Anonymous

I’m an 18 year old girl and I’ve never been in a relationship. I wish I was the type of girl that got called beautiful, that people would fall in love with at first sight, but I’m just average. I’m Indian and I have basic features, like nothing stands out about me. Black hair, brown eyes, average body.

My whole life only one guy has ever showed interest in me, but that wasn’t fully serious and he never intended on asking me out, he just asked my friend for my instagram. He was also known to be a player so I assume he just wanted one thing.

I just don’t see anyone falling in love with me. Maybe my expectations of romance are too high, like I’ve always imagined myself being in a relationship like in books, and I’ve read fanfictions when I was younger, but I’ve definitely seen relationships like this irl too where both partners are fully in love with each other, but I just don’t see it happening for me. I always feel like I’ll always be more in love with him than he will be with me, because there are plenty more beautiful girls out there. I also really hate the idea of dating apps and meeting through social media, I prefer meeting people irl, but no one ever approaches me.

Are you more introvert or extrovert? Like, do you usually expect the boys to compliment you or have you ever gone up to them? Because having romantic relationships relies on a number of factors, not just external beauty. Your personality, including your confidence plays a large part. You've not gone out with anyone yet partly due to your external average beauty, but also due to the attractiveness of your personality.

(edited 3 years ago)

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

nothing wrong with being average. you have unrealistic expectations, imo.

Reply 4

QueenKagami

15

Original post by Anonymous

I’m an 18 year old girl and I’ve never been in a relationship. I wish I was the type of girl that got called beautiful, that people would fall in love with at first sight, but I’m just average. I’m Indian and I have basic features, like nothing stands out about me. Black hair, brown eyes, average body.

My whole life only one guy has ever showed interest in me, but that wasn’t fully serious and he never intended on asking me out, he just asked my friend for my instagram. He was also known to be a player so I assume he just wanted one thing.

I just don’t see anyone falling in love with me. Maybe my expectations of romance are too high, like I’ve always imagined myself being in a relationship like in books, and I’ve read fanfictions when I was younger, but I’ve definitely seen relationships like this irl too where both partners are fully in love with each other, but I just don’t see it happening for me. I always feel like I’ll always be more in love with him than he will be with me, because there are plenty more beautiful girls out there. I also really hate the idea of dating apps and meeting through social media, I prefer meeting people irl, but no one ever approaches me.

Girl i feel you-

Reply 5

username4262886

11

As above, nothing wrong with being average, average features are the most attractive. You don't have to look like a Bollywood actress for a guy to fall in love with you deeply. Trust and dw about it.

Reply 6

Anonymous #3

I have worse situation. I am Egyptian arab muslim. I am considered inferior in every country apart from my Egypt. I am born in UK I see white people they are all tall and white and have blue eyes. I have black hair, black eyes and sand colour skin. Even other arabs are self hating they all want to be white.

Original post by Anonymous

I’m an 18 year old girl and I’ve never been in a relationship. I wish I was the type of girl that got called beautiful, that people would fall in love with at first sight, but I’m just average. I’m Indian and I have basic features, like nothing stands out about me. Black hair, brown eyes, average body.

My whole life only one guy has ever showed interest in me, but that wasn’t fully serious and he never intended on asking me out, he just asked my friend for my instagram. He was also known to be a player so I assume he just wanted one thing.

I just don’t see anyone falling in love with me. Maybe my expectations of romance are too high, like I’ve always imagined myself being in a relationship like in books, and I’ve read fanfictions when I was younger, but I’ve definitely seen relationships like this irl too where both partners are fully in love with each other, but I just don’t see it happening for me. I always feel like I’ll always be more in love with him than he will be with me, because there are plenty more beautiful girls out there. I also really hate the idea of dating apps and meeting through social media, I prefer meeting people irl, but no one ever approaches me.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by xDmochi

Remember: extra ordinary is also extraordinary, you just need to change the way you look at it

Spoiler

Thanks, that was pretty sick haha.

Original post by nnth

Are you more introvert or extrovert? Like, do you usually expect the boys to compliment you or have you ever gone up to them? Because having romantic relationships relies on a number of factors, not just external beauty. Your personality, including your confidence plays a large part. You've not gone out with anyone yet partly due to your external average beauty, but also due to the attractiveness of your personality.

Yeah I’m more introverted but I wish I wasn’t. I lowkey have social anxiety and imagine all the worst possible scenarios that could happen if I ever approached a guy, although I would like to. It’s not just like that with guys though, it’s the same for me when making friends. I do lack confidence, but I don’t think my personality is bad at all. It’s just that I can’t show my personality until I can get a guy’s attention first if you get what I mean.

Original post by Krisis

As above, nothing wrong with being average, average features are the most attractive. You don't have to look like a Bollywood actress for a guy to fall in love with you deeply. Trust and dw about it.

Thank you, that means a lot.

Reply 8

Anonymous #4

i was in a relationship that, at first, seemed straight out of a romance movie or book. he was so madly in love with me that he chased after me for six months until i realized that i loved him back. we adored each other and were together for hours every single day. he declared that i was his soul mate before we even started dating. and then everything went to sh*t and i am now in ptsd therapy because of him. fairytale romance isn’t all it’s made out to be—if you don’t experience someone proclaiming their undying love for you after one date, then you have dodged a bullet. that type of thing is called love-bombing and it leads to an abusive relationship more often than not, which is why movies that romanticise it frustrate me to no end.
furthermore, if someone doesn’t want to be with you or only wants to be with you for your looks, then why would you want to be with them? you’re just setting yourself up for unhappiness and feeling unloved. i know it’s easier said than done, but you must learn to love yourself first. healthy and happy people attract healthy and happy people. insecure people with unhealthy expectations attract manipulators who will play on those unhealthy traits for their own benefit. find yourself, and love will follow. your worth is not defined by being in a relationship or being seen as attractive. you are so much more than that.

Reply 9

TJ1997

18

I'm a fairly average Indian guy myself and I've been in your shoes, but don't worry. Beauty (as they say) is in the eye of the beholder and there's bound to be people who are/have been attracted to you but are probably a little nervous themselves! I'm something of a romantic and yes it's possible to have those sorts of relationships as long as you don't envisage them to be down to every last bit of the fiction you see in books/films. The grass is also greener on the other side as social media and couples irl have their own issues that are kept well beneath the surface, giving anyone else the impression that they are so loved up 24/7 when the reality sometimes couldn't be further from this..

At 18 I assume you're on your way into uni? If so, use those years as a means for joining societies, meeting people and putting yourself out there to meet likeminded people but also that all too elusive guy you're after; SUs/clubs should be avoided as you'll just meet more players who say the sweet stuff, but vanish once they've got what they need.

(edited 3 years ago)

Reply 10

Joleee

19

you won't believe this but love isn't based on looks. looks might get someone's attention, but they won't 'love' you because you're hot. that's not a thing. so don't for one second think that a partner won't love you equally (or even more!) just because there are so-called more beautiful girls out there.

also you won't believe this either but guys aren't nearly as picky about looks as you think and not nearly as hard on girls as girls are on themselves. most dudes will go out with anyone so long as she's nice looking and fun to be with; you don't have to be the most stunning girl in the room :nah:

. that's a myth perpetuated by women who for centuries have been taught their beauty is their currency.

tbh tho looks might matter more when you're 18 because most people aren't thinking lifelong commitment and you don't have much else to offer at 18 besides having a good time together. it become a lot less important tho the more you grow up and start looking for a partner you want to build a life with; i mean very few quality dudes are just looking for a trophy wife. i realise that none of what i've written will probably change your mind tho cuz you want to be beautiful; so your other option is to ask yourself what can you do to resemble that person you want to look like(?), because tbh there are very few naturally stunning people out there. most of beauty is and can be bought.

I feel average

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