Go to first unread
Back
to top
My mum opened my letter from the GP
Watch
I’ve been trying to get a diagnosis for ADHD for a while now and my referral letter just came through *yay* but my mum opened it and asked me what I was doing with the NHS. I haven’t told anyone in my family about it as they are very anti mental health and all due to cultural reasons and now I don’t know what to tell her. I’m considering telling her that I’m going to interview them and ask about ADHD in adults as I’m making a report on it but I feel like she’ll see right through me. I don’t know how much of it she’s read but I don’t want it to turn into a big thing. Any advice /excuses would really help
0
reply
Report
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
I’ve been trying to get a diagnosis for ADHD for a while now and my referral letter just came through *yay* but my mum opened it and asked me what I was doing with the NHS. I haven’t told anyone in my family about it as they are very anti mental health and all due to cultural reasons and now I don’t know what to tell her. I’m considering telling her that I’m going to interview them and ask about ADHD in adults as I’m making a report on it but I feel like she’ll see right through me. I don’t know how much of it she’s read but I don’t want it to turn into a big thing. Any advice /excuses would really help
I’ve been trying to get a diagnosis for ADHD for a while now and my referral letter just came through *yay* but my mum opened it and asked me what I was doing with the NHS. I haven’t told anyone in my family about it as they are very anti mental health and all due to cultural reasons and now I don’t know what to tell her. I’m considering telling her that I’m going to interview them and ask about ADHD in adults as I’m making a report on it but I feel like she’ll see right through me. I don’t know how much of it she’s read but I don’t want it to turn into a big thing. Any advice /excuses would really help
0
reply
Report
#3
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
1
reply
Report
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
0
reply
Report
#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
3
reply
Report
#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
0
reply
Report
#7
(Original post by Anonymous)
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
0
reply
Report
#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
I doubt ur mum would like it if u opened her letters
0
reply
Report
#9
Being from an ethnic background, it may escalate the situation if OP doesn’t convey this to her mum in a suitable manner.
0
reply
Report
#10
When my dad started opening my letters I told him not to as it's nothing to do with him or I'd start opening his private and confidential letters. He stopped after that. PS my dad's middle eastern.
She's got no right, it's not addressed to her, therefore it's nothing to do with her.
She's got no right, it's not addressed to her, therefore it's nothing to do with her.
Last edited by Pathway; 1 week ago
1
reply
Report
#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
Being from an ethnic background, it may escalate the situation if OP doesn’t convey this to her mum in a suitable manner.
Being from an ethnic background, it may escalate the situation if OP doesn’t convey this to her mum in a suitable manner.
0
reply
Report
#12
(Original post by Anonymous)
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
Tell them it is a private letter, that they had no right to open it and that your health and medical matters are personal and nothing to do with them. If there's anything they need to know, you will share it with them.
tbh they shouldn't of opened it as it was a personal letter addressed to her, but as a parent arguably they have a right to depending on her age...
0
reply
Report
#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
Its better than lying, which the OP is considering, even though her mum will know she is being deceived.
Its better than lying, which the OP is considering, even though her mum will know she is being deceived.
But I agree lying is bad.
To the OP: Very difficult situation, is there another family member that would empathise with you? A father, relative (especially if anyone in healthcare? I'd want to try and explain the situation to my mother and get her to understand, and showing you have the support of another respected family member may make that possible.
0
reply
Report
#14
(Original post by ANM775)
tbh they shouldn't of opened it as it was a personal letter addressed to her, but as a parent arguably they have a right to depending on her age...
tbh they shouldn't of opened it as it was a personal letter addressed to her, but as a parent arguably they have a right to depending on her age...
0
reply
Report
#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
Don't do this!!! Because it will almost certainly unnecessarily escalate the situation
1
reply
Report
#16
(Original post by Theloniouss)
OP has to create boundaries. If OP's parents are willing to disregard her privacy maybe the situation needs to be escalated.
OP has to create boundaries. If OP's parents are willing to disregard her privacy maybe the situation needs to be escalated.
0
reply
Report
#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
0
reply
Report
#18
(Original post by Anonymous)
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
0
reply
Report
#19
(Original post by Anonymous)
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
I agree the mother shouldn't have opened it, but escalation in a situation where cooperation and understanding is primarily needed isn't a good idea
Technically this is against the law as this isn't a reasonable excuse to open someone else's mail.
0
reply
Report
#20
(Original post by Theloniouss)
Okay, but how are the parents going to understand that OP deserves privacy without being told that?
Okay, but how are the parents going to understand that OP deserves privacy without being told that?
(Original post by Pathway)
I doubt they would want to understand tbh judging by the fact they open OPs mail and already don't "believe" in MH.
Technically this is against the law as this isn't a reasonable excuse to open someone else's mail.
I doubt they would want to understand tbh judging by the fact they open OPs mail and already don't "believe" in MH.
Technically this is against the law as this isn't a reasonable excuse to open someone else's mail.
But I'm just saying at this point where OP's concern is the ADHD referral being exposed, it's in his/her interest to focus on encouraging the mother to agree w that before escalating to the general issue of lack of privacy (which still should be addressed).
Escalation to general privacy issues is undoubtedly going to be contentious, and I'm sure the mother will take issue w it. Confrontation will involve raised tensions, and that may make her less inclined to be understanding about the ADHD.
The ADHD may be something that she doesn't believe in, but she could be educated using NHS.com and if possible any in-family healthcare workers. In a situation where she's not already angry, she may then be supportive about the ADHD referral. After this, the privacy issue could be addressed
0
reply
X
Quick Reply
