Romeo and Juliet Essay - Feedback greatly appreciated

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Happs_2705
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Hey everyone,

I have done a Romeo and Juliet essay answer, and have submitted it to my teacher for feedback but she has refused to give me any as she has to mark “too much work” and has said “it would give me an advantage over others”. So, please can someone give me feedback on my essay? I would really appreciate any feedback you can give. Please be as harsh as possible as I'm trying to improve as much as I can. It's out of 30 Marks - I am trying to aim for 28+, do you think I would get that in this essay? I'm not sure if I've commented on enough of the rest of the play as a lot of my points are from the extract. I mainly struggle with using a wide range of terminology, commenting on the effect of the audience and ensuring that I am answering the question and am not going off on an tangent and talking about irrelevant things. If you could check for these things I would be most grateful! Thanks so much.

My answer:






Overall, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the introduction of both physical and emotional conflict that is affecting both households and their members. The increase in tension throughout the play also helps to present conflict as a key theme because it makes the conflict more important in the play and helps the audience to realise the influence and effect the conflict had on both Romeo and Juliet.
Last edited by Happs_2705; 1 year ago
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elemeno3
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hey, my main piece of advice would be that some paragraphs don't explicitly answer the question about the effects of conflict between the families. e.g your topic sentences are more about how conflict is a main theme but that's not exactly the question. apart from that i think there is a wide range of vocab like juxtaposition and zoomorphism, and you've commented on the effect on the audience a lot as well. hope this helps
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username4218074
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didn't read it but I got a 9 in english lit GCSE. Just follow this frame work: point, quote, language/structural/thematic device used, effect of the technique on reader, exploring the themes and linking it to the question building my interpretation, link to context ( can throw this earlier to also emphasise how the technique used by the playwright would have affected the audience at the time OR how the context links to the playwright's own themes)
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stephsmhb
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hey everyone,

I have done a Romeo and Juliet essay answer, and have submitted it to my teacher for feedback but she has refused to give me any as she has to mark “too much work” and has said “it would give me an advantage over others”. So, please can someone give me feedback on my essay? I would really appreciate any feedback you can give. Please be as harsh as possible as I'm trying to improve as much as I can. It's out of 30 Marks - I am trying to aim for 28+, do you think I would get that in this essay? I'm not sure if I've commented on enough of the rest of the play as a lot of my points are from the extract. I mainly struggle with using a wide range of terminology, commenting on the effect of the audience and ensuring that I am answering the question and am not going off on an tangent and talking about irrelevant things. If you could check for these things I would be most grateful! Thanks so much.

My answer:

Starting with this speech, explore how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families. Write about:

 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict in this extract
 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families in the play as a whole.

In Romeo and Juliet Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme throughout the play and as it progresses, conflict has an increasingly important role in the events of the play. The theme of conflict is conveyed in many forms' mostly through physical violence; reflected in the era of the Renaissance where there was political turmoil and many European nations were at war. Shakespeare presents the theme in other forms as well; family versus family, sacred versus profane, parent versus child and language versus inner conflict. Conflict is key in the structure of the play and it is highlighted in the beginning, middle and end. As an audience we are constantly being reminded of conflict which is reflected within the era the play was written in.

Firstly, in the beginning of the extract Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme through the use of violent, war-like language. This is demonstrated in the quotation "Rebellious subjects, enemies to peace" which is largely symbolic of war. The nouns "enemies" and "peace" are both words that are involved in war. They both contrast and juxtapose with each other and they reinforce the intermittent feud and conflict between the families. This demonstrates how prominent the effect of conflict is throughout the play. The use of the phrase "rebellious subjects" shows the authority of the Prince and how he is trying to control the events. It also shows that he is of a higher class than both the families and this suggests that he is going to be the one trying to prevent the conflict. Henceforth, this suggests that conflict is a key theme in the play because the Prince's language is calm ( this can be seen through the use of commas) which implies that the conflict has happened before and that it has a long-standing effect. By referring to the families as "enemies to the peace", Shakespeare is able to exemplify the conflict between them because the noun enemies suggests that their feud and actions will not allow peace to be restored in Verona. Also by repeating the number three in "Have thrice disturbtd the quiet of our streets" Shakespeare uses a standard rhetorical tactic; the Prince emphasizes the repetitious nature of the families' fights and conflict and how they’ve disrupted the city.

Furthermore, in the Prince's speech, he says "Profaners of this neighbour-stained steel -", this creates a strange sounding description, it is like the Prince is referring to the steel in a figurative way— it stands in for other things the blood has tainted. The "steel" can be used as a metaphor for Verona as the Capulet and Montague's conflict have tainted it with their constant fighting. This shows the reader that the conflict between the families has affected all of Verona. Additionally, the Prince refers to the Capulet's and Montague's as "You beasts” and zoomorphism is used here to describe the men using animal attributes. This alludes to the idea that the men act on instinct and have little instinct other than to kill. It also insinuates the idea that the conflict of the two households poses a great threat to the citizens as they are wild and out of control. This shows how casual citizens of Verona would be threatened and affected by the conflict between the two households, even though they are not part of the feud and this reinforces how all aspects of life were affected by the conflict. Animals are lower than man in the Great Chain of Being (which Shakespeare was a devout believer in); Prince Escalus is devaluing the men, implying that they are fools and have the intelligence of an unsophisticated animal. This conveys that the conflict is both pointless and unmotivated and based off animal instinct to fight.

Furthermore, as the scene progresses Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the use of war-like language. This can be seen from the quotation "bloody hands throw your mistempered weapons to the ground". The violent imagery suggests that the conflict is quickly escalating and that the Prince is trying to stop anyone from getting hurt. 'Mistemper'd" has two meanings, figuratively suggesting that the weapons were tempered (made hard after shaping in molten form) by hot blood rather than cold water, and also “bad-tempered". It is emblematic of the physical violence that is occurring in the scene, and the adjective distempered portrays the evolving conflict between the families. "Mistempered" has connotations of anger which is symbolic of both the families mood and the Prince's mood. This shows the key theme of conflict and it also demonstrates that the conflict has led to physical violence and the use of swords.



Prince Escalus uses elaborate and figurative language during his speech to emphasise his high status. On the line "With purple fountains issuing from your veins," he refers to the bloodshed which has been a consequence of the conflict. The metaphor 'fountain' creates imagery of gushing and continuous flowing showing the extent of the damage the conflict has caused and suggests a powerful force is required to stop it. Purple was a colour which used to only be worn by nobility, by describing the blood as purple, Prince Escalus is reminding the families that they come from a high status and should know better. Also, the “that quench of fire” and “purple fountains” suggests that only the blood of the other household can put out the “fire”, which is a metaphor for the anger of the other household. The fire also suggests that the conflict has escalated so much that it is getting hard to control. When the Prince says "And made Verona's ancient citizens Cast by their grave beseeming ornaments," he creates the impression that Verona has been shaken to its core by these outbursts, from young to old. "Grave beseeming ornaments" are the kind of things we'd expect old people to wear to show their status. Using the powerful adjective "ancient" and noun "grave" also point to the fact that the old citizens are fed up with the fighting and brought closer to their death ("grave") by the exhaustion of having to constantly disperse the fights and suffering from their conflict. This conveys that even the old members of society would suffer from the conflict between the Capulets and the Montague's which is making them vulnerable and weak.

Another powerful line which shows the extent of the conflict is 'Canker'd with peace, to part your canker'd hate:" Canker'd means rusted, and this implies that the swords have rusted from a lack of use in Verona's time of peace, but the weapons were needed to part the household's feuding which causes hate that has deteoriated both of the household's respect. At first, it seems as though "canker'd hate" refers to the feud between the Montagues and Capulets that has rusted because of the long-standing enmity between the families. However, the verb 'canker'd" also symbolises being infected, and so the phrase also describe the infectious nature of the conflict, and that it has caused Verona's "ancient citizens" to take up arms. So, the infectious hatred and conflict has caused Verona's peaceful population to wield weapons again, and the Prince threatens to have them killed if they fight again.

In addition to this, Shakespeare uses the structural technique of foreshadowing to present the conflict and to show how it is involved in the play as a whole. This can be seen through the use of "Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace" as it demonstrates that the Prince is threatening death to anyone who does not do as he says. This therefore suggests the severity of the conflict and how it is now at the extent to be punishable by death at the end of the play as Romeo and Juliet both die as a result of the conflict between the families. This implies that there is a direct conflict between the Capulet's and the Montague's throughout the play and that it has a strong impact and affect on everyone who is involved.

Furthermore, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in Act 1, scene 5 through the characters emotions. The use of the quotation "That I must love a enemy" shows the emotional conflict that Juliet is experiencing. This also suggests that the conflict already threatens Romeo and Juliet's love which foreshadows the tragedy at the end of the play. The use of the phrase "loathed enemy" suggests that they're worried about being loyal to their families and the emotional conflict between her family and Romeo is symbolic of the growing conflict between both families throughout the play that is affecting her and resulting in her being stressed and emotional. The contrast between the strong nouns "love" and "enemy" suggests Juliet's contrasting feelings. Therefore there is both emotional and physical conflict between the two households in the play which shows that even if the characters are not involved in the violent side of the conflict, they are still affected by it.

As well as this conflict is presented as a key theme by Shakespeare in Act 2, scene 4 through the character Mercutio and his reaction to the feud. This is demonstrated through the use of "A challenge, on my life" which suggests that Mercutio wants to duel Tybalt in place of Romeo. Mercutio is a violent and impulsive character and his personality is like a metaphor for the conflict in the play. The verb "challenge" has war-like connotations of a fight or a duel. It suggests that the conflict between the families is increasing again and this symbolises the importance of conflict in the play as it is repeatedly referred to. The comma that comes before ",on my life" creates a pause and slows the speed of the scene down. This therefore creates tension and the word "life" implies the risks of getting involved in the conflict and reinforces how everyone is affected by the conflict between the two families.






The conflict between parent and child is visible throughout the play. In the Capulet household the focus is on discord primarily between Juliet and her parents. In Act 3, scene 5 Lord Capulet threatens to disown Juliet; he uses animalistic and threatening imagery: 'Graze...hang, beg, starve, die in the streets'. Lord Capulet also threatens physical violence to convey his anger: 'My fingers itch'. As a father, Lord Capulet has a right to choose a husband for Juliet. He chooses a gentleman of noble status yet Juliet is still ungrateful. In the Elizabethan era, women from an aristocratic family were expected to obey their father yet Juliet is opposing this. This shows that the feud was beginning to develop further conflict between family members.

Overall, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the introduction of both physical and emotional conflict that is affecting both households and their members. The increase in tension throughout the play also helps to present conflict as a key theme because it makes the conflict more important in the play and helps the audience to realise the influence and effect the conflict had on both Romeo and Juliet.
It's amazing however i don't think you'd be able to get 28 as you aren't answering the question. Part of a level 9 response is making perceptive comments that are relevant.
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tinygirl96
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Having read the entire essay this is what I have to say. Your selection of quotes are very impressive. And your choice of linguistic devices certainly impress me. Additionally your degree of analysis is so good too. Your view points are beyond reproach in addition. All in all I would say that this is a grade nine piece of work. However the first half of your essay fails to answer the original essay question properly. Try altering your essay. Best of luck.
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Ambiguous Super
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hey everyone,

I have done a Romeo and Juliet essay answer, and have submitted it to my teacher for feedback but she has refused to give me any as she has to mark “too much work” and has said “it would give me an advantage over others”. So, please can someone give me feedback on my essay? I would really appreciate any feedback you can give. Please be as harsh as possible as I'm trying to improve as much as I can. It's out of 30 Marks - I am trying to aim for 28+, do you think I would get that in this essay? I'm not sure if I've commented on enough of the rest of the play as a lot of my points are from the extract. I mainly struggle with using a wide range of terminology, commenting on the effect of the audience and ensuring that I am answering the question and am not going off on an tangent and talking about irrelevant things. If you could check for these things I would be most grateful! Thanks so much.

My answer:

Starting with this speech, explore how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families. Write about:

 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict in this extract
 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families in the play as a whole.

In Romeo and Juliet Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme throughout the play and as it progresses, conflict has an increasingly important role in the events of the play. The theme of conflict is conveyed in many forms' mostly through physical violence; reflected in the era of the Renaissance where there was political turmoil and many European nations were at war. Shakespeare presents the theme in other forms as well; family versus family, sacred versus profane, parent versus child and language versus inner conflict. Conflict is key in the structure of the play and it is highlighted in the beginning, middle and end. As an audience we are constantly being reminded of conflict which is reflected within the era the play was written in.

Firstly, in the beginning of the extract Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme through the use of violent, war-like language. This is demonstrated in the quotation "Rebellious subjects, enemies to peace" which is largely symbolic of war. The nouns "enemies" and "peace" are both words that are involved in war. They both contrast and juxtapose with each other and they reinforce the intermittent feud and conflict between the families. This demonstrates how prominent the effect of conflict is throughout the play. The use of the phrase "rebellious subjects" shows the authority of the Prince and how he is trying to control the events. It also shows that he is of a higher class than both the families and this suggests that he is going to be the one trying to prevent the conflict. Henceforth, this suggests that conflict is a key theme in the play because the Prince's language is calm ( this can be seen through the use of commas) which implies that the conflict has happened before and that it has a long-standing effect. By referring to the families as "enemies to the peace", Shakespeare is able to exemplify the conflict between them because the noun enemies suggests that their feud and actions will not allow peace to be restored in Verona. Also by repeating the number three in "Have thrice disturbtd the quiet of our streets" Shakespeare uses a standard rhetorical tactic; the Prince emphasizes the repetitious nature of the families' fights and conflict and how they’ve disrupted the city.

Furthermore, in the Prince's speech, he says "Profaners of this neighbour-stained steel -", this creates a strange sounding description, it is like the Prince is referring to the steel in a figurative way— it stands in for other things the blood has tainted. The "steel" can be used as a metaphor for Verona as the Capulet and Montague's conflict have tainted it with their constant fighting. This shows the reader that the conflict between the families has affected all of Verona. Additionally, the Prince refers to the Capulet's and Montague's as "You beasts” and zoomorphism is used here to describe the men using animal attributes. This alludes to the idea that the men act on instinct and have little instinct other than to kill. It also insinuates the idea that the conflict of the two households poses a great threat to the citizens as they are wild and out of control. This shows how casual citizens of Verona would be threatened and affected by the conflict between the two households, even though they are not part of the feud and this reinforces how all aspects of life were affected by the conflict. Animals are lower than man in the Great Chain of Being (which Shakespeare was a devout believer in); Prince Escalus is devaluing the men, implying that they are fools and have the intelligence of an unsophisticated animal. This conveys that the conflict is both pointless and unmotivated and based off animal instinct to fight.

Furthermore, as the scene progresses Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the use of war-like language. This can be seen from the quotation "bloody hands throw your mistempered weapons to the ground". The violent imagery suggests that the conflict is quickly escalating and that the Prince is trying to stop anyone from getting hurt. 'Mistemper'd" has two meanings, figuratively suggesting that the weapons were tempered (made hard after shaping in molten form) by hot blood rather than cold water, and also “bad-tempered". It is emblematic of the physical violence that is occurring in the scene, and the adjective distempered portrays the evolving conflict between the families. "Mistempered" has connotations of anger which is symbolic of both the families mood and the Prince's mood. This shows the key theme of conflict and it also demonstrates that the conflict has led to physical violence and the use of swords.



Prince Escalus uses elaborate and figurative language during his speech to emphasise his high status. On the line "With purple fountains issuing from your veins," he refers to the bloodshed which has been a consequence of the conflict. The metaphor 'fountain' creates imagery of gushing and continuous flowing showing the extent of the damage the conflict has caused and suggests a powerful force is required to stop it. Purple was a colour which used to only be worn by nobility, by describing the blood as purple, Prince Escalus is reminding the families that they come from a high status and should know better. Also, the “that quench of fire” and “purple fountains” suggests that only the blood of the other household can put out the “fire”, which is a metaphor for the anger of the other household. The fire also suggests that the conflict has escalated so much that it is getting hard to control. When the Prince says "And made Verona's ancient citizens Cast by their grave beseeming ornaments," he creates the impression that Verona has been shaken to its core by these outbursts, from young to old. "Grave beseeming ornaments" are the kind of things we'd expect old people to wear to show their status. Using the powerful adjective "ancient" and noun "grave" also point to the fact that the old citizens are fed up with the fighting and brought closer to their death ("grave") by the exhaustion of having to constantly disperse the fights and suffering from their conflict. This conveys that even the old members of society would suffer from the conflict between the Capulets and the Montague's which is making them vulnerable and weak.

Another powerful line which shows the extent of the conflict is 'Canker'd with peace, to part your canker'd hate:" Canker'd means rusted, and this implies that the swords have rusted from a lack of use in Verona's time of peace, but the weapons were needed to part the household's feuding which causes hate that has deteoriated both of the household's respect. At first, it seems as though "canker'd hate" refers to the feud between the Montagues and Capulets that has rusted because of the long-standing enmity between the families. However, the verb 'canker'd" also symbolises being infected, and so the phrase also describe the infectious nature of the conflict, and that it has caused Verona's "ancient citizens" to take up arms. So, the infectious hatred and conflict has caused Verona's peaceful population to wield weapons again, and the Prince threatens to have them killed if they fight again.

In addition to this, Shakespeare uses the structural technique of foreshadowing to present the conflict and to show how it is involved in the play as a whole. This can be seen through the use of "Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace" as it demonstrates that the Prince is threatening death to anyone who does not do as he says. This therefore suggests the severity of the conflict and how it is now at the extent to be punishable by death at the end of the play as Romeo and Juliet both die as a result of the conflict between the families. This implies that there is a direct conflict between the Capulet's and the Montague's throughout the play and that it has a strong impact and affect on everyone who is involved.

Furthermore, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in Act 1, scene 5 through the characters emotions. The use of the quotation "That I must love a enemy" shows the emotional conflict that Juliet is experiencing. This also suggests that the conflict already threatens Romeo and Juliet's love which foreshadows the tragedy at the end of the play. The use of the phrase "loathed enemy" suggests that they're worried about being loyal to their families and the emotional conflict between her family and Romeo is symbolic of the growing conflict between both families throughout the play that is affecting her and resulting in her being stressed and emotional. The contrast between the strong nouns "love" and "enemy" suggests Juliet's contrasting feelings. Therefore there is both emotional and physical conflict between the two households in the play which shows that even if the characters are not involved in the violent side of the conflict, they are still affected by it.

As well as this conflict is presented as a key theme by Shakespeare in Act 2, scene 4 through the character Mercutio and his reaction to the feud. This is demonstrated through the use of "A challenge, on my life" which suggests that Mercutio wants to duel Tybalt in place of Romeo. Mercutio is a violent and impulsive character and his personality is like a metaphor for the conflict in the play. The verb "challenge" has war-like connotations of a fight or a duel. It suggests that the conflict between the families is increasing again and this symbolises the importance of conflict in the play as it is repeatedly referred to. The comma that comes before ",on my life" creates a pause and slows the speed of the scene down. This therefore creates tension and the word "life" implies the risks of getting involved in the conflict and reinforces how everyone is affected by the conflict between the two families.






The conflict between parent and child is visible throughout the play. In the Capulet household the focus is on discord primarily between Juliet and her parents. In Act 3, scene 5 Lord Capulet threatens to disown Juliet; he uses animalistic and threatening imagery: 'Graze...hang, beg, starve, die in the streets'. Lord Capulet also threatens physical violence to convey his anger: 'My fingers itch'. As a father, Lord Capulet has a right to choose a husband for Juliet. He chooses a gentleman of noble status yet Juliet is still ungrateful. In the Elizabethan era, women from an aristocratic family were expected to obey their father yet Juliet is opposing this. This shows that the feud was beginning to develop further conflict between family members.

Overall, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the introduction of both physical and emotional conflict that is affecting both households and their members. The increase in tension throughout the play also helps to present conflict as a key theme because it makes the conflict more important in the play and helps the audience to realise the influence and effect the conflict had on both Romeo and Juliet.
Like the others, I believe that you need to look at the foci of the question.

To improve this essay I would mind map the word conflict and look at the effects it causes in different aspects of the play and on different characters.

By doing this, you will get more ideas which you can integrate into your essay; overall, there's a lot of detail, excellent choice of quotes and good range of subject terminology. Well done !
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Happs_2705
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#7
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#7
Hey everyone! Thanks so much for all your feedback and support, I cannot express how grateful I am. 😊 You're even more helpful than my teacher and I have taken all your feedback on board and completely agree with the recurring thing of needing to ensure that I am answering the question. I will adapt my answer accordingly. Thanks once again and I hope you're all having a great holiday!
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Ambiguous Super
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hey everyone! Thanks so much for all your feedback and support, I cannot express how grateful I am. 😊 You're even more helpful than my teacher and I have taken all your feedback on board and completely agree with the recurring thing of needing to ensure that I am answering the question. I will adapt my answer accordingly. Thanks once again and I hope you're all having a great holiday!
No worries, once you’ve done it Pm me for additional feedback and pointers xx
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Happs_2705
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(Original post by Ambiguous Super)
No worries, once you’ve done it Pm me for additional feedback and pointers xx
Thanks so much! I definitely will do 😊
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Happs_2705
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Hi everyone!

I hope you’re all well! I have adapted my topic sentences and answer so that I am answering the question. Please could someone check if I have done this right and that all my paragraphs are relevant and answering the Question. Thank you one again for all your help!!!

 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict in this
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tiablakexxx
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hi everyone!

I hope you’re all well! I have adapted my topic sentences and answer so that I am answering the question. Please could someone check if I have done this right and that all my paragraphs are relevant and answering the Question. Thank you one again for all your help!!!

Starting with this speech, explore how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families. Write about:

 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict in this extract
 how Shakespeare presents the effects of the conflict between the Capulet and Montague families in the play as a whole.

In Romeo and Juliet Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme throughout the play and as it progresses, conflict has an increasingly important role in the events of the play. The theme of conflict is conveyed in many forms' mostly through physical violence; reflected in the era of the Renaissance where there was political turmoil and many European nations were at war. Shakespeare presents the theme in other forms as well; family versus family, sacred versus profane, parent versus child and language versus inner conflict. Conflict is key in the structure of the play and it is highlighted in the beginning, middle and end. As an audience we are constantly being reminded of conflict which is reflected within the era the play was written in.

Firstly, in the beginning of the extract Shakespeare presents the effects of conflict through the use of violent, war-like language. The prince refers to both families as "Rebellious subjects, enemies to peace" which is largely symbolic of war. The nouns "enemies" and "peace" are both words that are involved in war. They both contrast and juxtapose with each other and they reinforce the intermittent feud and conflict between the families. This demonstrates how prominent the effect of conflict is throughout the play. The use of the phrase "rebellious subjects" shows the authority of the Prince and how he is trying to control the events. It also shows that he is of a higher class than both the families and this suggests that he is going to be the one trying to prevent the conflict. The Prince's language is calm ( this can be seen through the use of commas) which implies that the conflict has happened before and that it has a long-standing effect. By referring to the families as "enemies to the peace", Shakespeare is able to exemplify the conflict between them because the noun enemies suggests that their feud and actions will not allow peace to be restored in Verona. Also by repeating the number three in "Have thrice disturbtd the quiet of our streets" Shakespeare uses a standard rhetorical tactic; the Prince emphasizes the repetitious nature of the families' fights and conflict and how they’ve disrupted the city.

Furthermore, in the Prince's speech, he says "Profaners of this neighbour-stained steel -", it is like the Prince is referring to the steel in a figurative way— it stands in for other things the blood has tainted. The "steel" can be used as a metaphor for Verona as the Capulet and Montague's conflict have tainted it with their constant fighting. This shows the audience that the conflict between the families has affected all of Verona. Additionally, the Prince refers to the Capulet's and Montague's as "beasts” and zoomorphism is used here to describe the men using animal attributes. Animals are lower than man in the Great Chain of Being (which Shakespeare was a devout believer in); Prince Escalus is devaluing the men, implying that they are fools and have the intelligence of an unsophisticated animal. This conveys that the conflict is both pointless and unmotivated and based off animal instinct to fight.
This alludes to the idea that the men act on instinct and have little instinct other than to kill. It also insinuates the idea that the conflict of the two households poses a great threat to the citizens as they are wild and out of control. This shows how casual citizens of Verona would be threatened and affected by the conflict between the two households, even though they are not part of the feud and this reinforces how all aspects of life were affected by the conflict.

Furthermore, as the scene progresses Shakespeare exemplifies the effect of the conflict as the Prince demands "bloody hands throw your mistempered weapons to the ground". The violent imagery suggests that the conflict is quickly escalating and that the Prince is trying to stop anyone from getting hurt. 'Mistemper'd" is a double entendre, figuratively suggesting that the weapons were tempered (made hard after shaping in molten form) by hot blood rather than cold water, and also “bad-tempered". It is emblematic of the physical violence that is occurring in the scene, and the adjective distempered portrays the evolving conflict between the families. "Mistempered" has connotations of anger which is symbolic of both the families mood and the Prince's mood. This shows the key theme of conflict and it also demonstrates that the conflict has led to physical violence and the use of swords.





Prince Escalus uses elaborate and figurative language during his speech to emphasise his high status. On the line "With purple fountains issuing from your veins," he refers to the bloodshed which has been a consequence of the conflict. The metaphor 'fountain' creates imagery of gushing and continuous flowing showing the extent of the damage the conflict has caused and suggests a powerful force is required to stop it. Purple was a colour which used to only be worn by nobility, by describing the blood as purple, Prince Escalus is reminding the families that they come from a high status and should know better. Also, the “that quench of fire” and “purple fountains” suggests that only the blood of the other household can put out the “fire”, which is a metaphor for the anger of the other household. The fire also suggests that the conflict has escalated so much that it is getting hard to control. When the Prince says "And made Verona's ancient citizens Cast by their grave beseeming ornaments," he creates the impression that Verona has been shaken to its core by these outbursts, from young to old. "Grave beseeming ornaments" are the kind of things we'd expect old people to wear to show their status. Using the powerful adjective "ancient" and noun "grave" also point to the fact that the old citizens are fed up with the fighting and brought closer to their death ("grave") by the exhaustion of having to constantly disperse the fights and suffering from their conflict. This conveys that even the old members of society would suffer from the conflict between the Capulets and the Montague's which is making them vulnerable and weak.

Another powerful line which shows the extent of the conflict is 'Canker'd with peace, to part your canker'd hate:" Canker'd means rusted, and this implies that the swords have rusted from a lack of use in Verona's time of peace, but the weapons were needed to part the household's feuding which causes hate that has deteoriated both of the household's respect. At first, it seems as though "canker'd hate" refers to the feud between the Montagues and Capulets that has rusted because of the long-standing enmity between the families. However, the verb 'canker'd" also symbolises being infected, and so the phrase also describe the infectious nature of the conflict, and that it has caused Verona's "ancient citizens" to take up arms. So, the infectious hatred and conflict has caused Verona's peaceful population to wield weapons again, and the Prince threatens to have them killed if they fight again.

In addition to this, Shakespeare uses the structural technique of foreshadowing to present the conflict and to show how it is involved in the play as a whole. This can be seen through the use of "Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace" as it demonstrates that the Prince is threatening death to anyone who does not do as he says. This therefore suggests the severity of the conflict and how it is now at the extent to be punishable by death at the end of the play as Romeo and Juliet both die as a result of the conflict between the families. This implies that there is a direct conflict between the Capulet's and the Montague's throughout the play and that it has a strong impact and affect on everyone who is involved.

Furthermore, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in Act 1, scene 5 through the characters emotions. The use of the quotation "That I must love a enemy" shows the emotional conflict that Juliet is experiencing. This also suggests that the conflict already threatens Romeo and Juliet's love which foreshadows the tragedy at the end of the play. The use of the phrase "loathed enemy" suggests that they're worried about being loyal to their families and the emotional conflict between her family and Romeo is symbolic of the growing conflict between both families throughout the play that is affecting her and resulting in her being stressed and emotional. The contrast between the strong nouns "love" and "enemy" suggests Juliet's contrasting feelings. Therefore there is both emotional and physical conflict between the two households in the play which shows that even if the characters are not involved in the violent side of the conflict, they are still affected by it.

As well as this conflict is presented as a key theme by Shakespeare in Act 2, scene 4 through the character Mercutio and his reaction to the feud. This is demonstrated through the use of "A challenge, on my life" which suggests that Mercutio wants to duel Tybalt in place of Romeo. Mercutio is a violent and impulsive character and his personality is like a metaphor for the conflict in the play. The verb "challenge" has war-like connotations of a fight or a duel. It suggests that the conflict between the families is increasing again and this symbolises the importance of conflict in the play as it is repeatedly referred to. The comma that comes before ",on my life" creates a pause and slows the speed of the scene down. This therefore creates tension and the word "life" implies the risks of getting involved in the conflict and reinforces how everyone is affected by the conflict between the two families.






The conflict between parent and child is visible throughout the play. In the Capulet household the focus is on discord primarily between Juliet and her parents. In Act 3, scene 5 Lord Capulet threatens to disown Juliet; he uses animalistic and threatening imagery: 'Graze...hang, beg, starve, die in the streets'. Lord Capulet also threatens physical violence to convey his anger: 'My fingers itch'. As a father, Lord Capulet has a right to choose a husband for Juliet. He chooses a gentleman of noble status yet Juliet is still ungrateful. In the Elizabethan era, women from an aristocratic family were expected to obey their father yet Juliet is opposing this. This shows that the feud was beginning to develop further conflict between family members.

Overall, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the introduction of both physical and emotional conflict that is affecting both households and their members. The increase in tension throughout the play also helps to present conflict as a key theme because it makes the conflict more important in the play and helps the audience to realise the influence and effect the conflict had on both Romeo and Juliet.
my english teacher always personally reccommends to begin ur paragraphs with the key line of argument but thats how our school teaches it.
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giella
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Well structured, poorly analysed and evidenced.
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jahlover8551
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hey everyone! Thanks so much for all your feedback and support, I cannot express how grateful I am. 😊 You're even more helpful than my teacher and I have taken all your feedback on board and completely agree with the recurring thing of needing to ensure that I am answering the question. I will adapt my answer accordingly. Thanks once again and I hope you're all having a great holiday!
could I have a read?
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Lexi05_7
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(Original post by Happs_2705)
Hey everyone,

I have done a Romeo and Juliet essay answer, and have submitted it to my teacher for feedback but she has refused to give me any as she has to mark “too much work” and has said “it would give me an advantage over others”. So, please can someone give me feedback on my essay? I would really appreciate any feedback you can give. Please be as harsh as possible as I'm trying to improve as much as I can. It's out of 30 Marks - I am trying to aim for 28+, do you think I would get that in this essay? I'm not sure if I've commented on enough of the rest of the play as a lot of my points are from the extract. I mainly struggle with using a wide range of terminology, commenting on the effect of the audience and ensuring that I am answering the question and am not going off on an tangent and talking about irrelevant things. If you could check for these things I would be most grateful! Thanks so much.

My answer:






Overall, Shakespeare presents conflict as a key theme in the play through the introduction of both physical and emotional conflict that is affecting both households and their members. The increase in tension throughout the play also helps to present conflict as a key theme because it makes the conflict more important in the play and helps the audience to realise the influence and effect the conflict had on both Romeo and Juliet.
I’d love to read it and give feedback
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