Should I keep faking being straigt in university?

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Mruczega
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This topic might come up at some point during a conversation while I'm in uni.

I admitted to being gay in secondary school (about 7 years ago) and let's just say that this was how I lost all my friends. The funny thing about this is that I had every reason to believe that they would be accepting.

After I transferred schools things were well, I pretended that I was straight so no one ever found out. I faked being straight at home because to my mother homosexuality is a mental illness and I don't enjoy being homeless.

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of pretending to be someone else. Would coming out during university and being openly gay be safe? To what degree do you think it would affect how people treat me? Do you think that I would get harassed or has society progressed past that point?

I have been faking being someone else both in regards to my sexuality and other aspects of myself that nowadays I only have a vague idea of who I am.
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WantBeAnonymous
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Uni is the perfect time to start over.
Nobody will care if you’re straight, gay or identify as a frying pan.
Plus you can’t loose friends when you won’t have initially so the people you do become friends with will be accepting of you
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pineapplemango
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Be who you are. University is the perfect time to start over.

By being true to yourself and being who you are you will make real friends. People do tend to be way more accepting at universities too, as there are all kinds of people there. I met someone who identified as a cat last year, and even that person had friends.

Society has definitely progressed a lot, and I think the people you tend to meet at uni are the most accepting ones because they are younger, more aware, and generally dont share the views of the generations before them. If you are unlucky enough to meet one person who does not accept you, I can guarantee that you will meet ten people who will. If they dont accept you that also says more about them than you, you shouldnt have to hide who you are because of their ignorance.

I think you should be yourself from day 1, and people will thereby love you for you.
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Smeraldettoi
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(Original post by Mruczega)
This topic might come up at some point during a conversation while I'm in uni.

I admitted to being gay in secondary school (about 7 years ago) and let's just say that this was how I lost all my friends. The funny thing about this is that I had every reason to believe that they would be accepting.

After I transferred schools things were well, I pretended that I was straight so no one ever found out. I faked being straight at home because to my mother homosexuality is a mental illness and I don't enjoy being homeless.

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of pretending to be someone else. Would coming out during university and being openly gay be safe? To what degree do you think it would affect how people treat me? Do you think that I would get harassed or has society progressed past that point?

I have been faking being someone else both in regards to my sexuality and other aspects of myself that nowadays I only have a vague idea of who I am.
Honestly nobody at uni cares if you’re gay or straight, except maybe if you’re in a Christian or Muslim society, university students are amongst one of the most liberal sections of society. Be yourself and be proud!!
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Mruczega
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(Original post by pineapplemango)
Be who you are. University is the perfect time to start over.

By being true to yourself and being who you are you will make real friends. People do tend to be way more accepting at universities too, as there are all kinds of people there. I met someone who identified as a cat last year, and even that person had friends.

Society has definitely progressed a lot, and I think the people you tend to meet at uni are the most accepting ones because they are younger, more aware, and generally dont share the views of the generations before them. If you are unlucky enough to meet one person who does not accept you, I can guarantee that you will meet ten people who will. If they dont accept you that also says more about them than you, you shouldnt have to hide who you are because of their ignorance.

I think you should be yourself from day 1, and people will thereby love you for you.
Oh, I would definitely be friends with the cat person lol.

I suppose I will go for it from day 1, make it into a**hole repellant
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Mruczega)
This topic might come up at some point during a conversation while I'm in uni.

I admitted to being gay in secondary school (about 7 years ago) and let's just say that this was how I lost all my friends. The funny thing about this is that I had every reason to believe that they would be accepting.

After I transferred schools things were well, I pretended that I was straight so no one ever found out. I faked being straight at home because to my mother homosexuality is a mental illness and I don't enjoy being homeless.

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of pretending to be someone else. Would coming out during university and being openly gay be safe? To what degree do you think it would affect how people treat me? Do you think that I would get harassed or has society progressed past that point?

I have been faking being someone else both in regards to my sexuality and other aspects of myself that nowadays I only have a vague idea of who I am.
Have you been offered a place at Uni?
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Mruczega
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Name-calling by an anon, how lovely.
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Mruczega
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Have you been offered a place at Uni?
Yeah at 3 different ones.
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Mruczega)
Yeah at 3 different ones.
Which is your favourite?
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Anonymous #2
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That was quite explicit and rather scorn and quite unnecessary , however that is one way to do it
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Mruczega
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(Original post by Kerzen)
Which is your favourite?
Honestly, I don't have a favorite. I just applied to a few random ones (based on the courses they provided.)

Most of them are within/around birmingam.
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Kerzen
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(Original post by Mruczega)
Honestly, I don't have a favorite. I just applied to a few random ones (based on the courses they provided.)

Most of them are within/around birmingam.
https://www.birmingham.ac.uk/welcome...ect/lgbtq.aspx
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University of Liverpool Student Rep
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(Original post by Mruczega)
This topic might come up at some point during a conversation while I'm in uni.

I admitted to being gay in secondary school (about 7 years ago) and let's just say that this was how I lost all my friends. The funny thing about this is that I had every reason to believe that they would be accepting.

After I transferred schools things were well, I pretended that I was straight so no one ever found out. I faked being straight at home because to my mother homosexuality is a mental illness and I don't enjoy being homeless.

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of pretending to be someone else. Would coming out during university and being openly gay be safe? To what degree do you think it would affect how people treat me? Do you think that I would get harassed or has society progressed past that point?

I have been faking being someone else both in regards to my sexuality and other aspects of myself that nowadays I only have a vague idea of who I am.
Hi there,

I'm sorry to hear that you feel like you have to fake who you really are

My advice to you would to be completely yourself at University! It's a whole different culture, and definitely a lot less childish than high school / college. It's the perfect time to introduce yourself as the real you, and hopefully by being your most authentic self you'll find amazing friends for life! There are all types of people at University - and I'd like to think that all Universities are accepting of everyone

I hope that's eased some of your worries,

Ana
University of Liverpool Rep.
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University of Sunderland Student Ambassador
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(Original post by Mruczega)
This topic might come up at some point during a conversation while I'm in uni.

I admitted to being gay in secondary school (about 7 years ago) and let's just say that this was how I lost all my friends. The funny thing about this is that I had every reason to believe that they would be accepting.

After I transferred schools things were well, I pretended that I was straight so no one ever found out. I faked being straight at home because to my mother homosexuality is a mental illness and I don't enjoy being homeless.

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of pretending to be someone else. Would coming out during university and being openly gay be safe? To what degree do you think it would affect how people treat me? Do you think that I would get harassed or has society progressed past that point?

I have been faking being someone else both in regards to my sexuality and other aspects of myself that nowadays I only have a vague idea of who I am.
Sorry to hear that you have spent so long not being able to be your most authentic self! University is the perfect time to be exactly who you are and it is a great opportunity to learn about yourself. Research whether your uni choice has an LGBTQ+ society and look into their policies regarding Equality, Diversity and Inclusion, all uni's say that they are supportive but you want a uni that actually cares and backs what they say. All this information should be available on their website but also check out their socials as well as any groups and chat to current students about their experiences.
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