Ive got overly attached to someone and now secretly feel devastated

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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 1 month ago
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I feel very affected by something that I shouldn't be and I know Im just not right in the head.

Basically a senior colleague is leaving my place of work (I was attracted to him but nothing could have come of it). The main thing was he has been so supportive for the past 3 years and he told me last week that he is hoping to be gone by 12 weeks cause of the stress etc (he covers several areas). I said that's a shame/we don't want you to etc he just said 'the ships already sailed, I appreciate your support'.

Fair enough, I will try and support him more in the time he has left I'l offer to cover shifts in other areas if need be as I can see he is struggling.

Anyway the thread is about my abnormal reaction to it. I get way too attached to people when I shouldn't. Please note that I never show this Im very reserved and this is the only thing keeping me from appearing somewhat normal to others.

Ive felt so low for the past 2 days and have been crying as though someone has died. I haven't eaten much either, good for a bit of weightless I guess!

I think part of the issue is that I've no boyfriend. Im single and so that's a gap Im working on filling. I think this is part of the reason Ive secretly become over attached. Ive signed up to match.com but it just makes me feel worse for some reason. Also I live on my own and for the past year due to restrictions work has been pretty much the only place Ive been at which I guess doesn't help. Though to be honest I don't think its made too much difference I think Id have reacted like this anyway. A similar situation happened years ago.

I can't tell family/friends about this as it just sounds too odd. Im wondering of some counselling/talking therapy or something, maybe that relate charity though its very expensive and im not a student anymore.

I guess I just wanted to offload and many some opinions. It sounds like im whining but it is really affecting my mood etc and its going to be very hard working with the guy for the next 2 -3 months knowing he'l be gone. Then this will start all over again once he's gone if you know what I mean : /
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JGLM
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Report 1 month ago
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I don’t think being single is your problem, I think boredom is the problem. When you’re bored you focus on things like that and you’ll start feeling alone and wanting someone to fill the void. My advice, go out as much as you can, go and have fun, spend time with friends and you’ll meet someone when the time comes.
Is the guy moving away? You can always try and keep in touch. Or shoot your shot? (What gender are you?)
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 1 month ago
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(Original post by JGLM)
I don’t think being single is your problem, I think boredom is the problem. When you’re bored you focus on things like that and you’ll start feeling alone and wanting someone to fill the void. My advice, go out as much as you can, go and have fun, spend time with friends and you’ll meet someone when the time comes.
Is the guy moving away? You can always try and keep in touch. Or shoot your shot? (What gender are you?)
Thanks, it could be it seems I’m just wired this way

No the guy couldn’t be more out of bounds (has a gf with a baby on the way) and he wouldn’t anyway. Neither could I based on this. I just enjoy the way he works with me, his company and feel a lot more secure with my work when he’s around. He’s the only one who does things with caution/ with detail/ properly which is rare where I work
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